# What were they looking for? (possible TMI) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 23, 2005, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388 "2005-11-23T05:22:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/1 "2005-11-23T05:22:52Z")
This could be GQ, but I thought it was probably more mundane than general. Picture it: Late August, 1967. I have just had my 18th birthday, and I have a date with Uncle Sam. About a week before going off to college, I must let my body be examined for medical fitness for the ::shudder:: draft. The beginning - no real surprises. Strip down to shorts, stand in long lines, go off in batches to be examined. The batches of guys are taken over to another part of a large room. They are told to strip off their shorts and drop them between their feet. A doctor will come along and “Turn your head and cough.” Again, no surprises. But then, the instructions were to: “bend over and spread your cheeks with your hands” while the doctor and one or two others go down the back of the line and shine a light up into the revealed orifice. So what were they looking for? Hemorrhoids? Evidence of anal intercourse? Aesthetically unpleasing anuses? I was not fortunate enough to actually participate in this ritual, as I had my doctor interview first, and my asthma got me a 1-Y rating, so I was thereupon deemed unworthy of forced military service and dismissed. But the curiosity lingered, so any military doctors or other knowledgeables are welcome to satisfy same. ---
**Author:** ![lonesome\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c68b51/32.png) [@lonesome\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lonesome_loser)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/2 "2005-11-23T05:48:52Z")
Hernia. ---
**Author:** ![SparrowHawk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac8455/32.png) [@SparrowHawk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SparrowHawk)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/3 "2005-11-23T06:07:07Z")
Pinworms? ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/4 "2005-11-23T06:10:35Z")
> [@lonesome loser](#): > > Hernia. Hernia in the front, yes. Surely not in the back? ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/5 "2005-11-23T06:29:26Z")
Signs of Dinkleberryitis. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/6 "2005-11-23T06:34:50Z")
> [@SparrowHawk](#): > > Pinworms? Well, maybe, but I understood that these worms are not visible externally, except possibly when you are asleep and more, um, relaxed (incident many years ago with very young nephew comes to mind - my sister was a hero with tweezers). ---
**Author:** ![VegemiteMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/df788c/32.png) [@VegemiteMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VegemiteMoose)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/7 "2005-11-23T06:43:16Z")
Flight 19 ---
**Author:** ![Phnord\_Prephect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/df705f/32.png) [@Phnord\_Prephect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phnord_Prephect)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/8 "2005-11-23T07:50:45Z")
Ya know, if I ever needed more reasons NOT to join the service, this solved that problem. Not only the ‘line up and let someone look at your asshole with a flashlight’, even as bad as that is… …but the thought that at some point during my service someone with rank might come to me and say “ok, Phnord, you got a new job. Here’s your flashlight.” ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-were-they-looking-for-possible-tmi/332388/9 "2005-11-23T12:09:42Z")
Corn Drugs An outie rectum. To early for a gerbil check. The best butts to moon the other side. Compatibility with the standard issue instructor’s boot for the training phase. They called it Boot Camp for a reason. They lost an instructor after a recruit screwed up and he was all over their ass.