# What we've got here is a failure to communicate **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 27, 2010, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191 "2010-09-27T06:34:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Polerius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d78d45/32.png) [@Polerius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polerius)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/1 "2010-09-27T06:34:44Z")
After parking my car, I’m walking with someone along the street. When we reach an intersection and turn right onto another street, I look around to find the street sign, so I know which street I parked on. I look around for a bit but I can’t see the sign, so I ask the person I’m with. \*\*Me: \*\*“What street did we park on?” **Person:** “Bla street” **Me:** [Surprised that the person responded so quickly, when I couldn’t see any signs anywhere] “Where is the sign? I can’t see it” **Person:** “What, you don’t trust me? Do you think I’m stupid?” **Me:** “I trust you about what street we are on, it’s just that I can’t for the life of me see the street sign, and I’m curious where it is.” **Person:**"If you don’t trust what I tell you, why do you ask me what street we are on? Questions for the Dope: Was I in the wrong in any way? Was I insulting to the other person by asking where the sign was? Did it help that I clarified why I was asking where the sign was? ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/2 "2010-09-27T06:49:29Z")
> [@Polerius](#): > > After parking my car, I’m walking with someone along the street. When we reach an intersection and turn right onto another street, I look around to find the street sign, so I know which street I parked on. I look around for a bit but I can’t see the sign, so I ask the person I’m with. > > \*\*Me: \*\*“What street did we park on?” > **Person:** “Bla street” > **Me:** [Surprised that the person responded so quickly, when I couldn’t see any signs anywhere] “Where is the sign? I can’t see it” > **Person:** “What, you don’t trust me? Do you think I’m stupid?” > **Me:** “I trust you about what street we are on, it’s just that I can’t for the life of me see the street sign, and I’m curious where it is.” > **Person:**"If you don’t trust what I tell you, why do you ask me what street we are on? > > Questions for the Dope: Was I in the wrong in any way? Was I insulting to the other person by asking where the sign was? Did it help that I clarified why I was asking where the sign was? Well its not unreasonable that your friend thought you were asking to see the sign to verify what he said. Perhaps you could have asked, eh - why are you so clever, I can’t see the sign… ---
**Author:** ![AmunRa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@AmunRa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AmunRa)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/3 "2010-09-27T06:57:35Z")
I would find it strange to not know what street I am parking on before I parked in the first place… Maybe your friend just has a better sense of direction and didn’t need to look at a street sign. ---
**Author:** ![Polerius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d78d45/32.png) [@Polerius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polerius)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/4 "2010-09-27T07:03:40Z")
> [@AmunRa](#): > > I would find it strange to not know what street I am parking on before I parked in the first place We were just driving in some downtown area and looking for a parking spot, and just turned onto a side street where we saw a free space and parked. So, it’s not like we parked at a specific spot we had in mind. > [@](#): > > … Maybe your friend just has a better sense of direction and didn’t need to look at a street sign. Nope. The person saw the sign and that’s how they knew. [FWIW, I eventually saw it too. It was just a different color than what I was expecting.] ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/5 "2010-09-27T07:07:59Z")
Yes, I can see your response as insulting. The proper response would have been ‘thank you’. If you wanted to know where the sign was you should have asked that question. What did you want to know - what street you were on or where the sign was? Nitpick - Martin’s line was, “What we’ve got here is failure to communicate”. No “a”. ---
**Author:** ![Polerius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d78d45/32.png) [@Polerius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polerius)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/6 "2010-09-27T07:21:28Z")
> [@PlainJain](#): > > The proper response would have been ‘thank you’. Agreed. > [@](#): > > If you wanted to know where the sign was you should have asked that question. What did you want to know - what street you were on or where the sign was? I initially wanted to know what street I was on, so I asked and got an answer to that question. Once that was answered, another question arose: where is the sign? So, I asked that question. I guess one mistake was not saying “thanks” between getting the answer to the first question and asking the second question. > [@](#): > > Nitpick - Martin’s line was, “What we’ve got here is failure to communicate”. No “a”. Actually, I checked Wikipedia before I posted this thread, and [it says](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/What_we%27ve_got_here_is_%28a%29_failure_to_communicate) > [@](#): > > There are actually two close variants of the line that are spoken at different points in the film. Nuances of accent, delivery, and intonation aside, they are as follows: > > 1. “What we’ve got here is…failure to communicate.” — spoken by The Captain, the imperious prison warden played by Strother Martin > 2. “What we’ve got here is a failure to communicate.” — spoken by Luke, the reprobate inmate played by Paul Newman near the film’s climax ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/7 "2010-09-27T08:40:58Z")
> [@Polerius](#): > > Actually, I checked Wikipedia before I posted this thread, and… God, I love this place! ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/8 "2010-09-27T09:01:25Z")
I think the bigger problem is that the friend was being so touchy that they would get so upset even if you were trying to verify what was being said. Still, the best way to have asked that question would be “How did you know that?! Was there a sign I missed?” Make it clear that it is about you, not them. ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/9 "2010-09-27T11:09:29Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Still, the best way to have asked that question would be “How did you know that?! Was there a sign I missed?” Make it clear that it is about you, not them. Yup. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 11:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-weve-got-here-is-a-failure-to-communicate/555191/10 "2010-09-27T11:28:52Z")
For what it’s worth, I agree with **Polerius** – his friend seems unusually and unwarrantedly touchy.