# What Would Be The Toughest Human Thing To Explain To Aliens? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 24, 2022, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782 "2022-06-24T18:40:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2022, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/61 "2022-06-27T19:34:52Z")
I think the hardest thing to explain, especially from an evolutionary viewpoint, is this habit the males of our species have of murdering women and their own children. The number one cause of maternal mortality is murder, usually by the woman’s partner. This habit is so enshrined in our culture that apparently now we need to make laws to ensure more women die of it. Go on, explain THAT to an alien. [https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-021-03392-8](https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-021-03392-8) ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2022, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/62 "2022-06-27T19:58:05Z")
I think food would be hard to explain. Alien: So how do you get your energy. Human: We have to eat, usually a few times a day. We grow crops in the fields. We used to hunt animals but now we raise them on farms for their meat, milk and eggs. We catch fish in our seas and oceans. Alien: Does everyone have enough food? Human: No. We grow much more food than we need, but some people don’t get very much. Alien: So you give them the extra. Human: No. We usually destroy it, throw it away or leave some unharvested. Alien: That’s weird. But you eat healthy when you can, right? Human: No, not usually. Most of our energy comes from eating foods that are not very good for us. Alien: Is that because you know little about food? Human: No. We prefer food that is not healthy. Alien: Weird. So you eat that less often? Human: No. In fact, many of us eat too much food. Alien: But that gives you more energy which you just burn off in other ways, right? ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2022, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/63 "2022-06-27T20:17:54Z")
Forgive me if someone suggested this already – don’t have time to scan right now CATS I think that I could explain Dogs – the utility is obvious. You could try to persuade them that the Egyptian domesticated cats to keep mice out of the grain, but they’d take one look at our cats and our relationship with them and say, “No, I don’t think so.” Don’t even try to explain pet Tarantulas and Iguanas. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2022, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/64 "2022-06-27T20:29:05Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > but they’d take one look at our cats and our relationship with them and say, “No, I don’t think so.” 5 minutes of Youtube videos and they’ll be worshipping the furry beasts just like the rest of us. Have the aliens laps? If so, 5 minutes there and the the ETs might as well be Feline Fedayeen. ---
**Author:** ![Bootb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@Bootb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bootb)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2022, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/65 "2022-06-27T23:23:55Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > I think the hardest thing to explain, especially from an evolutionary viewpoint, is this habit the males of our species have of murdering women and their own children. If you’re going strictly from what most people would consider an “evolutionary viewpoint,” not really. If you get right down to it, there is (A) nothing that compels a man to stick around to help raise his offspring, and (B) the man has nothing to do with the birth process. Furthermore, a man can impregnate multiple women for just slightly more effort than impregnating one woman. A murder here and there does essentially nothing to reduce a man’s chance of furthering his bloodline. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2022, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/66 "2022-06-27T23:45:01Z")
Evolution is a species thing, not an individual thing. Childbirth is an exceptionally difficult task for humans and yet murder kills more pregnant women than any complication. My male dogs will not ferociously attack a bitch even if she provokes them, because they are sane members of their cooperative species and evolution has taught dogs not to kill females and puppies. Something humans have apparently bypassed. There is no sanity in a species that doesn’t protect pregnant females and babies. Human males fail the basic evolutionary test. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/67 "2022-06-28T03:54:53Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > Something humans have apparently bypassed. There is no sanity in a species that doesn’t protect pregnant females and babies. Human males fail the basic evolutionary test. Humans are nowhere _near_ the only species that kill their own young or where the males kill the previous offspring of a female they want to mate with. It’s probably one of the _easiest_ things for an alien to understand because it happens all over the animal kingdom. [https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/140328-sloth-bear-zoo-infanticide-chimps-bonobos-animals](https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/140328-sloth-bear-zoo-infanticide-chimps-bonobos-animals) ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/68 "2022-06-28T04:47:14Z")
**What Would Be The Toughest Human Thing To Explain To Aliens?** Pointing out and making a distinction between species we ignore, those we slaughter, and those we covet as pets. And also explaining why some individuals of a species that we usually ignore or slaughter are sometimes kept as pets? Did they win the “_Best of Species_” Award and given clemency? Alien: _Why is this poor fellow with the squiggly tail being bludgeoned to death and sawed into pieces, while this happy fellow with the fancy haircut and diamond encrusted collar eats caviar off a sliver platter and is given toys by you humans?_ Human: _Well, this one tastes good…and, that one don’t._ ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/69 "2022-06-28T12:09:08Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > The number one cause of maternal mortality is murder, usually by the woman’s partner. **[One of the publications cited by your article](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34619735/)** claims 3.62 homicides per 100,000 live births. This means that out of 100,000 expectant fathers, 99,996 of them (99.996%) managed to refrain from killing their pregnant partner. Although one should hope that murder would be ranked at the very bottom of the mortality causes list for any demographic group, it is a grossly misandristic overstatement to assert that human males have a habit of murdering women and their own children, or that they have failed “the basic evolutionary test.” ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/70 "2022-06-28T17:42:06Z")
Factor in everyday non-pregnant intimate partner violence, rape and sexual assault, molested and abused children and, well, the fucking government making laws that turn women into barely second class citizens and yes, human males are a failed experiment. Go ahead, prove me wrong by being better but, well, you won’t. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/71 "2022-06-28T18:58:10Z")
