# What Would the 2-Fisted Fightin' Jesus Drive? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 24, 2008, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334 "2008-10-24T12:16:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/1 "2008-10-24T12:16:29Z")
[The church tank!](http://www.core77.com/blog/object_culture/tank_god_youre_here_11428.asp) Not sure if its a good thing or not that its only a CGI rendering. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/2 "2008-10-24T12:38:48Z")
Not sure exactly what to make of that, artistically speaking. I mean I get the historical connection between the church and war and all but…doesn’t a tank sort of understate the relationship a bit? ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/3 "2008-10-24T15:05:02Z")
He would drive Republicans into a herd of swine and then into the sea. ---
**Author:** ![History\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b19c9b/32.png) [@History\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/History_Geek)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/4 "2008-10-24T16:11:43Z")
Not quite what leapt to mind from the thread title. I pictured Jesus in a fedora, hanging out the window of a big round-bodied old Ford, blazing twin .45s in his mitts. Maybe a 50s model Ford, as Jesus fights agents of Communism for J. Edgar Hoover! ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/5 "2008-10-24T16:28:08Z")
Jesus wouldn’t even give J. Edgar a reacharound. Can we put more of a [minaret](http://www.hat.net/album/middle_east/002_syria/001_highlights_of_syria/034_minaret_of_grand_mosque.jpg) thingy on top of Church Tank? It could serve as effective camouflage in Muslim areas, especially with a muezzin sample blaring out the top. Then when the faithful assemble, you lay the Good News on 'em. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/6 "2008-10-24T16:32:35Z")
The Popemobile ---
**Author:** ![bathsheba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9e8a1a/32.png) [@bathsheba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bathsheba)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/7 "2008-10-24T21:49:20Z")
Jesus drove a Honda, but he didn’t like to talk about it. “I did not speak of my own accord.” (John 12:49, NIV) ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/8 "2008-10-24T22:00:01Z")
Jesus owned a Plymouth. He drove the moneychangers from the Temple in a Fury. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/9 "2008-10-24T22:48:12Z")
It looks like something from Warhammer 40k. ---
**Author:** ![bathsheba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9e8a1a/32.png) [@bathsheba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bathsheba)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/10 "2008-10-24T23:02:15Z")
The Apostles carpooled. “And they were all with one Accord”. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/11 "2008-10-24T23:08:15Z")
You may laugh now, but when the Vampire Army invades, our brave boys in their Church tanks are going to be all that stands between us and total defeat. ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-the-2-fisted-fightin-jesus-drive/469334/12 "2008-10-24T23:27:30Z")
> [@pravnik](#): > > Jesus owned a Plymouth. He drove the moneychangers from the Temple in a Fury. BA-DA-BING, BA-DA-BOOM ! Love it. 😛