# What was your favorite hiding place for contraband when you were a kid?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [September 23, 2009, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271 "2009-09-23T18:35:12Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/1 "2009-09-23T18:35:12Z")
From a conversation in the waking, but SDMB is a much bigger group.
Contraband can be defined as _anything_ you didn’t want your parents to find whether it was love notes, porn, gold bars or 6 kilos of uncut heroin.
My favorite places:
-For flat paper (report cards, notes from teachers, etc.): taped to the roof of the cabinet under the sink. Later I taped a manila envelope large enough to stash two porn mags in under one sink.
For my diversionary diary (the one that I knew my mother would read if she came across so I didn’t put anything incendiary into it): between my mattress and box springs
For my “real” diary (the Procopius’s Secret History one): I had a giant Snoopy stuffed animal, a hand me down from my brother and sister. He had a “broken neck”, meaning years of wear and tear made his head tilt to the side, and he wore a homemade collar- basically a homemade neck brace- to prop it up. What I don’t think anybody ever learned was that under that collar he also had a cut throat where I could reach into the stuffing and hide something at hand’s length. He lived in the back of a closet and was assumed to be kept for sentimental value.
For anything larger than a lunchbox- rare but occasionally happened: under a pile of old clothes and quilt tops on the shelf of my parents’ walk-in-closet. I figured it would be the last place they’d look, and usually such stuff was just there until I could move it off-site.
Et tu?
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### Author:  [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/2 "2009-09-23T18:40:52Z")
I guess I was a good little boy, because I don’t remember having to hide anything.
Apart from one occasion when I tried to make a D look like a B my reports transfered from my school to my parents unaltered. They weren’t _good_ reports. I just didn’t always care that I got bad reports.
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### Author:  [@Gus\_Gusterson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gus_Gusterson)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/3 "2009-09-23T18:56:04Z")
I hid my porn magazines under the rug in my bedroom and placed a foot locker on top of the spot. I don’t think anyone ever found them. The ones I hid under my mattress disappeared, but the ones under the rug never did.
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### Author:  [@Kalypso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalypso)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/4 "2009-09-23T19:00:36Z")
I had a bed with drawers in the base. I’d pull a drawer all the way out and put contraband on the floor underneath or in the rather large empty space behind the drawers.
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### Author:  [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/5 "2009-09-23T19:01:58Z")
Oh my, not so much contraband but…
When I was in the first grade my work papers from school were not up to par so whenever I received a bad grade on a paper while walking home I would stuff it into cinderblocks stacked in front of a neighbor’s house. This went on for months paper after paper and I never seemed to figure out the blocks would one day be used and eventually be found. One very bad day a wind storm occurred and all my bad papers with my name on them were blowing all around the neighborhood. For days after helpful residents were bringing my Ds & Fs to my door. Needless to say my parents were pissed and embarrassed. It’s funny, child logic where did I think the papers were going to end up?
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### Author:  [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/6 "2009-09-23T19:04:26Z")
It the basement inbetween the floor joists on top of the ductwork.
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### Author:  [@whole\_bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whole_bean)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/7 "2009-09-23T19:06:14Z")
I hid four torn pages from a porn magazine in a He-Man, Masters of the Universe story book. The book came with a 45 record that fit in a pocket on the inside of the back cover. That’s where the pages of the dirty magazine went. I hid smokeless tobacco (dip) under the driver’s seat of my car (it rested on top of something - it wasn’t on the floor) and cigarettes in the side pocket of my golf bag, behind the folded rain hood. I generally finished booze within hours of purchase.
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### Author:  [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/8 "2009-09-23T19:07:05Z")
> [@Kalypso](#):
>
> I had a bed with drawers in the base. I’d pull a drawer all the way out and put contraband on the floor underneath or in the rather large empty space behind the drawers.
That was mine except it was a regular desk with drawers. I hid marijuana and cash under there.
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### Author:  [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/9 "2009-09-23T19:07:22Z")
In the mid-eighties, my computer was a Coleco Adam.
The Adam had a [spacious cavity](http://www.myoldcomputers.com/museum/comp/museumpics/adam03.jpg) in the main unit, where the expansion slots were, which put the Millennium Falcon to shame as far as concealment was concerned. (“You put your _weed_ in it!”) My parents would _never_ have thought to look in there in a million years.
