# What would an office staffed solely by Dopers be like? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 25, 2007, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364 "2007-01-25T02:41:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/41 "2007-01-25T20:42:30Z")
[QUOTE=Madd Maxx] and our bathrooms would be split up into Toilet Paper Over the Top and Toilet Paper Down the Back. [/QUOTE] Either way, **swampbear** would make sure one entire storeroom was filled with rolls, so we don’t run out. And you know that the email wouldn’t be clogged with the glurge and Snopes-able crap that Pat from HR always sends out. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/42 "2007-01-25T20:57:55Z")
[QUOTE=Larry Mudd] Fffft. Doesn’t my lunchbreak seem dreary, all of a sudden? Waitaminute… is **Weirddave** safely assigned to the Tuktoyaktuk branch? He’s an awful lot bigger than I am. :eek: [/QUOTE] Nah, don’t worry about it. He’d be too busy arguing with someone in marketing. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/43 "2007-01-25T20:59:32Z")
[QUOTE=BiblioCat] **Some** people would be too busy doing yoga in the hallways to do any real work. But that’d be okay - it would part of the company health plan. [/QUOTE] [Guess which one is **Bibliocat**?](http://www.nataliedee.com/111705/not-that-good-at-yoga.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/44 "2007-01-25T21:17:44Z")
[QUOTE=GingerOfTheNorth] [Guess which one is **Bibliocat**?](http://www.nataliedee.com/111705/not-that-good-at-yoga.jpg) [/QUOTE] 😃 I’m the potty-mouthed brunette on the right, of course. You’re the red-headed Yoga Queen on the left. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/45 "2007-01-25T21:37:14Z")
[QUOTE=Sean Factotum] Either way, **swampbear** would make sure one entire storeroom was filled with rolls, so we don’t run out. And you know that the email wouldn’t be clogged with the glurge and Snopes-able crap that Pat from HR always sends out. [/QUOTE] Dang right! Plus, storeroom, hell, there’d be at least two warehouses devoted solely to toilet paper. There is _never_ any excuse to run out of toilet paper. [sub]Damn, now everybody knows about my obsessive-compulsive need for plenty of toilet paper[/sub] Like I care. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/46 "2007-01-25T21:38:10Z")
[QUOTE=Misnomer] Very true, but that would only distract all of us for a week or two. 😃 [/quote] Not necessarily. We’re _Dopers_. In the middle of things, in the heat of passion, we’ll suddenly freeze and exclaim, “I suddenly know how to solve the iteration problem on the Foobar project!” The more expert of us won’t even need to stop. 😃 > [@Misnomer](#): > > Good thing this place has a handful of technical writers/editors. 😉 Many of whom can use power tools. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2007, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/47 "2007-01-25T22:28:48Z")
[QUOTE=GingerOfTheNorth] [Guess which one is **Bibliocat**?](http://www.nataliedee.com/111705/not-that-good-at-yoga.jpg) [/QUOTE] Yesterday I thought about how much I liked the demonstration cartoons, and that I’d have to start people using them again. That was a good one. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/48 "2007-01-26T00:08:59Z")
R&D would spend the entire budget building a rolling runway. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/49 "2007-01-26T01:01:58Z")
[QUOTE=Rysdad] R&D would spend the entire budget building a rolling runway. [/QUOTE] For the record, you are cracking my shit right up lately. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![lizardling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f4b2a3/32.png) [@lizardling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lizardling)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/50 "2007-01-26T01:19:49Z")
[QUOTE=Sage Rat] Ditto. If I didn’t read the SDMB, I would have to come up with a new way to take longer. What a cruel, cruel office place this would be! 🆒 [/QUOTE] Ditto three. I do a lot of that and yet I can manage to drive multiple major projects and the usual workload at the same time. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/51 "2007-01-26T02:42:06Z")
The IT department would kick major ass if it weren’t for the daily brawls over PC vs Mac vs Linux. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/52 "2007-01-26T02:44:58Z")
[QUOTE=Chefguy] The IT department would kick major ass if it weren’t for the daily brawls over PC vs Mac vs Linux. [/QUOTE] Brawls? The answer is obvious! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/53 "2007-01-26T03:13:31Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] Brawls? The answer is obvious! 😃 [/QUOTE] Hell, yes it’s obvious. The only winner is BEER IN THE BREAK ROOM! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/54 "2007-01-26T04:09:14Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] I\Check out [**featherlou** ’s new outfit!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=405416) She is one brave lady to wear that to a board meeting! \ [/QUOTE] Hey, I may be from Saskatchewan, but I totally don’t wear that! It would be way too cold. 😃 **The Straight Dope Enterprises dress code** - sure. If you feel like it. If not, that’s okay too. No putting fancy bonnets on the goats. Do whatever you want to the squid. He can look out for himself. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/55 "2007-01-26T04:11:34Z")
We’d have to have a Pet Day Care for all our kitties and puppies… The only down side to this Doper Office - to whom would we rant about our cow-orkers? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/56 "2007-01-26T04:12:28Z")
Can we have a room full of heated, massaging armchairs for us armchair psychologists? We can just sit around getting heated massages all day, giving people free advice (and worth every penny) like a bunch of gurus. Sweet. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/57 "2007-01-26T04:13:31Z")
[QUOTE=anyrose] \The only down side to this Doper Office - to whom would we rant about our cow-orkers? [/QUOTE] We would need a Pit - a ball pit. Where we can call out our co-workers. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/58 "2007-01-26T06:36:35Z")
I’d wager that Tuesday and Thursday mornings would be largely unproductive due to time spent discussing plot details from **24** and **Lost**. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/59 "2007-01-26T06:54:56Z")
Shit man, I want in on this office. The Ball Pit is a splendid idea. Sign me up for R&D, Theoretical Division. [sub]And Wednesday morning is our House discussion.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/60 "2007-01-26T08:47:28Z")
I’d like QA, please. Not so much the “picking apart what other people do”, since we have people here who are much better at that than me; the part about writing procedures that Make Sense. Or translations, I can do translations. Or translation QA. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364.md?page=4)