The sheer number of people who suffer from physical/sexual violence is distressing, but the entire male gender is not the evil faction you make them out to be. On **[intimate partner violence](https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/intimatepartnerviolence/fastfact.html)**: > - About 1 in 4 women and nearly 1 in 10 men have experienced contact sexual violence, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner during their lifetime and reported some form of IPV-related impact. Most people go through multiple intimate partners in their lifetime, so “1 in 4 women” experiencing IPV does not mean 1 in 4 men are violence-prone assholes. Suppose the typical woman has five intimate partners in her life; if one man out of 20 were a perpetrator of IPV, that would be enough to account for this statistic - meaning 19 men out of 20 are not violence-prone monsters. > - Over 43 million women and 38 million men have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner in their lifetime. Assuming most of the people in these stats are in heterosexual relationships, men do have the lead when it comes to being the asshole in a relationship, but it would appear it’s a fairly close contest, with women certainly doing their part. Child abuse? There’s this **[PDF](https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubpdfs/canstats.pdf)**: > **WHO ABUSED AND NEGLECTED CHILDREN?** > > In FFY 2019, 52 States reported a total of 525,319 perpetrators of child maltreatment (each perpetrator counted once, regardless of the number of children or reports involved). > > More than one-half (53.0 percent) of perpetrators were women, 46.1 percent of > perpetrators were men, and 0.9 percent were of unknown sex. Waddya know, women are smacking the kids around more than men. And the actual number of men here is 242,172. That’s about 0.2% of all adult men in the US, meaning 99.8% of men are not child abusers. Abortion? > **['Pro-Choice' or 'Pro-Life' Demographic Table](https://news.gallup.com/poll/244709/pro-choice-pro-life-2018-demographic-tables.aspx)** > > Americans' identification as "pro-choice" or "pro-life" on abortion is provided here in tabular form, with breakouts by key population subgroups. It’s true that men are underrepresented on the pro-choice side (48% men, 61% women) and overrepresented on the pro-life side (47% men, 33% women). But fully half of men support the bodily autonomy of women, and a depressing 1/3 of women support laws that turn women into second-class citizens. Bottom line, the male half of the species is not a lost cause, and to the extent that some men have a dark side, they are not the only gender that does. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/72 "2022-06-28T21:13:07Z")
You seem really defensive, is there something you want to tell us? ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2022, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/73 "2022-06-28T21:25:36Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > Evolution is a species thing, not an individual thing. Childbirth is an exceptionally difficult task for humans and yet murder kills more pregnant women than any complication. Emphasis on today. Before just over 100 years ago a significant number of mothers died during pregnancy (especially since they were pregnant so often) and a large percentage of children died early. Not sure what that has to do with anything, but evolutionarily speaking our improvement of the odds of surviving childbirth is not going to mean anything. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/74 "2022-06-29T00:08:39Z")
Alien: Where is everybody going? Me: To work Alien: Why? Me: In exchange for money. You remember our conversation about what money is? Alien: Yes, it made no sense, but please continue Me: They go to work where they do something that mostly they hate doing, but they endure it in exchange for money Alien: Why is it necessary for them to do the things they hate? Me: Well, some of it is to create or maintain things that are necessary for the survival of our species Alien: And the rest of the work? Me: Some of it is to create or maintain things that, whilst they are not strictly necessary, improve the perceived quality of life for the recipients Alien: Some. And the rest of the work? Me: Well, a lot of it is to maintain the existence of the organisations that provide the work Alien: Humans made these organisations? Me: Yes Alien: Yet they serve them? Me: Well, yes, in exchange for money Alien: We already discussed that the money is necessary to exchange for vital sustenance, even though that exchange is nonsensical to us, but what else is the money used for? Me: To exchange for habitation Alien: But the humans spend all of their time away from the habitation, either at work, or for the purposes you call ‘leisure’ and ‘vacation’ Me: Well, yes, but the humans need somewhere to sleep Alien: The humans go to work, which they hate, to serve organisations that exist only to exist, in exchange for money that they subsequently exchange for a place that they only inhabit whilst unconscious…? ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/75 "2022-06-29T13:37:24Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > You seem really defensive, is there something you want to tell us? No more than what I’ve already said: your description of the entire male gender as habitual murderers, rapists, child molesters and oppressors is hateful, offensive, and not borne out by data. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/76 "2022-06-29T17:52:13Z")
Declaring huge swathes of the human race to be second class citizens who do not deserve human rights is pretty fucking offensive too, and the fact that most men range from apathetic on the subject to outright complicit means you get tarred with the same brush. Don’t like it? Clean your own Augean stables before you nitpick the spill on my stove. ---
**Author:** ![MikeF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@MikeF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeF)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/77 "2022-06-29T17:57:59Z")
I can’t believe no has mentioned this (or I missed it) -humor. What make someone laugh at something? Why is coyote getting hit in the head with an anvil something to laugh at? What is laughter, anyway? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/78 "2022-06-29T18:01:00Z")
“Tragedy is when I stub my toe. Comedy is when you fall into an open manhole and die.” - Mel Brooks Yeah, that would be a hard reach. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/79 "2022-06-29T18:25:43Z")
Closed on June 29, 2022, 6:25pm UTC ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2022, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782/80 "2022-06-29T18:29:23Z")
This thread has gone badly off-topic and I’m not sure I can split it. The strong argument can be restarted in the Pit if desired. I’m going to see if I can determine a way to break this up or not. I suspect I will leave it closed. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-the-toughest-human-thing-to-explain-to-aliens/966782.md?page=3)