# What whimsical taxes would you support? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 13, 2021, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956 "2021-05-13T01:44:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Die\_Capacitrix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/die_capacitrix/32/9_2.png) [@Die\_Capacitrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Die_Capacitrix)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2021, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/61 "2021-05-16T07:31:42Z")
> [@thorny\_locust](#): > > Making or using things that beep. Putting lights on everything. Every single room in my house, except the bathrooms, has a light on 24/7. Lights on the outlet strips, speakers, etc. Tax on the word, “Nonetheless”. It means you’re going to talk twice as much about a subject, because first the person explains all the things they should do, and then they spend an equal amount of time explaining why they won’t do it, and at the end, do absolutely nothing. Tax on neighbors that complain about your yard, if it’s neat and tidy. Neighbor doesn’t pay for any of the upkeep, so if I choose to keep a hedge, that’s my choice. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2021, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/62 "2021-05-16T15:08:27Z")
I’d slap a 10% gross revenues tax on any company that features national monuments or parks in its ads.\* Yes, I’m pissed off at Liberty Mutual for prostituting the Statue of Liberty in its endless annoying ads. Oh, and a similar revenue tax on any company that promotes its “non-GMO” products for which no GMO alternatives exist. \*proceeds to go to upkeep of the monuments and parks. ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2021, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/63 "2021-05-17T19:04:20Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Oh, and a similar revenue tax on any company that promotes its “non-GMO” products for which no GMO alternatives exist. Can we apply this to grocery stores that label their steaks and roasts “gluten-free”? ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2021, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/64 "2021-05-17T21:35:25Z")
Like every chicken company that puts in big letters - “No growth hormones”, then at FDA insistence has an asterisk and smaller letters on the back saying “It’s illegal to put growth hormones in chickens” In other words they’re trumpeting in big bold type > We actually comply with the law! Imagine that?! > At least until they catch us doing otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![Esprise\_Me](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprise_me/32/2947_2.png) [@Esprise\_Me](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprise_Me)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2021, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/65 "2021-05-18T16:53:49Z")
Complaining about millennials/young people. A penny the first time, doubling every time thereafter. Some folks are going to have to un-retire. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2021, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/66 "2021-05-18T17:01:55Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I have no problem with bounties on beagle owners either. It’s time we end Charlie Brown’s reign of terror. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2021, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/67 "2021-05-18T17:04:04Z")
> [@Esprise\_Me](#): > > Complaining about millennials/young people. A penny the first time, doubling every time thereafter. Same for “Boomers”. In fact, any stereotyping/scapegoating of people on the basis of vague generational attributes should have an appropriate penalty - like a day in the stocks within range of overripe vegetables. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2021, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/68 "2021-05-18T17:10:15Z")
> [@Die\_Capacitrix](#): > > Tax on the word, “Nonetheless”. It means you’re going to talk twice as much about a subject, because first the person explains all the things they should do, and then they spend an equal amount of time explaining why they won’t do it, and at the end, do absolutely nothing. I disagree. I feel the word nonetheless serves a useful purpose in communications. It indicates that a person proposing a course of action is already aware of the argument that can be made against their proposal. _“I know many businesses will suffer economically due to the social distancing requirements we have enacted. Nonetheless, these economic hardships are outweighed by the greater concern for the lives that would be lost without these requirements.”_ ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2021, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/69 "2021-05-20T05:06:17Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Same for “Boomers”. > > In fact, any stereotyping/scapegoating of people on the basis of vague generational attributes should have an appropriate penalty - like a day in the stocks within range of overripe vegetables. Except for Gen X. You can say anything you want about Gen X. We’re like Honey Badgers - we simply don’t give a fuck what anyone says about us. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2021, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/70 "2021-05-20T05:22:37Z")
We’re not old enough to fit the “old fools” stereotype, and we’re too old to fit the “young fools” stereotype. Our day will of course come… ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2021, 9:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/71 "2021-05-20T09:49:57Z")
A tax on anyone online or in person who immediately tries to weasel their way out of or intentionally tried to dispute a hypothetical question. “Who would you save from an immediately collapsing bridge, a newborn baby or an adult doctor?” “Well I don’t think I’ll ever be in that scenario, and if I did I’d try to save both of them” ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2021, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/72 "2021-05-20T13:26:56Z")
That’s a silly complaint about messageboard behavior. Nobody does that! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2021, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/73 "2021-05-20T13:42:42Z")
> [@Bonum\_Legatum](#): > > Any commercial that repeats a telephone “number to call”. Multiply the tax by the number of times the telephone number is repeated. Multiply the tax by 1000 if the number is repeated multiple times at the end of the commercial, separated by “that’s”, while simultaneously appearing on the screen, to provide maximum opportunity for the information to be processed by the extremely slow-witted. This is a certain red flag for a rip-off on shoddy products or services, if not outright scams. ---
**Author:** ![MikeF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@MikeF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeF)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2021, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/74 "2021-05-27T15:22:24Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > People who “multitask” on the phone while watching a movie with you- $1 per “What happened/what did they say” and $2 per “rewind it-I missed that scene”. This. 1000x, this. I can almost guarantee the first of many, “Can you back it up?” will occur in the first minute. ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2021, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/75 "2021-05-27T17:14:23Z")
I’d tax people for saying “at the end of the day” before summarizing, when “so” would do. It would still be OK to use the phrase to refer to an actual schedule time. $100 feels about right, with the proviso that it goes to a benevolent government function such as helping impoverished persons gain education. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/76 "2021-05-28T09:27:50Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > Indeed. And double for Sirius XM and the like. I’m paying for the content, not for chatter. The chatter is part of the content. Surely they have music only stations? ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/77 "2021-05-28T10:30:38Z")
$1,000 tax every time a website forces me to watch an ad before showing me the video I want to see, but then never shows me the video due to some technical glitch. $500 to me, and $500 to their biggest competitor. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/78 "2021-05-28T11:23:30Z")
$100 per minute of time wasted on staff meetings by anyone rambling just to hear the sound of their voice. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2021, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/79 "2021-05-28T12:04:56Z")
> [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](#): > > > [@BobLibDem](#): > > > > Indeed. And double for Sirius XM and the like. I’m paying for the content, not for chatter. > > The chatter is part of the content. Surely they have music only stations? I find the classical stations have little chatter as does Bluesville, but 60s on 6 and 70s on 7 can have way too much yakking, depending on the DJ at the time. ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2021, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956/80 "2021-05-30T18:38:55Z")
Special tax for any advertisement like this: In big letters: INTERNET $20 PER MONTH. Then in the fine print — taxes, equipment, installation etc. etc, etc. are all extra. Oh yes, and the offer is only for the first year. The tax would be the difference between the “big letter” price and the real price. Could be rescinded if in equally big letters - the offer explains what 75% of the customers are actually paying. If necessary, amortize equipment and installation costs over the first year. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-whimsical-taxes-would-you-support/941956.md?page=3)