# What would you do if you had superpowers? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 19, 2006, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251 "2006-06-19T04:09:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/21 "2006-06-19T16:11:24Z")
The OP is too vague for me. Are these X-Men style superpowers, the kind with which one can do a particular thing very impressively (like control the weather) but otherwise the individual with said power is subject to human limitations? Or are we talking Superman powers, where you’re on par with a Classical God and can do virtually any damn thing you like? ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/22 "2006-06-19T16:19:38Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > I don’t think that would scare them. I mean, even though you may make them become athiest, God wouldn’t send them to hell because it was against their will (honestly, I don’t think anything could scare a fanatic). I disagree; if I could put Osama Bin Laden or the Pope on TV and have them give interviews where they detail just how stupid they think they’re former religion is, I think that would really creep their former fellow believers out. On a related note, how would the Catholic laity feel if they knew for a fact thhat the entire priesthood was now composed of atheists ? I think I’m developing mad-scientist tendancies, here . . . ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/23 "2006-06-19T19:41:10Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > The OP is too vague for me. Are these X-Men style superpowers, the kind with which one can do a particular thing very impressively (like control the weather) but otherwise the individual with said power is subject to human limitations? Or are we talking Superman powers, where you’re on par with a Classical God and can do virtually any damn thing you like? What I’m thinking is X-Men style superpowers. You’re subject to human limitations except in your power. ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2006, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/24 "2006-06-19T20:02:08Z")
OK. I’d control the weather to insure perfect skiing conditions! ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2006, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/25 "2006-06-22T17:07:41Z")
> [@Der Trihs](#): > > One power I’d need would be the ability to _make_ people into atheists; to burn out whatever it is in people’s brains that produces religiousity. Religious fanatics might not fear death, but _that_ would scare them. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Malienation](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Malienation](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malienation)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2006, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/26 "2006-06-22T19:57:34Z")
Something to keep in mind: what seems like a fun power today turns into a soul-draining responsibility tomorrow. Anyone seen “Spiderman II?” I’d use my powers to make lotsa money in a low key way (telekinetically manipulate casino dice? hmmm…), keep my head down, and live an anonymous life under the radar. No one would know me, about me, or about my skills, i.e., I would not be some sort of masked vigilante. Pursuing fame (or infamy) is not for me, even, as with most superheroes, if the fame is anonymous (sounds contradictory, but you know what I mean). I might also consider using my skills to make money in a way that also benefits society, like being a bounty hunter. Tracking down bail jumpers seems profitable and low-key, unlikely to get one’s name or picture in the paper, no? And I would treat the felons well, too…I wouldn’t abuse my powers. And how’s this for odd: although I am not religious, I would always operate under the assumption that my powers were granted to me by some higher power that is testing me to see how I use them. ---
**Author:** ![LiveOnAPlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3d9bf3/32.png) [@LiveOnAPlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiveOnAPlane)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2006, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/27 "2006-06-22T21:01:55Z")
I think that while I would use them to make lots of money, I’d also try to help out: Weather Control: Bring rain to drought-stricken areas. No, wait. Any motorist who crashed in the rain would sue me for causing it. OK, I’d super-speed accident victims to hospitals. No, wait. Then I’d get sued for…for…my actions caused further injury or something. I could save plunging airliners. No, wait. The airline would sue me for any damage to the airplane. The passengers would sue me for for bumps/bruises caused by my suddenly pulling the plane out of the dive to earth. Maybe I could find people’s lost keys or cell phones or jewelry. No, wait. The cops would interrogate me as a suspect and probably bring theft charges against me. Aw, screw it. I’d just subjugate the world and be Supreme Dictator! ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2006, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/28 "2006-06-22T23:01:52Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > :rolleyes: In a thread where people talk about becoming world dictator, with slaves and concubines, my comment rates a :rolleyes: ? ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2006, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/29 "2006-06-23T08:37:37Z")
> [@Der Trihs](#): > > In a thread where people talk about becoming world dictator, with slaves and concubines, my comment rates a :rolleyes: ? If the people in question continually went on and on about world dictatorship, then no, it wouldn’t. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2006, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/30 "2006-06-23T08:53:40Z")
