# What will it goddamn, assdicking, motherfucking take to wake my sorry groggy ass up? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 24, 2003, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-it-goddamn-assdicking-motherfucking-take-to-wake-my-sorry-groggy-ass-up/203450 "2003-09-24T01:57:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2003, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-it-goddamn-assdicking-motherfucking-take-to-wake-my-sorry-groggy-ass-up/203450/41 "2003-09-26T23:35:51Z")
Music, even loud and or bad music, simply won’t wake some people up. If you’re one of those people, you need to use an alarm. When choosing an alarm, get one that makes a noise that is unusual for your environment. Don’t get one that sounds like the microwave, for example, or the telephone if you don’t answer the phone. (Though some people are well trained to jump at the sound of the phone, so a phone sounding alarm is perfect.) Telling you to get more sleep may be “obvious,” but many people simply stay up later than they should–not because they have any sleep disorders, but because they choose to stay up late. Force yourself to go to bed in time to get 8 hours of sleep. Some people also have extraordinarily good internal clocks. I used to be able to look at the clock, repeat to myself the time it displayed, and tell myself to wake up at a certain time. It worked. Your brain may be telling you, “You know, 6:25 worked just fine last time.” You can try changing the time on your bedside clock. Make it an hour fast. If you wake up in the night, you probably won’t remember it’s an hour fast, and you might mentally adjust to the advanced hour. I’ve always had a lot of difficulty getting out of bed in the morning, and most of it is my fault. I stay up too late for my own good. I know I need a lot of sleep, but sometimes I ignore that fact. Julie ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-it-goddamn-assdicking-motherfucking-take-to-wake-my-sorry-groggy-ass-up/203450/42 "2003-09-27T00:07:26Z")
> [@](#): > > Sometimes getting to bed earlier isn’t the answer. And sometimes it is, and I don’t believe anyone said it _always_ was the answer. Other things that may work – note the use of the word _may_ – are to put yourself on a set sleep schedule (always going to bed at the same time, and waking up at the same time) and to raise the blinds/open the curtains in your room before you go to sleep, so the sun comes in in the morning. Both _may_ make it easier to get up, since your body can be accustomed to a particular sleep habit and since sunlight prompts wakefulness. It’s also worth keeping in mind that _too much_ sleep can also make you logy and lethargic, so sleeping 15 hours a night is probably not a good idea either. And anyone who wants to call me “Captain Obvious” for these suggestions is invited to kiss my ass. ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-it-goddamn-assdicking-motherfucking-take-to-wake-my-sorry-groggy-ass-up/203450/43 "2003-09-27T00:23:39Z")
[Provigil](http://www.cnn.com/2003/HEALTH/09/24/awake.pill.reut/). As soon as you open your eyes pop one and you will very shortly be alert & awake, and not in coke/meth junkie way. It seems to be less damaging then coffee or aspirin and is apparently incredibly effective. > [@](#): > > In trials on healthy people like Army helicopter pilots, modafinil has allowed humans to stay up safely for almost two days while remaining practically as focused, alert, and capable of dealing with complex problems as the well-rested. Then, after a good eight hours’ sleep, they can get up and do it again – for another 40 hours, before finally catching up on their sleep. DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2003, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-it-goddamn-assdicking-motherfucking-take-to-wake-my-sorry-groggy-ass-up/203450/44 "2003-09-27T01:27:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jodi \* > \*\*Both _may_ make it easier to get up, since your body can be accustomed to a particular sleep habit and since sunlight prompts wakefulness. \*\* That reminds me of these alarm lights you can get. They get brighter and brighter in the morning so that you wake up in a “natural” way. And the point about keeping to a regular schedule is an excellent one. It’s “obvious” to me that these things work, cap’n! Julie [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-it-goddamn-assdicking-motherfucking-take-to-wake-my-sorry-groggy-ass-up/203450.md?page=2)