# What would be your last request to Medusa? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 17, 2016, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021 "2016-05-17T18:56:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Totenfeier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@Totenfeier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Totenfeier)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/21 "2016-05-18T10:59:53Z")
Can I get to _feel_ stoned the whole time? ---
**Author:** ![Me\_Billy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e480ec/32.png) [@Me\_Billy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Me_Billy)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/22 "2016-05-18T14:08:11Z")
Make my “schlong” twice as long! Then my statue will outdo the statue of “David”. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/23 "2016-05-18T14:36:10Z")
“If you are looking for more subjects may I suggest …” ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/24 "2016-05-18T14:43:43Z")
> [@kopek](#): > > “If you are looking for more subjects may I suggest …” Dr. Carson, is that you? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/25 "2016-05-18T14:47:00Z")
Please Don’t turn me into a Quartz statue. I can’t stand Quartz! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/26 "2016-05-18T15:51:47Z")
Let me get in my car for one last drive, why don’t you come along, Medusa, sit in the passenger seat… Option 1; my passenger side air bag has been disabled, get up to top speed, find a handy bridge abutment and slam the passenger side of the car into the abutment, crushing Medusa, while I have a little better survival chance as my airbags work Option 2; instead of a bridge abutment, get the car T-boned on the passenger side Option 3; flip down the passenger side sun visor, which coincidentally has a vanity mirror in it… Now, I didn’t _technically_ use a mirror directly on her, one just happened to be there Option 4; get a Weeping Angel to touch her… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![stillownedbysetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/27 "2016-05-18T16:47:39Z")
“Medusa, hon, can we talk? Girl to girl? Can you steer away from those white marbles? I don’t want to spend eternity with my ass looking gigantic. You get that, right?” ---
**Author:** ![Chihuahua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dec6dc/32.png) [@Chihuahua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chihuahua)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/28 "2016-05-18T16:49:02Z")
On the base of my plinth, please chisel the words, “Inventor of Pornography.” Even though I die, my fame will last forever. ---
**Author:** ![skdo23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@skdo23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/skdo23)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/29 "2016-05-18T17:06:01Z")
> [@MacTech](#): > > Option 3; flip down the passenger side sun visor, which coincidentally has a vanity mirror in it… Now, I didn’t _technically_ use a mirror directly on her, one just happened to be there Would using a mirror on her actually work? I was under the impression that Perseus was able to behead her by looking at her reflection on his shield while attacking her so he could keep track of her movements without being turned to stone, as he would have been from staring at her directly. Or is that what you meant? ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/30 "2016-05-18T17:36:29Z")
A box of angry mongooses, please. [sub]mongeese?[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/31 "2016-05-18T19:45:07Z")
> [@Me\_Billy](#): > > Make my “schlong” twice as long! Then my statue will outdo the statue of “David”. Sure; she’ll have to remove your testicles to compensate, though. Before your petrification. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2016, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/32 "2016-05-18T20:06:09Z")
> [@AHunter3](#): > > A box of angry mongooses, please. > > [sub]mongeese?[/sub] Mongopods. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2016, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/33 "2016-05-19T22:42:46Z")
“Wait — Can I write your biography first?” ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/34 "2016-05-20T01:20:40Z")
Blindness ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/35 "2016-05-20T01:36:36Z")
No request. I just reiterate that, like that bitch Arachne, she totally had it coming. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/36 "2016-05-20T02:04:11Z")
Can I have a mirror? ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/37 "2016-05-20T07:48:30Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > “Wait — Can I write your biography first?” For that impertinence she has you pose with a clay tablet and stylus. And still petrifies you. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 10:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/38 "2016-05-20T10:07:02Z")
> [@Trinopus](#): > > After you’ve petrified me, can you get a sculptor to come in with hammer and chisel, and modify my statue so that it’s worth anybody looking at? That’s what she does anyway. But for your impertinence you get bitten. > [@AskNott](#): > > If I’m gonna be a statue, can you give me a few weeks to work on my abs and pecs? Nope. Any extra definition will be done by her. > [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > I’d like a month or two to kill all the pigeons on the island first? Medusa is amused and has you pose with a parasol and a bowl. You still get petrified. > [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > On the off chance that I’ll still have some kind of feeling after the transformation, I’d request I be allowed to pose as a sitting statue. Granted! Unfortunately you’ll be dead and won’t feel anything at all. > [@Totenfeier](#): > > Can I get to _feel_ stoned the whole time? Nope, you’re dead. Sorry about that. But future owners may get tactile pleasure from feeling your statue. > [@BubbaDog](#): > > Please Don’t turn me into a Quartz statue. I can’t stand Quartz! 😃 Bad BubbaDog! 🙂 > [@Chihuahua](#): > > Even though I die, my fame will last forever. This comes close to my own thought: have my name inscribed on the plinth. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 10:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/39 "2016-05-20T10:09:57Z")
> [@Chihuahua](#): > > On the base of my plinth, please chisel the words, “Inventor of Pornography.” Nope. She’s not going to risk the wrath of Priapus. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2016, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021/40 "2016-05-20T13:07:47Z")
Perseus comes onto the island of Medusa. He has a magic spell to un-petrify statues, but it only works for an hour. He picks out two statues, one male and one female, and un-petrifies them. “OK, go off and do whatever you want for an hour”, he tells them, and they run off into the bushes. Perseus hears much giggling. He peeks into the bushes. The male statue has a pigeon. He says to the female statue “OK, now \*I \*will hold him down while \*you \*shit on him.” Regards, Shodan [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-be-your-last-request-to-medusa/755021.md?page=3)