# What words do you or people you know substitute for obscenities and blasphemies? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 24, 2019, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137 "2019-02-24T23:02:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![sps49sd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@sps49sd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sps49sd)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/21 "2019-02-25T04:32:40Z")
> [@CoastalMaineiac](#): > > It’s been a while since I was in Spanish class, but I think the number fourteen, _en español_, is _catorce_. Quatorze? ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/22 "2019-02-25T05:42:13Z")
> [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](#): > > Bloody Hell (I know in England this is a Thing Not To Be Said), but since I use it in America, not so much. :dubious: Someone’s been having a lend of you, mate. Unless you’re talking England in 1800 or so. You certainly would have given Jane Austen a fainting fit. Frick and Freak are my f-words of choice, but Frack is climbing the charts, since it refers to an unpleasant thing that I frequently wish to be rude about (quite apart from any geeky Trek references ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/23 "2019-02-25T06:44:18Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I used to work with a woman who, if she got frustrated, would say, “Oh, dirty words!” She taught herself to do that when her kids were young. > > Works for me, too! As a Watergate-era kid the first “swear word” I really remember learning was “expletive deleted”. Still use it. Nowadays I find that a quiet, distinctly articulated _“How provoking”_ or _“Oh, for heavens’ sake”_ in response to severe pain or frustration actually scares people more than a bellowed _“FUUUUUUUUUCK”_ or _“GODDAMMIT!!!”_. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/24 "2019-02-25T07:00:28Z")
Muffinfudger. Son of a bachelor. Corksoaker. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/25 "2019-02-25T07:14:48Z")
> [@Jonathan\_Chance](#): > > I am a champion cusser, I admit. But pop culture has gotten its rotten little hooks in me. > > “Holy motherforking shirtballs.” I use The Good Place non-swears sometimes, now, too. Also, how could I have forgotten that I’ll also use the immortal not-really-swear words of Roman Maroni in _Johnny Dangerously_: “Bastidges! Farging iceholes!” ---
**Author:** ![Dereknocue67](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6de8d8/32.png) [@Dereknocue67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dereknocue67)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/26 "2019-02-25T08:44:00Z")
I accept no substitutes. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 8:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/27 "2019-02-25T08:54:47Z")
Muscovy duck ---
**Author:** ![Sangahyando](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f14d63/32.png) [@Sangahyando](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sangahyando)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/28 "2019-02-25T09:22:48Z")
**Littleman** offers “darn”. I went to a super-religious (Protestant-type) preparatory school. Aged 11, and “thinking no harm”, I described something to the matron there, who supervised our welfare, as “a darn shame”. She was as horrified as if I had let loose a copious stream of the vilest effing-and-blinding; and rebuked me accordingly. > [@Aspidistra](#): > > :dubious: Someone’s been having a lend of you, mate. Unless you’re talking England in 1800 or so. You certainly would have given Jane Austen a fainting fit. I’m not so sure – I get the impression that Jane was a tough cookie in her way. She had a couple of brothers who were naval officers; who would, for certain, have been well-acquainted with a wide range of colourful language, via their crews. I wouldn’t be totally surprised to find that Ms. A. had, from that source, a grand foul-language vocabulary – which she quite possibly used when the occasion was appropriate. Do “bad words” in – relatively obscure – foreign languages count as “substitutes”? I’m rather fond of, and sometimes use, the Finnish word for “devils”; which English word would seem fairly mild – but apparently, in Finnish the word is a serious “swear”. The word is “perkele” (you can roll the “r” as extravagantly and lengthily as you like). ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/29 "2019-02-25T10:19:29Z")
There’s a guy at work who always says “dad blast” instead of taking his lords name in vain, “effen” instead of the F word, and “snap” instead of the word for excrement. He does this a lot. It’s irritating and the rest of us wish he’d knock that god damn fucking shit off!:mad: ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/30 "2019-02-25T10:27:48Z")
Bingdoogit! ---
**Author:** ![Wrenching\_Spanners](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecb155/32.png) [@Wrenching\_Spanners](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wrenching_Spanners)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/31 "2019-02-25T11:37:11Z")
Fiddlesticks, bugger, freak or freakin’, and occasionally flip are all cursing substitutes for me. One of my wife’s is See You Next Tuesday - say the first two words out loud and you can see where it goes. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/32 "2019-02-25T12:03:55Z")
When circumstances lead to the need to use an expletive, but surroundings and company proscribe the use of the profane, my go to phrase is “exploding rainbow unicorn poop and glitter farts” gets the point across, and usually a chuckle as well which helps with whatever the stress is. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/33 "2019-02-25T12:22:25Z")
Jeez Louise! Razzenfratz! Crap on a cracker! I’ve got a 10-month old granddaughter, so it’s time I work on baby-friendly cusses, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![as\_u\_wish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6f9a4e/32.png) [@as\_u\_wish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/as_u_wish)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/34 "2019-02-25T13:06:58Z")
“F” words: Phooey, fiddlesticks, fudgsicle. “G” words: Good gravy, goodness sake Most frequent - expletive Really annoyed polysyllabic words: “I wish that hadn’t happened” - the tone of voice makes it very clear what emotion I am expressing… ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/35 "2019-02-25T13:58:40Z")
> [@Jonathan\_Chance](#): > > I am a champion cusser, I admit. But pop culture has gotten its rotten little hooks in me. > > “Holy motherforking shirtballs.” I’ve actually find myself now borrowing a lot from “Johnny Dangerously” ------ cork-soakers, ice-holes, and bastiges. Done with the appropriate bad accent of course. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/36 "2019-02-25T14:05:49Z")
Smucking. Just kidding, [no one would actually say something that lame](https://www.amazon.com/Liseys-Story-Stephen-First-Hardcover/dp/B00JTYXHY4/ref=sr_1_3?crid=100VHUVSZL98E&keywords=liseys+story+stephen+king&qid=1551103423&s=gateway&sprefix=liseys%2Caps%2C139&sr=8-3). I did pick up use of the word “Jebus” from Homer Simpson. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/37 "2019-02-25T14:31:39Z")
Bucket and utterly. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/38 "2019-02-25T15:05:49Z")
Yeah, Maroni from _Johnny Dangerously_ is always good for not-quite-dirty words. I also use: “Freakin’” “Rassenfrassin’” (Yosemite Sam, more or less) “Goldurn it” or “Dadgum it” (said with appropriate hillbilly accent) ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/39 "2019-02-25T15:38:39Z")
I was showing my daughter some pictures of baby bunnies I found in my yard this weekend, and she said that she hoped my dogs wouldn’t get them. I reassured her that El-ahrairah was watching over them, and she responded, “Hraka.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2019, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137/40 "2019-02-25T16:01:46Z")
The ones that I can think of that are real euphemisms that I use regularly (in semi-polite company) are: Holy Moly Jeez Louise Goldarn Dadgum Dadburn sumbit (more of an elision than a euphemism) freakin’ God bless America More jokingly: Criminy Cor Blimey Bloody 'ell My SO’s parents are British and still view the use of _Bloody_ as somewhat offensive. Mom will mildly rebuke Dad for saying it in public. They are in their 70s and 80s and have been in Texas for going on fifty years, so their use of British English may be somewhat ossified. But it appears that, in some circles, _bloody_ was considered an expletive into at least the late 20th century. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-words-do-you-or-people-you-know-substitute-for-obscenities-and-blasphemies/830137.md?page=3)