# What were the first words out of your mouth this morning? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 20, 2008, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477 "2008-09-20T20:23:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![rucciface](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ba9def/32.png) [@rucciface](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rucciface)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/1 "2008-09-20T20:23:50Z")
My boyfriend just reminded me of this. Apparently, he’s been a little miffed at me today because of what I said this morning. I don’t remember it because I said it before I was quite awake, but it was a doozy… Usually, the first thing I say every morning is, “Good morning, handsome.” But last night I dreamed that I was a man. Come to think of it, maybe I wasn’t a man, but anyway I had a man’s haircut. And I was trying to fix it, but it just wouldn’t look right, and boy was I mad! I even woke up cranky. According to him, this is what I said: Me: “Could you please go in another room to do that? Christ.” Him: “What am I doing?” Me: “Breathing.” I’m much better now, though, and so is he. So what was the first thing you said this morning? ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/2 "2008-09-20T20:33:14Z")
“Mrrhhllo?” “Whrrrr? No… I’ve been up. Since, uh, nine. I was just, uh, cleaning.” ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/3 "2008-09-20T20:35:17Z")
“Mrrf.” Translation: Yes, I know it’s morning, give me a minute, please. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/4 "2008-09-20T20:40:39Z")
“This is not a hangover. I’m just dehydrated. Where’s the advil?” ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/5 "2008-09-20T20:42:50Z")
You know, I haven’t actually spoken yet today. I’m about to go get something to eat, so that will necessitate speaking. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/6 "2008-09-20T20:45:41Z")
“Go lay down!!!” to my lovely Lab, Lucy. An hour later, I got up and told her she was a good girl. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/7 "2008-09-20T20:50:09Z")
“Go away, Havoc!” It was past my usual Time of Arising, and the cats wanted their breakfast. The above was followed with, as usual, “Oh, all right. I’m up already!” ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/8 "2008-09-20T20:51:03Z")
I call out “Girlie!” That’s my little girl cat’s name. She’s been gone a month now, but I still say it every morning anyway. I’m sentimental. It’s the first thing I’ve said in the morning for a while now. Her thing was to lie in wait for me to come out of my room in the morning, and attack my ankles as I stagger upstairs to get coffee. Right after I say “Girlie” and she ambushed me, I’d say “I’ll get you!” It was our morning routine. ---
**Author:** ![SpecialAgentJem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f6c823/32.png) [@SpecialAgentJem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpecialAgentJem)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/9 "2008-09-20T20:51:38Z")
it went something like this - me: **sobbing** please just five more minutes, just dont let me fall asleep. flatmate: how will I know when five minutes have past? me: I dont care, i really really dont wanna get up. I hate working weekends! Especially 7am on a saturday - it kills! ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/10 "2008-09-20T20:58:07Z")
“Stop chewing on plastic bags! That is a good way to accidentally kill yourself, dammit!” Apparently I was not getting up fast enough for the cats and they felt like since they were starving to death a plastic bag was a good substitute for food. ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/11 "2008-09-20T20:59:57Z")
Ahhhh! ItchyitchyitchyitchygodIfrickinhatepoisionivyitchyitchyitchy :scratching: Uhhhuuhu…owwwwwowowowowow. ---
**Author:** ![Earthworm\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f07891/32.png) [@Earthworm\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthworm_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/12 "2008-09-20T21:23:47Z")
“err-bwa-wha? Yes” In response to “Will you come help me move the kids dresser?” ---
**Author:** ![5-HT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/f19dbf/32.png) [@5-HT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5-HT)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/13 "2008-09-20T21:27:59Z")
“so, um… what’s your name?” ---
**Author:** ![Lucky\_13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucky_13/32/13209_2.png) [@Lucky\_13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucky_13)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/14 "2008-09-20T21:30:11Z")
“OK, Mom… later” in response to a request to sweep the garage in case one of my cousin’s wedding guests pops their head in there, which they have no business doing, but just in case they do. (My cousin is getting married in my folks’ back yard later this afternoon.) ---
**Author:** ![Wakinyan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wakinyan/32/352_2.png) [@Wakinyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wakinyan)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/15 "2008-09-20T21:39:28Z")
“She made breakfast…? Now? - What time is it?” ---
**Author:** ![DJ\_Motorbike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90ced4/32.png) [@DJ\_Motorbike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DJ_Motorbike)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/16 "2008-09-20T21:46:12Z")
I told my car radio to shut up just before changed the station. On Saturdays the public radio station here has this annoying doctor guy with a high-pitched, nasal voice. I can’t understand how someone with such an awful voice got into radio. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/17 "2008-09-20T21:51:02Z")
“You ate that whole loaf of bread last night?” It was a small brown & serve wheat sesame loaf from Schwan’s and it was the main reason I even got out of bed – to slather some butter on a nice thick slice. It was all gone! Husband’s response: “I did? It must have been pretty good.” :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Tabula\_Rasa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a9adbd/32.png) [@Tabula\_Rasa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabula_Rasa)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/18 "2008-09-20T22:23:39Z")
To six-year-old son: “I don’t want a bag of Transformers in my bed.” ---
**Author:** ![JustThinkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f0a364/32.png) [@JustThinkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustThinkin)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/19 "2008-09-20T22:24:42Z")
Go to sleep, Corbi. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477/20 "2008-09-20T22:25:32Z")
Got up about 6:30 and I didn’t say anything this morning. The first thing I said was ‘Hello?’ when the phone rang a bit after one o’clock. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-the-first-words-out-of-your-mouth-this-morning/464477.md?page=2)