# What Would Jesus Do? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2005, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214 "2005-04-14T00:23:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/1 "2005-04-14T00:23:00Z")
Well, for starters, he wouldn’t be a big honkin’ Suburban such as the one you’ve got the bumper-sticker stuck to. That’s my guess, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/2 "2005-04-14T00:24:15Z")
“Buy,” not “be,” dammit! ---
**Author:** ![Nic2004](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4491bb/32.png) [@Nic2004](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nic2004)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/3 "2005-04-14T00:32:16Z")
**W** hat **W** ould **D** arwin **T** hink? I like this one better. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/4 "2005-04-14T00:32:19Z")
He wouldn’t BE a Suburban, either–I don’t think He can transmogrify…leave that to the wizards(Satan’s spawns!). Me, I see Jesus in a Mini-Cooper. Or a VW Thing (remember those?). ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/5 "2005-04-14T00:54:04Z")
In a recent thread, I asked what would Xena do? I realized that the solution would be illegal, so nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/6 "2005-04-14T00:58:26Z")
> [@Scott\_plaid](#): > > In a recent thread, I asked what would Xena do? I realized that the solution would be illegal, so nevermind. Figures \*my \* mind jumped straight into the gutter until I realized you’d meant she’d kill people or something. ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/7 "2005-04-14T01:32:32Z")
When I first came here from Canada, I started seeing all these cars with WWJD stickers on them. I had to ask my wife what wildly popular radio station it was. She had a good laugh. Oh well, culture shock and all that… ---
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/8 "2005-04-14T01:35:10Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > He wouldn’t BE a Suburban, either–I don’t think He can transmogrify…leave that to the wizards(Satan’s spawns!). > > Me, I see Jesus in a Mini-Cooper. Or a VW Thing (remember those?). I still see VW Things! Interesting looking things. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/9 "2005-04-14T01:35:26Z")
Heh! 😃 Yeah, to be specific, it was a pitting, and my message was as follows, in case you are curious: > [@Scott\_plaid](#): > > This is extremely frustrating. How am I suppose to argue against such circular minds. Hmmmmmm… > > WWJD? (Who wants jelly donuts?) The guy at the store gave me a bnch, even though I asked for Boston Creams, and it takes to long to get back. > > No wait, that wasn’t it. WWJJD? (What would Joan Jett do?) Hold on, that’s not applicable. > > WWXD (What would Xena do?) Well, it’s a good idea, but it isn’t legal. > > **I GOT IT!** WWSD! > > Here is a question for all of you out there who supports the church and its policy of celibacy of unmarried people. Do you believe that jesus was a good person? The WWSD was meant to be "What Would Socrates Do, and I was hoping to point out, once I received a reply, that since Jesus was supposed to be a good person, and he broke religious laws to help people, christians should approve of catholic priests who do similar things, re: aids education and condom use in Africa, as opposed to others on the thread, who believed that the church should not change it’s stance one iota. ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/10 "2005-04-14T01:42:32Z")
Jesus would drive an Accord. After all, all the angels were in one. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/11 "2005-04-14T03:30:24Z")
J.W.T.T.B. [sub]Jesus Would Take The Bus[/sub] He would not be one for material possessions. ---
**Author:** ![Coin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@Coin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coin)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/12 "2005-04-14T03:33:12Z")
WWJD? Doesn’t that seem like a highly inappropriate thing to be advertising on your bumper sticker? Keep the Neo-Nazi crap to yourself, man. “We Want Jews Dead” indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Campion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@Campion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Campion)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/13 "2005-04-14T04:33:27Z")
No, no, no. It’s "Who Wants Jack Daniels?’ To which the only appropriate answer is, of course, “Me!” ---
**Author:** ![Abbie\_Carmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@Abbie\_Carmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abbie_Carmichael)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/14 "2005-04-14T05:01:53Z")
He would totally be up for Chinese food. 'Cause it’s kosher and all … ---
**Author:** ![Black\_Train\_Song](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4da419/32.png) [@Black\_Train\_Song](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Black_Train_Song)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/15 "2005-04-14T05:02:31Z")
Would Jesus ask what somebody else would do? I think not. ---
**Author:** ![Abbie\_Carmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@Abbie\_Carmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abbie_Carmichael)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/16 "2005-04-14T05:32:46Z")
> [@Rooves](#): > > Would Jesus ask what somebody else would do? > > I think not. Of course He wouldn’t, since He’d already know the answer to the question. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Black\_Train\_Song](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4da419/32.png) [@Black\_Train\_Song](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Black_Train_Song)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/17 "2005-04-14T05:45:04Z")
> [@Abbie Carmichael](#): > > Of course He wouldn’t, since He’d already know the answer to the question. 🙂 Are you accusing Jesus of the equivelent of insider trading? ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/18 "2005-04-14T05:59:33Z")
I think Jesus would be into classic cars, especially Plymouths. Don’t I remember reading that He drove some money-changers out of a temple in a Fury? Of course, if He wanted an SUV, He would look for a late-model Jeep or Dodge – something with the Christler badge on it. ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/19 "2005-04-14T06:13:22Z")
When I played in an oldies rock band a few years ago, the lead singer had a satin jacket. On the front was WWED? On the back? What Would Elvis Do? ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2005, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214/20 "2005-04-14T06:21:54Z")
Jesus would write on the ground, ignoring everyone and if pestered sufficiently would say, ‘Let him who is flawless judge others.’ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-jesus-do/299214.md?page=2)