# What whimsical taxes would you support? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 13, 2021, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956 "2021-05-13T01:44:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/21 "2021-05-13T18:24:35Z")
Television stations taxed $1000 every time the weekend anchor lady chats more than 5 seconds with the weather guy. Our local weekend girl gets all giddy when she goes on and on about how much she likes the weather, giggling like a schoolgirl. I’m going to wear out my mute button when the weather intro starts. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/22 "2021-05-13T18:34:40Z")
> [@CardboardBoxx](#): > > Extra tax on any company that has 10 or more people in full time positions for the same role without also having part time positions. Extra tax on any company that fills jobs by hiring multiple part-time people, each for just below the number of hours at which the company would have to pay benefits. (Exception if they pay the benefits anyway.) ---
**Author:** ![CardboardBoxx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardboardboxx/32/7079_2.png) [@CardboardBoxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CardboardBoxx)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/23 "2021-05-13T18:39:56Z")
Multiple part time people is good, and should be encouraged. 6 part time workers means 6 people with a good work life balance. 4 full time people means 4 overworked and 2 unemployed. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/24 "2021-05-13T18:45:05Z")
1. You can make an argument for that if you separate benefits entirely out of the picture, either by providing the benefits (pension, health care, paid vacations, etc.) entirely through the governmental level, or by having the employer provide them to part time employees. 2. For those who need full time pay, having to scrounge it up by juggling the hours, commuting time, and other requirements of two or more different jobs is not an advantage, and does not lead to a “good work life balance.” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/25 "2021-05-13T18:46:01Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > Television stations taxed $1000 every time the weekend anchor lady chats more than 5 seconds with the weather guy. Our local weekend girl gets all giddy when she goes on and on about how much she likes the weather, giggling like a schoolgirl. I’m going to wear out my mute button when the weather intro starts. Can I put a rider on your Annoying Chatter Taxation Act (the ACT Act) bill? This would tax any radio station a thousand dollars any time a DJ talks during the intro or any other part of any song. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/26 "2021-05-13T18:48:29Z")
> [@CardboardBoxx](#): > > Multiple part time people is good, and should be encouraged. 6 part time workers means 6 people with a good work life balance. 4 full time people means 4 overworked and 2 unemployed. Most people aren’t going to make enough to live on by working a part time job. They’re either going to have to a full time job or several part time jobs. Of those options, one full time job is generally preferable. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/27 "2021-05-13T18:52:24Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Can I put a rider on your Annoying Chatter Taxation Act (the ACT Act) bill? This would tax any radio station a thousand dollars any time a DJ talks during the intro or any other part of any song. Indeed. And double for Sirius XM and the like. I’m paying for the content, not for chatter. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/28 "2021-05-13T19:09:21Z")
That’l cost you $11,100. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/29 "2021-05-13T19:55:43Z")
A tax on answering “yes or no” type questions with long rambling responses. Say a dollar per word. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/30 "2021-05-13T20:05:26Z")
Flip-flops 100 yards from a beach, pool or gym locker room. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/31 "2021-05-13T20:12:22Z")
A tax on making small talk to a stranger on an airplane. ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/32 "2021-05-13T20:14:00Z")
Dave Barry wrote that all signs which used an extra “e” should be taxed, signs like “Ye Olde Tea Shoppe”. I would add a tax for signs that use “Y” in place of the old letter “thorn”. Commercials that appear more than once during one commercial break – and treble the tax on any commercial that use the words “I’ve fallen…”, “reverse mortgage”, “car insurance”, and “but wait, we’ll DOUBLE the offer”. Any commercial that repeats a telephone “number to call”. Multiply the tax by the number of times the telephone number is repeated. Any commercial for a lawyer that states the amount of a cash settlement pays a special “greed tax”. The commercial must also state how that settlement was split between the lawyer and client. Tax on any business that does not prominently display its address and telephone number, and the numerals must be at least as large as any other numerals/letters that appear on the front of the business (temporary sales signs excepted). ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/33 "2021-05-13T20:30:32Z")
A $10 tax every time someone shares a bull shit platitude that defines them as a person on Facebook. "Humble enough to know I’m far from perfect. Confident enough to know I’m the shit" That’ll be $10 please. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/34 "2021-05-13T20:48:18Z")
$1,000,000 tax on the AKC. Worst thing to happen to dogs. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/35 "2021-05-13T20:49:56Z")
I like the chatter as long as it is: History or interesting trivia about the song or bands, and 2. Never ever over any part of the tune. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/36 "2021-05-13T20:52:12Z")
A fee for every Facebook, Twitter and Instagram re-tweet/post. Force people to think hard about whether they really want to “share” that inanity with the world. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/37 "2021-05-13T23:09:43Z")
$1 tax on any of the following in a Facebook post: 1 Like = 1 Prayer Sadly, 97% won’t share this. I’m proud to be in the 3% Who has the guts to share this? Let that sink in ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/38 "2021-05-13T23:12:29Z")
Taxes on wearing baseball caps sideways if over 18, driving below 20 (km/h) in the snow or below 90 on a highway, spelling your common child’s name with more than one unusual vowel, pausing more than three seconds after the green “left turn” arrow appears, reading fewer than two books a year, yelling at anyone “below you” over a trivial matter more than once a month, using more than two gym machines simultaneously, not throwing your fast food wrappers away in a mall or fast food restaurant, making a prank or unsolicited marketing phone call, using more than six words to describe your coffee preference, using a bad “foreign” accent for “humorous” effect or using the phrase “it’s early days” or the term “customer” in lieu of the phrase “medical patient”. ---
**Author:** ![ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chockfullofheadygoodness/32/511_2.png) [@ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/39 "2021-05-13T23:25:02Z")
$50 tax on leaving a public restroom stall with poop (including poop-encrusted toliet paper wads) still in the bowl or urine on the seat. Refundable if you go back in and clean up your own damn mess. Turd tax waived in the event of a verifiable plumbing problem that wasn’t caused by said turds. ---
**Author:** ![ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chockfullofheadygoodness/32/511_2.png) [@ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2021, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/40 "2021-05-13T23:29:07Z")
$100 per pop for setting off fireworks outside of the ranges July 1 through July 4, inclusive or 11:55 pm December 31 through 12:30 am January 1. USA only. Other jurisdictions may have their own time ranges. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956.md?page=3)