# What would an office staffed solely by Dopers be like? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 25, 2007, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364 "2007-01-25T02:41:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/61 "2007-01-26T13:09:47Z")
An office filled with independent, opinionated folks with a tendency towards Questioning Everything? It’d be hell on the poor devil who got the job of Supervisor (it’d be worse than herding cats) but entertaining as hell to be a co-employee, I think. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2007, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/62 "2007-01-26T13:14:55Z")
Since so many of us are motivated and self starters, we wouldn’t really need supervisors. Just regualr meetings to make sure we’re all on the same page, productivity-wise. We be an omigarchy - we’d all be in charge 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/63 "2007-01-27T00:38:42Z")
[QUOTE=Chefguy] No actual work would get done, as all inhabitants would spend all their time researching cites such as arcane references to the correct Celtic origin of the word “the”. [/QUOTE] :dubious: Old English, dammit! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/64 "2007-01-27T00:42:04Z")
It would really depend on what **kind** of office it was. E.g., if it were _The New Yorker’s_ fact-checking department . . . ---
**Author:** ![FRDE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e68b1a/32.png) [@FRDE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FRDE)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/65 "2007-01-27T13:30:58Z")
[QUOTE=BrainGlutton] :dubious: Old English, dammit! [/QUOTE] Or should that be Anglo-Saxon ? ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/66 "2007-01-28T01:11:13Z")
Germanic. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2007, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/67 "2007-02-01T18:30:15Z")
I think I would be needed to head HR. Becuase if there’s one thing I know about Dopers, it’s that they LUUUUUURRRRVVVEEE to fire people. So to prevent to much attrition, my job would be to refuse to allow Dopers to fire one another. Because if left to themselves, they’d be going at it like a circular firing squad. I’d enjoy that. ---
**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2007, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/68 "2007-02-01T19:25:48Z")
I’ll bet you would. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2007, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/69 "2007-02-01T20:03:20Z")
[QUOTE=Evil Captor] I think I would be needed to head HR. Becuase if there’s one thing I know about Dopers, it’s that they LUUUUUURRRRVVVEEE to fire people. So to prevent to much attrition, my job would be to refuse to allow Dopers to fire one another. Because if left to themselves, they’d be going at it like a circular firing squad. I’d enjoy that. [/QUOTE] Heh - “You can’t fire me - **I** fire **YOU**!” Ah, that’d be the life, firing each other all day long… ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2007, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/70 "2007-02-01T21:06:26Z")
Heck, just pulling into the parking lot each morning would be an enriching experience because everyone will be using their blinkers, observing all the posted warnings and never taking more than one space in their gas effecient cars. Plus, if it’s raining they’d prolly want to share umbrellas. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2007, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/71 "2007-02-01T23:06:21Z")
[QUOTE=swampbear] Dang right! Plus, storeroom, hell, there’d be at least two warehouses devoted solely to toilet paper. There is _never_ any excuse to run out of toilet paper. [/QUOTE] But who decides whether it goes up and over or down and under? The best part would be being able to talk in board lingo and shorthand without having to think about it. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2007, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/72 "2007-02-01T23:26:49Z")
Batman would always be prepared…with spreadsheets, PowerPoint slides and cost analysis reports to justify his marketing strategies at the executive boardroom meetings. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/73 "2007-02-02T01:04:30Z")
Great Baal. What with all the experts who seemingly don’t know more than google or wiki and the underachieving ne’er do-wells who chafe at going the extra mile at work… I’d come on as a consultant and recommend immediate closure and a real estate deal for the building and land. Number of employees: 0 Revenue from special items: $2,500,000 Consultant fees: $750,000 ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeBWonderful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3d9bf3/32.png) [@HandsomeBWonderful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeBWonderful)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/74 "2007-02-02T04:18:57Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] Heck, just pulling into the parking lot each morning would be an enriching experience because everyone will be using their blinkers, observing all the posted warnings and never taking more than one space in their gas effecient cars. Plus, if it’s raining they’d prolly want to share umbrellas. [/QUOTE] And only the people who really, really need the handicapped spots will use them. No wait, fat people are allowed too. No, also people with knee problems, and MadeUpAnkleDisease, and the guy who twisted his ankle during third-grade kickball. Yup, that should be fine. ---
**Author:** ![MrDantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@MrDantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDantastic)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/75 "2007-02-02T04:20:42Z")
It would be full of pictures and graphs about treadmills and airplanes. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/76 "2007-02-02T04:30:42Z")
We wouldn’t need to gossip at the water cooler, because we’d have already done so on line. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/77 "2007-02-02T14:14:23Z")
[QUOTE=HandsomeBWonderful] And only the people who really, really need the handicapped spots will use them. No wait, fat people are allowed too. No, also people with knee problems, and MadeUpAnkleDisease, and the guy who twisted his ankle during third-grade kickball. Yup, that should be fine. [/QUOTE] And no one is allowed to drive a Viper. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/78 "2007-02-02T22:58:35Z")
[QUOTE=Harmonious Discord] Tense [/QUOTE] We’re way past tense. We’re in bungalows. Thank you, Groucho. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2007, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/79 "2007-02-02T22:59:46Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] And no one is allowed to drive a Viper. [/QUOTE] Wait. CAn we all drive Hummers (Esp. Twickster) and then we’d all be ASSHOLES! I’ve always wanted to be an asshole. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2007, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364/80 "2007-02-03T02:45:45Z")
You can be an asshole if you want. Just make sure it’s an original Hummer, not one of those wimpy ones. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-an-office-staffed-solely-by-dopers-be-like/389364.md?page=5)