# What was Trump actually implying he did when he said he "grabb\[ed\] em by the pussy" **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 1, 2019, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870 "2019-04-01T17:49:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![SamuelA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@SamuelA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SamuelA)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/1 "2019-04-01T17:49:39Z")
So I strongly dislike Trump and think he’s not competent to serve as President. With that said, the “grab em by the pussy” quote has never made sense to me. I have made out with a number of women I knew were willing to have sex with me. Yet even when it’s a quick bit of hugging and mutual groping before intercourse, I never started out trying to grab their crotch. For one thing, most women don’t respond well to that, direct stimulation of their genitals isn’t something they are immediately ready for. For another thing, even for the occasional woman who is ready for this right away, you still need to make sure first, with touches to other areas and a light touch over their genitals to to try to assess how much heat and dampness there is. And, uh, there’s nothing to physically grab. What I _think_ Trump was trying to say is that as a billionaire and a powerful man, there are a certain class of women who are turned on by his status and fame. They are essentially ready to have sex the moment Trump had them alone. And I think he’s also trying to imply that he believes his sexual prowess to be so great that he just has to immediately have intercourse with these women, and they will soon return wanting more sex. (and, uh, substantial dollar payments) I don’t \*think \*he’s trying to say he physically puts his hand on every Trump groupie’s crotch the very moment he can without consent, or somehow grabs something down there to force them closer. What do you think Trump actually meant? Remember, he can still be a creepy scumbag and yet not have actually committed this particular difficult to commit bad act. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/2 "2019-04-01T17:54:25Z")
I disagree, I think that he was saying that he could literally get away with grabbing women’s crotch. My reasoning is that a) Trump is not a subtle man given to talk in metaphors; b) he does not strike me as the kind of man who cares if a woman enjoys a particular act, only that she submits to it as a demonstration of his crass power; and c) he has a history of other abusive behavior including walking in to the dressing rooms at beauty pageants unannounced so that he could look at the women and underage teen females, while they were dressing. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/3 "2019-04-01T17:55:21Z")
What it’s about is Trump’s insecurity. I know, I know. But, hear me out. Trump is obsessed with what other people think of him. He needs that reinforcement for his psyche to feel whole. It’s one of the reasons he gets so much out of speaking to friendly crowds and why he remembers slights so long. So in the case in question, he’s bragging for status points. He’s showing Billy Bush that he’s very masculine and capable of doing whatever he wants with women and assuming Bush will believe that somehow makes him superior to other men in Trump’s orbit. As opposed to, you know, being an asshole. ---
**Author:** ![SamuelA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@SamuelA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SamuelA)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/4 "2019-04-01T17:57:15Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > I disagree, I think that he was saying that he could literally get away with grabbing women’s crotch. Well, ok, that seems plausible that he would believe that, and at his level of wealth and power, it seems like something he would get away with most of the time. But is he saying he actually \*does \*that? Or just that he’s so famous he could do anything he wanted? ---
**Author:** ![nate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nate/32/13085_2.png) [@nate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nate)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/5 "2019-04-01T18:26:01Z")
I believe he actually does that. It sounds crazy, but I guess it worked for him enough that he never learned that 99.99% of women wouldn’t like that. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/6 "2019-04-01T18:26:27Z")
Yes he was saying that he actually does that. Have you heard the tape? What do you need for it to be more clear, the subtitles to be pink-glow and have a little red ball dancing on top? ---
**Author:** ![CookingWithGas](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cookingwithgas/32/485_2.png) [@CookingWithGas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CookingWithGas)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/7 "2019-04-01T18:27:06Z")
First, I think Trump is a total scumbag for many, many reasons. But since we are talking about one specific quote let’s make sure we have it in context: Trump: Yeah, that’s her. With the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Bush: Whatever you want. Trump: Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything. Given Trump’s propensity for false bragging, I do not believe he meant it literally in this one case, but he probably thinks it is true that he would be so desirable that women would let him do anything he wanted. There are certainly [several specific claims](http://time.com/5058646/donald-trump-accusers/) to that effect. There is certainly reason to think that these woman are earnest but I don’t know of such incidents that were independently confirmed. (I also happen to think that he was not implying menstruation in his Megyn Kelly remark; he’s not that clever and he doesn’t think that fast. But that’s a different thread.) ---