> [@Der Trihs](#): > > Probably start my own war against much of America; the warmongers, Christofascists and corporate elite. Vaporizing the tobacco industry comes to mind. Oh, and I’d blow up the Vatican and Mecca. > > One power I’d need would be the ability to _make_ people into atheists; to burn out whatever it is in people’s brains that produces religiousity. Religious fanatics might not fear death, but _that_ would scare them. OK, I’d use my superpowers to stop **Der Trihs**! Cool, I’ve got an archenemy! Dude, you can spit on the Pope all you want, but leave the buildings alone. ---
**Author:** ![gabriela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/db5fbb/32.png) [@gabriela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gabriela)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2006, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/31 "2006-06-23T10:24:52Z")
> [@Malienation](#): > > Something to keep in mind: what seems like a fun power today turns into a soul-draining responsibility tomorrow. Anyone seen “Spiderman II?” Oooh! Oooh! Can I be Spidey? Screw making money and manipulating other’s brains - I’d just move to New York City and webswing, webswing, webswing! I would have a BLAST! And I wouldn’t stop until I got bored (like ten years) or had a fabulous bod. That damn great responsibility coming with the great powers would be a hitch, though. ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2006, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/32 "2006-06-23T13:49:52Z")
When people toss cigarette butts out the windows of their cars, I’d like the power to lift those butts back up and toss them back through the car windows, onto the offender’s lap. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2006, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/33 "2006-06-23T14:05:25Z")
I’d bitch slap all the world leaders and tell them if they can’t work out their differences then they, themselves, are welcome to fight each other. What they CAN’T do is enlist the denizens of their country to fight for them. I know this sounds terribly cliche but I really wonder what would happen. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2006, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/34 "2006-06-24T10:17:03Z")
> [@Der Trihs](#): > > On a related note, how would the Catholic laity feel if they knew for a fact that the entire priesthood was now composed of atheists ? You only need to look at the Church of England for your answer. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Clam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3bc359/32.png) [@Happy\_Clam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Clam)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2006, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/35 "2006-06-24T10:38:14Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > OK, I’d use my superpowers to stop **Der Trihs**! Cool, I’ve got an archenemy! > > Dude, you can spit on the Pope all you want, but leave the buildings alone. Y’know, that sounds kinda fun. If he’s Superman, one of us can be Braniac, one of us Lex Luthor, ok? Now, are you a superintelligent alien robot with access to technology far beyond the ken of humanity? If not, we may have some problems… ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2006, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/36 "2006-06-24T10:50:13Z")
I would need invisibilty, invulnerability, the ability to fly at high speed, and Wonder Woman’s lasso, which can compel anyone in its coils to speak the truth. Then I’d kidnap various world leaders and interview them live on TV. I’d start with Bush and Rove in a twofer interview. It might go something like this: EC: Mr. Bush, did you really believe that Saddam Hussein had WMDs when you led America into war? Bush: No, Evil, I was lying my ass off on that one. EC: Mr. Rove, did you use any illegal methods to steal the 2000 election and the 2004 election? Rove: We used all the illegal methods, Evil. We stole both elections with them. Or I’d interview Osama bin Laden: EC: What’s your real opinion of suicide bombers, Mr. bin Laden? Bin Laden: They’re idiots, of course. Useful idiots, but idiots. And so on and so forth. I imagine the ratings would be very high. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2006, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/37 "2006-06-24T17:07:58Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > OK, I’d use my superpowers to stop **Der Trihs**! Cool, I’ve got an archenemy! > > Dude, you can spit on the Pope all you want, but leave the buildings alone. But if I don’t destroy his extradimensional power source, he’ll just come back in one of his clone bodies ! C’mon, be realistic ! ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2006, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/38 "2006-06-26T12:05:03Z")
> [@SHAKES](#): > > I’d bitch slap all the world leaders and tell them if they can’t work out their differences then they, themselves, are welcome to fight each other. What they CAN’T do is enlist the denizens of their country to fight for them. > > I know this sounds terribly cliche but I really wonder what would happen. We’d elect Chuck Norris president. about damn time! ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2006, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/39 "2006-06-26T13:11:43Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > We’d elect Chuck Norris president. > > about damn time! So long as it’s Chuck and not Steven Seagal… **Der Trihs** , I believe you mistook the Popemobile for a Shi’Ar wheelchair. Different fellow, the Pope has much better hair. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2006, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251/40 "2006-06-26T19:49:24Z")
I’d do a lot more than _Bruce Almighty_, that’s for sure. That movie had so much potential… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-if-you-had-superpowers/361251.md?page=3)