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### Author:  [@JoseArcadio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoseArcadio)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/10 "2009-09-23T19:07:43Z")
My parents were very lax about what their kids got up to, rarely entered my room without knocking and it such a mess it would take a lot of searching to find anything so I stashed drugs, booze, shoplifted goods etc. wherever was most convenient at the time.
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/11 "2009-09-23T19:23:28Z")
Bwhaaa… oh man, nice to see a bunch of others were equally secretive. Geez, I’d forgotton all about this but it’s floodin’ back.
In my closet was a chest of drawers. The top couple of inches above the upper drawer had a thin board across to give it proportion and I’d pried that back to reveal a short but amble enclosure. This is where I kept fireworks, pocketknives, grass, magazines, anything considered vice.
Later I discovered a loose board forming the base of a windowseat. Same contraband, more volume.
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### Author:  [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/12 "2009-09-23T20:31:01Z")
:: taking notes for future reference ::
It’s funny how technology changes things…all the stories about hiding/changing grades or report cards are out of date already. My son just started kindergarten and already I have online access to all his grades and attendance. My thoughts on this were, this is great for parents but I am sure glad this did not exist when I was in school!
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### Author:  [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/13 "2009-09-23T20:43:03Z")
> [@Velma](#):
>
> :: taking notes for future reference ::
>
> It’s funny how technology changes things…all the stories about hiding/changing grades or report cards are out of date already. My son just started kindergarten and already I have online access to all his grades and attendance. My thoughts on this were, this is great for parents but I am sure glad this did not exist when I was in school!
Same here. But we also (guys anyway) had to hide our porn (most of which for me was actually PG-13 except for one mag I stole from my brother) in a physical hidey-hole; today you just have to know how to delete your history and since there are so many kids more compu-literate than their parents it’s often really easy. So it balances.
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### Author:  [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/14 "2009-09-23T21:02:06Z")
Inside my bean-bag chair. There was a little zipper on the bottom.
I learned pretty quickly that I had to spray my hand with Static Guard before I put anything in or took anything out - those little beans would stick to everything.
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### Author:  [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/15 "2009-09-23T21:32:59Z")
Yep, in the bean bag chair! When I was a teenager, I hid my birth control pills in there. No one ever came in and tossed my room, but it was an easy and convenient place to hide contraband and I kept that thing for years. Then I graduated to a metal box with a lock and key, kept under the bed with a lot of other stuff.
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### Author:  [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/16 "2009-09-23T21:38:52Z")
In my underwear for the weed.
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### Author:  [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/17 "2009-09-23T21:57:28Z")
Myt closet was one of those that had a hanging rod and a shelf above.
The rod was a hollow metal pipe. I loosened the top shelf, slipped out the end of the hanging rod and stuffed my stash inside, then put the rod and the shelf back.
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### Author:  [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/18 "2009-09-23T22:52:24Z")
> [@Sound Mind](#):
>
> Myt closet was one of those that had a hanging rod and a shelf above.
>
> The rod was a hollow metal pipe. I loosened the top shelf, slipped out the end of the hanging rod and stuffed my stash inside, then put the rod and the shelf back.
I did very much the same with a hollow bathroom towel rod. I was staying the summer at my aunts an uncles and had a huge bedroom at the far end of the house with it’s own bathroom.
Also, the back seat of my '62 Olds had a fold down armrest. There was a flap you could pull down behind that and a little place you could hang stuff. But then in the late 70’s I also had a place I could hang my mj pipe while I drove around and smoked. I can’t imagine how many times I forgot about it and just let it hang there in the school parking lot. Times have changed.
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### Author:  [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/19 "2009-09-23T23:41:24Z")
I had to hide candy from my mom and brother, and my school backpack was a good place for it. I also remember hiding it under the bed.
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### Author:  [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2009, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-was-your-favorite-hiding-place-for-contraband-when-you-were-a-kid/511271/20 "2009-09-23T23:56:05Z")
Weed was taped to a drawer somehow - I was trying to think how, and I can’t remember! Too much weed back in the day, I guess! 😉 My older sister taught me all the good hidey-holes.
This thread reminds me of a book - _A Child’s Garden of Grass_. I remember it showed how to make a pipe out of a “dur-dur” - an empty toilet paper roll! 😃
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