# What will the Washington Football Team's new name be on 2 February 2022? **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Tags:** football-nfl\ **Created:** [January 4, 2022, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231 "2022-01-04T23:54:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/201 "2022-02-02T17:02:41Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > MLB teams names work for MLB. Birds (Cardinals, Orioles, Blue Jays) Of course, there are more birds in the NFL than in MLB: Cardinals, Eagles, Ravens, Falcons. > [@RickJay](#): > > odd connections to team history (Dodgers, Giants, Red Sox, Reds) The NFL has at least one of those as well, in the Cleveland Browns. > [@RickJay](#): > > things connected to the city (Padres, Phillies, Marlins, Rockies) In the NFL, there are also things connected to the city: Packers, Steelers, Vikings, Saints. I’m not sure I see much of a difference between baseball team nicknames and football team nicknames, particularly when there are crossovers like the Cardinals and Giants. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/202 "2022-02-02T17:04:27Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > Of course, there are more birds in the NFL than in MLB: Cardinals, Eagles, Ravens, Falcons. Seahawks. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/203 "2022-02-02T17:04:29Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > Cardinals, Eagles, Ravens, Falcons. And Seahawks. ETA: Hawkninja’d! ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/204 "2022-02-02T17:08:11Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > Seahawks. Of course, also the Seahawks! My bad. ---
**Author:** ![dirtball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dirtball/32/18772_2.png) [@dirtball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dirtball)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/205 "2022-02-02T17:11:32Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > > [@dirtball](#): > > > > I just think the best names convey the idea of some quality that would make the team a formidable opponent. > > I think the best ones are ones the fan base can go a little all out for. The Raiders being the perfect example. Sure. I’d also suggest that Raiders fits my little naming scheme as well. Of course, we don’t know how events would have played out if, back in 1960, the owner had said, “We’re going to call the team the Oakland Mewling Kittens.” (Maybe as the result of suddenly suffering a stroke or something; I don’t know.) ---
**Author:** ![Akaj](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/akaj/32/145_2.png) [@Akaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Akaj)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/206 "2022-02-02T17:32:48Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > > [@solost](#): > > > > I find it boringly generic, and even worse is the logo-- which apparently is just the name “Commanders” in a heavy condensed yellow Impact-style font with yellow bars on top and bottom (I was going to link to the new logo but apparently its so new I couldn’t find an image). > > The helmet logo is going to be just a stylized W (and appears to be a variation of the W which was being used for the Washington Football Team). > > But, yeah, the “word logo” (in the background of the picture below) is highly generic. > > [https://www.gannett-cdn.com/presto/2022/02/02/USAT/7828e306-c1d1-4e54-adfc-daa8b874f491-AP\_Washington\_Commanders\_1.jpg?crop=5566,3131,x0,y0&width=3200&height=1801&format=pjpg&auto=webp](https://www.gannett-cdn.com/presto/2022/02/02/USAT/7828e306-c1d1-4e54-adfc-daa8b874f491-AP_Washington_Commanders_1.jpg?crop=5566,3131,x0,y0&width=3200&height=1801&format=pjpg&auto=webp) Seriously lame design. Like owner’s-nephew bad. ---
**Author:** ![lum\_s\_husband](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lum_s_husband/32/3698_2.png) [@lum\_s\_husband](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lum_s_husband)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/207 "2022-02-02T17:35:40Z")
The Bureaucrats would inspire fear and loathing. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/208 "2022-02-02T17:36:31Z")
Manager title- Commander In Chief? ---
**Author:** ![Tabco](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tabco/32/7644_2.png) [@Tabco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabco)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/209 "2022-02-02T17:40:15Z")
That letter C in the Commanders wordmark is giving me Pac Man vibes. ---
**Author:** ![Briny\_Deep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/briny_deep/32/17188_2.png) [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/210 "2022-02-02T17:41:54Z")
Commodores? [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/FrkEDe6Ljqs/maxresdefault.jpg "Commodores - Nightshift (Official Music Video)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrkEDe6Ljqs) ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/211 "2022-02-02T17:44:03Z")
> [@Akaj](#): > > Seriously lame design. Like owner’s-nephew bad. I am reminded of this: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/jVhlJNJopOQ/maxresdefault.jpg "Papyrus - SNL") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVhlJNJopOQ) ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/212 "2022-02-02T17:58:30Z")
I’ve done thought experiments based on how fierce a team’s mascot is. Here are my thoughts, and I’m ranking them in tiers because I consider some to be about the same. Tier 1: Titans. The titans in Greek mythology were the ones who gave birth to the gods. They are immortal, unkillable (though most were cast into Tartarus, basically a cosmic jail) with unrivaled power. It’s hard to get more powerful than this. Tier 2: Jets. A jet can deliver a nuke to blow up any other mascot except the titan. I’m sure a nuke would hurt a titan, but it would recover. Tier 3: Giants. A giant could step on, and/or eat any other mascot, except the jet that can keep out of its reach and can nuke it, and the titan that’s just too powerful (and potentially just as big). Tier 4: Armed people. Anyone who presumably is carrying a firearm and can shoot someone goes in this tier. This includes the Cowboys, Texans (any good red-blooded Texan walks around armed), Raiders (though this might be an older firearm), Bills (though they have a buffalo logo, the team is named after Buffalo Bill, an armed cowboy), Buccaneers (same as Raiders), Patriots, and the new Commanders (I presume they are military commanders who are