# What would US-Japanese relations be like if Godzilla were real? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 1, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999 "2009-08-01T20:41:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/1 "2009-08-01T20:41:08Z")
In GD, there is a [discussion](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=11388619#post11388619) going on about a hypothetical US-UK schism and its effect on the world. Someone brought up the issue of whose side Japan would take, inspiring this post: > [@Suppose the UK and USA fell out.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/suppose-the-uk-and-usa-fell-out/504564/25): > > \ > The Japanese are big anglephiles, but they remember what happened they last time they crossed us: the radioactive fallout awakened Godzilla who is still trashing Tokyo. I have no bone in the aforementioned debate. But it made me wonder: what are US-Japanese relations like in a world in which Godzilla and his ilk were awakened by US nuclear bombs? Thoughts, anyone? Bueller? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/2 "2009-08-01T20:43:20Z")
Don’t know about US-Japanese relations, but I do know Bull Halsey would be laughing his ass off! ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/3 "2009-08-01T20:45:10Z")
Presumably, their post-war economic boom would never have happened, so they’d essentially be the Poland or maybe the Yugoslavia of East Asia and probably a satellite state of China, at least for a time. So long as Gojira remained confined to the islands, I’d expect the populace would have been evacuated long ago, and the whole place would by now be a high-flyover tourist destination, like Haight-Ashbury or a Kansas City Royals ballgame. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/4 "2009-08-01T20:49:44Z")
What about triangular diplomacy with Godzilla, Mothra and Rodan? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/5 "2009-08-01T20:51:39Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > Presumably, their post-war economic boom would never have happened, so they’d essentially be the Poland or maybe the Yugoslavia of East Asia and probably a satellite state of China, at least for a time. So long as Gojira remained confined to the islands, I’d expect the populace would have been evacuated long ago, and the whole place would by now be a high-flyover tourist destination, like Haight-Ashbury or a Kansas City Royals ballgame. Mayhap. Oh the other hand they might have experienced a technological boom based in part on the extreme motivation a giant kaiju would be to the military industrial complex, and in part on Godzilla’s culling of the stupider portions of the populace. > [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > What about triangular diplomacy with Godzilla, Mothra and Rodan? What about it? Also, wouldn’t that be rectangular diplomacy? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/6 "2009-08-01T20:53:49Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Don’t know about US-Japanese relations, but I do know Bull Halsey would be laughing his ass off! “The only place Lizard will be spoken is i Hell!” ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/7 "2009-08-01T21:23:56Z")
It would certainly put complaints about Acid Rain in a new perspective. ---
**Author:** ![Kozmik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8dc957/32.png) [@Kozmik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kozmik)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2009, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/8 "2009-08-01T21:36:53Z")
[The French would be allied with American scientists.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godzilla_(1998_film)) ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/9 "2009-08-02T00:26:33Z")
I don’t really see it making much difference. Whatever big critters come boiling up from the depths will be promptly killed, likely before they get more than halfway through a decent, movie-sized rampage. We are Americans. We are very good at making things dead. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Some\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ad7895/32.png) [@Just\_Some\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Some_Guy)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/10 "2009-08-02T12:33:59Z")
In this situation I would foresee a Japanese dominated world within thirty years of Godzilla emerging. The constant monster attacks would drive them to create anti-kaiju technologies including the inevitable giant mech. Once the Japanese have those it’s all over for the rest of the world. ---
**Author:** ![Skylark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Skylark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skylark)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/11 "2009-08-02T12:59:17Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > I don’t really see it making much difference. Whatever big critters come boiling up from the depths will be promptly killed, likely before they get more than halfway through a decent, movie-sized rampage. We are Americans. We are very good at making things dead. But only after the ninety minute mark. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/12 "2009-08-02T15:12:10Z")
True, but those 90 minutes are total destruction of whatever Japanese city the producers are based in. So it’s a win-win for the US. We nuke Japan, they get monsters, we nuke monsters, repeat as necessary. Kinda hard on the civilians, but they should have thought of that before they folded to Perry. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/13 "2009-08-02T17:54:20Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > What about triangular diplomacy with Godzilla, Mothra and Rodan? We were always at war with Mothra. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/14 "2009-08-02T19:32:53Z")
Gojira _is_ real. After his initial appearance, the Illuminati worked very hard to capture him and convince people that it was all just a movie. ---
**Author:** ![Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uosdwis_R.Dewoh)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/15 "2009-08-02T21:37:30Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > [The French would be allied with American scientists.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godzilla_(1998_film)) The movie has a bad rep and deservedly so, but I found the French special agents hilarious. I especially loved that their attempt to blend in with Americans was to chew gum constantly. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/16 "2009-08-02T22:07:25Z")
Which Godzilla? The 50 meter tall, 20,000 ton version, or the 100 meter tall, 60,000 ton version? Either way, what do you do with it after its dead? That’s a mighty big, mighty radioactive, piece of rotting lizard meat. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/17 "2009-08-02T22:09:26Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Gojira _is_ real. After his initial appearance, the Illuminati worked very hard to capture him and convince people that it was all just a movie. He _was_, but with a lot of effort on our parts, we shunted him over to the same Universe in which Superman is real. Let him deal with it. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/18 "2009-08-02T22:15:20Z")
> [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](#): > > Which Godzilla? > > The 50 meter tall, 20,000 ton version, or the 100 meter tall, 60,000 ton version? > > Either way, what do you do with it after its dead? > > That’s a mighty big, mighty radioactive, piece of rotting lizard meat. What do you thinks up with all those super cheap ramen noodles? They just put a tiny bit in each package. Like fighting ignorance, its just taking awhile. Trust me, I’ve seen the giant freezer. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/19 "2009-08-02T23:24:26Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > I don’t really see it making much difference. Whatever big critters come boiling up from the depths will be promptly killed, likely before they get more than halfway through a decent, movie-sized rampage. We are Americans. We are very good at making things dead. Perhaps I was unclear in my OP. I was assuming that the King of Monsters and his lesser ilk were concentrating their attacks on Japan, not the US (as implied in the post I quoted) and thinking that there might be a wee bit of resentment on the part of the Japanese against us for our part in awakening the kaiju. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2009, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999/20 "2009-08-02T23:29:27Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > there might be a wee bit of resentment on the part of the Japanese against us for our part in awakening the kaiju. I would think they would be concentrating on not ending up as a lot of the folks in _Jurassic Park_ to have much time to worry about it. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-us-japanese-relations-be-like-if-godzilla-were-real/504999.md?page=2)