**Author:** ![SamuelA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@SamuelA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SamuelA)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/8 "2019-04-01T18:46:43Z")
> [@CookingWithGas](#): > > Given Trump’s propensity for false bragging, I do not believe he meant it literally in this one case, but he probably thinks it is true that he would be so desirable that women would let him do anything he wanted. There are certainly [several specific claims](http://time.com/5058646/donald-trump-accusers/) to that effect. There is certainly reason to think that these woman are earnest but I don’t know of such incidents that were independently confirmed. There’s not a lot of actual pussy grabbing in this list of allegations. A butt pinched here, a kiss on the lips without consent there. One allegation of what would be considered a pussy grab. All not allowed in this particular era…though, I mean, to be fair, in the 1970s and 1980s, wasn’t this kind of thing sort of expected and normal behavior? I mean I hate to sound like I am trying to justify his behavior…but if 30% or whatever of horny old men act this way, it hardly makes the President an aberration. ---
**Author:** ![CookingWithGas](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cookingwithgas/32/485_2.png) [@CookingWithGas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CookingWithGas)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/9 "2019-04-01T19:02:18Z")
> [@SamuelA](#): > > There’s not a lot of actual pussy grabbing in this list of allegations. A butt pinched here, a kiss on the lips without consent there. One allegation of what would be considered a pussy grab. All not allowed in this particular era…though, I mean, to be fair, in the 1970s and 1980s, wasn’t this kind of thing sort of expected and normal behavior? > > I mean I hate to sound like I am trying to justify his behavior…but if 30% or whatever of horny old men act this way, it hardly makes the President an aberration. It was never expected nor normal, although it was tolerated because of the power imbalance. ---
**Author:** ![puddleglum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puddleglum/32/137_2.png) [@puddleglum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puddleglum)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/10 "2019-04-01T19:17:05Z")
It is a joke. He was exaggerating for comic effect. Like saying I haven’t had dinner yet, I’m so hungry I could eat a horse. He made a claim that some women let famous people kiss them, and then comically exaggerated by claiming he could grab them by the pussy. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/11 "2019-04-01T19:47:30Z")
I think any guy who thinks there are not guys who walk up to strange women and literally “grab them by the pussy” hasn’t been paying attention. Its happened to me (in a bar 25 years ago), its happened to all of my friends. Its a public transportation standard move. Some guys do this - it isn’t about turning a woman on, its a power play to get them off - possibly at a later date in the shower with Mr. Hand. “I can debase you and violate you in this intensely personal way - and you won’t do a damn thing about it” And it doesn’t matter if you are Donald Trump or a near homeless guy on the bus - you will probably get away with it because there isn’t a lot a woman can do about it (cause a scene, anything more will be more bother for her with no probable reward). So what Donald Trump was bragging about is the same power play homeless guys on the bus get off on (and away with). ---
**Author:** ![SamuelA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@SamuelA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SamuelA)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/12 "2019-04-01T19:58:15Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > I think any guy who thinks there are not guys who walk up to strange women and literally “grab them by the pussy” hasn’t been paying attention. Its happened to me (in a bar 25 years ago), its happened to all of my friends. Its a public transportation standard move. Some guys do this Huh. Well I guess I stand corrected. I’ve never seen or heard of this but if it’s a real thing, I guess it’s a real thing. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/13 "2019-04-01T20:03:27Z")
Mechanically speaking (and I must say it makes me feel like I need a bath to imagine what was in the old lech’s mind here) I imagine he’s referring to a grab from behind … around the butt and then further down. Because he’s imagining “just kissing them” - ie a position where he’s got them in a cinch - and a front-grab would be awkward to pull off in those circumstances. Also, most dirty old leches go for the butt mostly. I think he says ‘pussy’ because it sounds dirtier and more shocking. Unless he was thinking about coming up on some woman from \*\*behind \*\*and … ewwww Ok, that’s it, off for my exorcism now ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/14 "2019-04-01T20:10:05Z")