armed). Chiefs and Vikings aren’t in this category, and neither would the old Redskins, because they would be armed with weapons the predate firearms. Tier 5: Big, predatory animals. Bears, Bengals, Lions, Jaguars, and Panthers all fit here. Tier 6: Vikings and Chiefs. On their own, not able to stand against a predatory animal, but with ancient weapons and warrior training they can take on anything in the lower tiers. Tier 7: Bigger animals that aren’t predatory, but potentially dangerous. Broncos, Colts, Rams, and Chargers (which a nebulous name but it was originally named after a warhorse and had a horse in the team’s first logo). I considered putting the Colts in a lower tier since they are young horses, but the actual size/age where a horse stops being a colt is a bit arbitrary, and the term can apply to fully-grown horses. Tier 8: I put the Saints just above regular humans because they presumably have holy powers of some sort? That’s debatable. Tier 9: Normal people who aren’t particularly combat-worthy. Packers, Steelers, 49ers, and Browns. (I considered putting the Browns in a lower category because they were named after an old guy, but he was athletic when younger and was good at the pole vault and played QB in high school and college.) Tier 10: Dolphins. The smaller animals can’t touch a dolphin, but a dolphin on its own isn’t much of a threat either. I put it here because anything in higher tiers is a loss, anything in lower tiers is probably a stalemate. Tier 11: Fierce birds. Falcons, Eagles, and Seahawks (not a fictional bird as some suggest, seahawk is another name for the osprey, a large raptor that eats fish). Tier 12: Small birds. Ravens and Cardinals. Keep in mind, all of the above is just a silly exercise and meaningless. And clearly a waste of time on my part. It also doesn’t represent how much I like each mascot. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/213 "2022-02-02T18:00:22Z")
Here’s why I actually LOVE the name Commanders: It will finally bring an end to the mind-numbingly annoying attempted puns, half-hearted DC bureaucracy jokes, and lame WFT whining that are made each and every time the football team located in Washington DC has been mentioned for the past two years. ---
**Author:** ![lum\_s\_husband](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lum_s_husband/32/3698_2.png) [@lum\_s\_husband](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lum_s_husband)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/214 "2022-02-02T18:07:05Z")
“Commoners” ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/215 "2022-02-02T18:11:23Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > just things connected to the city It’s ironic you say this and decry the Cleveland Guardians, which is a thing connected to the city (and really no worse than the Phillies or Marlins). ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/216 "2022-02-02T18:12:23Z")
> [@ShadowFacts](#): > > See: Ravens, Baltimore. Ravens is an amazing name for a team from Baltimore ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/217 "2022-02-02T18:14:47Z")
Dude! That gave me a flashback: > **[Communist Mutants from Space](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Communist_Mutants_from_Space)** > > Pages for logged out editors learn more > Communist Mutants from Space is a fixed shooter video game programmed by Stephen H. Landrum for the Atari 2600 with the Starpath Supercharger cassette accessory. It was published in 1982 by Starpath (formerly Arcadia). The game is similar to Galaxian, adding a variety of gameplay-changing options. > Aliens from the communist planet of Rooskee are invading peaceful, democratic planets and turning their inhabitants into "Communist Mutants." The commun... AFAIK it was not available for the Commodore 64. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/218 "2022-02-02T18:34:19Z")
While it is good news that the new name has been chosen, I would still like to emphasize that Dan Snyder and his leadership group shouldn’t get credit for doing something good. He was forced to do it, after decades of swearing he would never do it. So, even now, fuck him. > **[Opinion | A new Washington Football Team name feels hollow to us Native people](https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2022/01/31/native-americans-disappointed-washington-football-name/)** > > How are we supposed to cheer for something that should have happened decades ago? ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/219 "2022-02-02T18:48:51Z")
> [@ISiddiqui](#): > > It’s ironic you say this and decry the Cleveland Guardians, which is a thing connected to the city (and really no worse than the Phillies or Marlins). I do know of the connection. The problem is that it SOUNDS generic. It’s like saying “New York Rivers” or something; I mean, New York City has rather important rivers, but so do a lot of places. A good city connection is preferably something unusual, like San Diego Padres or, if you want to go out of baseball, Green Bay Packers or Calgary Stampeders. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2022, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231/220 "2022-02-02T18:53:14Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > While it is good news that the new name has been chosen, I would still like to emphasize that Dan Snyder and his leadership group shouldn’t get credit for doing something good. He was forced to do it, after decades of swearing he would never do it. So, even now, fuck him. I don’t understand why they should have ever gotten any credit for it, even had they done it 40 years ago of their own accord. Just doing the right thing is not something an adult needs, or should want, credit for. In fact, when I was in high school from 1985 to 1990, by high school team’s nickname was originally Redskins. We were the Regiopolis-Notre Dame Redskins. In 1987, in accordance with some reference to something the Pope had said about indigenous people deserving justice (it was a Catholic school of course) they decided the nickname was unacceptable and changed it to Panthers. The school, so far as I recall, made no huge self-congratulatory public announcement and sought no moral credit. They just changed it, told everyone involved the new nickname at a school assembly (and explained why the other possible new names lost out) and that was that. That’s what adults do. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-will-the-washington-football-teams-new-name-be-on-2-february-2022/957231.md?page=12)