According to the women, he meant just what he said. Jessica Leeds When it allegedly happened: Around 1980 Where it allegedly happened: On a plane What she said: Jessica Leeds, a 74-year-old Manhattan resident, told The New York Times that Trump inappropriately touched her “like an octopus” during a flight from Connecticut to New York. According to Leeds, a flight attendant upgraded her to first-class, escorting her to an open seat next to Trump. Once they were airborne, Trump raised the seat divider, grabbed her chest, and attempted to move one of his hands up her skirt, she said. Mindy McGillivray When it allegedly happened: 2003 Where it allegedly happened: The Mar-a-Lago Club What she said: Mindy McGillivray, a 36-year-old Palm Springs, Florida, resident, told the Palm Beach Post that Trump groped her 13 years ago when she was assisting a photographer hired to work a concert at the club. "This was a pretty good nudge. More of a grab,‘’ she said. "It was pretty close to the center of my butt. I was startled. I jumped.‘’ Kristin Anderson When it allegedly happened: Early 1990s Where it allegedly happened: A Manhattan nightclub What she said: Today Anderson is a photographer, but back then she was an aspiring model. She told the Washington Post she was sitting on a couch and talking to friends when, as the Washington Post describes it, “his fingers slid under her miniskirt, moved up her inner thigh, and touched her vagina through her underwear.” She didn’t know Trump, but says she recognized him instantly when she pulled away. CNN has not independently confirmed the claim. Jill Harth When it allegedly happened: 1992-1993 Where it allegedly happened: A Manhattan nightclub and later at Trump’s Mar-A-Lago Club What she said: Harth and her then-boyfriend, George Houraney, entered into a business venture with Donald Trump which included holding an event at one of the real estate magnate’s Atlantic City casinos. Donald Trump made unwanted sexual advances towards her, including groping her under her skirt on two different occasions in 1992 and 1993 during their initial meetings, according to Harth’s lawyer, Lisa Bloom. [Cite](https://www.cnn.com/2016/10/14/politics/trump-women-accusers/index.html) ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/15 "2019-04-01T20:11:49Z")
Perhaps Trump read [The Miller’s Tale](https://sites.fas.harvard.edu/~chaucer/teachslf/milt-par.htm) in _The Canterbury Tales_. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/16 "2019-04-01T20:40:31Z")
He’s a bully and sexual predator, and was bragging about how he can attack women and they don’t dare fight back. ---
**Author:** ![LAZombie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b38774/32.png) [@LAZombie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LAZombie)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/17 "2019-04-01T23:13:30Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > He’s a bully and sexual predator, and was bragging about how he can attack women and they don’t dare fight back. The woman who Trump was talking about, Arianne Zucker, said this about Trump, “I did flirt with him. Yes, I did.” “He’s my new best friend.” “He is so cute and charming.” [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/X1Hs4vgmyWQ/hqdefault.jpg "Arianne Zucker/Donald Trumps Days of Our Lives 2005") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1Hs4vgmyWQ) ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/18 "2019-04-01T23:16:04Z")
It’s happened to me too. Once while I was standing in line at Great America. Another time, a guy coming out of a bar tried to, but he was so drunk, he missed and caught me around the lower stomach. I can’t imagine what the two women with him thought. This sort of thing was called groping once upon a time. Remember that guy who was on a security cam being body slammed by a waitress? That’s what he did to her. ---
**Author:** ![dorvann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df705f/32.png) [@dorvann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorvann)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/19 "2019-04-01T23:46:27Z")
> [@Jonathan\_Chance](#): > > What it’s about is Trump’s insecurity. > > I know, I know. But, hear me out. Trump is obsessed with what other people think of him. He needs that reinforcement for his psyche to feel whole. It’s one of the reasons he gets so much out of speaking to friendly crowds and why he remembers slights so long. > > So in the case in question, he’s bragging for status points. He’s showing Billy Bush that he’s very masculine and capable of doing whatever he wants with women and assuming Bush will believe that somehow makes him superior to other men in Trump’s orbit. > > As opposed to, you know, being an asshole. My feelings exactly. He sounded like the old guy at gym who is desperately trying to impress the young guys and seem “cool”. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870/20 "2019-04-01T23:55:58Z")
> [@puddleglum](#): > > It is a joke. > He was exaggerating for comic effect. Like saying I haven’t had dinner yet, I’m so hungry I could eat a horse. > He made a claim that some women let famous people kiss them, and then comically exaggerated by claiming he could grab them by the pussy. Did you laugh? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-trump-actually-implying-he-did-when-he-said-he-grabb-ed-em-by-the-pussy/831870.md?page=2)