# What would you do? (Teenage sex question) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 18, 2011, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028 "2011-01-18T01:21:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![Walmarticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Walmarticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walmarticus)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/201 "2011-01-18T18:47:36Z")
**ZPG Zealot** , you probably did your nephew a big favor by disposing of his phone. The wrong person could have seen and he could have been in shitdicks of trouble. You are, however, not doing him or her any favors by getting the law involved. Opening a can of worms like this can only ruin lives. Seriously, what good thing are you expecting to get out of it? I guess you’re trying to fuck her over before she fucks him over. How about nobody fucks anybody over? After all, 16 year olds more often fuck, than they fuck over. And I wouldn’t know a Roma if they were camping in my yard (lol, sorry). I really doubt Roma prejudice is barely relevant. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/202 "2011-01-18T18:57:20Z")
> [@Walmarticus](#): > > And I wouldn’t know a Roma if they were camping in my yard (lol, sorry). Same here. I’d probably think they were Gypsies, or something. :p;)😃 ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/203 "2011-01-18T19:04:40Z")
> [@Walmarticus](#): > > **ZPG Zealot** , you probably did your nephew a big favor by disposing of his phone. The wrong person could have seen and he could have been in shitdicks of trouble. > > You are, however, not doing him or her any favors by getting the law involved. Opening a can of worms like this can only ruin lives. Seriously, what good thing are you expecting to get out of it? I guess you’re trying to fuck her over before she fucks him over. How about nobody fucks anybody over? After all, 16 year olds more often fuck, than they fuck over. > > And I wouldn’t know a Roma if they were camping in my yard (lol, sorry). I really doubt Roma prejudice is barely relevant. My argument is that it wasn’t his phone, but a phone I owned which he was allowed to use because pay phones are hard to find and teenagers like technology. He was allowed to carry and use the phone with the stipulation that if he misused it, it would be taken away and destroyed. He misused the phone . I smashed the phone to pieces with a hammer in front of him. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/204 "2011-01-18T19:06:18Z")
[quote=“Walmarticus, post:201, topic:568028”] I guess you’re trying to fuck her over before she fucks him over. [QUOTE] Ab-so-fucking-lutely! ---
**Author:** ![Walmarticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Walmarticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walmarticus)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/205 "2011-01-18T19:09:41Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Ab-so-fucking-lutely! Do you have any reason to suspect this girl was intending to accuse him of raping her? I’d really hate to think you’d ruin an innocent girl’s life due to paranoia. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/206 "2011-01-18T19:13:15Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > The hypocrisy it burns! The kid’s father doesn’t give a damn and considers how many women he can nail a competitive sport. His father would say, “Screw the condoms, they just cut down on the feeling.” I’m sending Nephew X to talk with a family friend he likes about how there are different cultures in the world and how this girl comes from one where things like false accusations of rape and being sued for child support for a child conceived outside of marriage do occur and that being 16 will not save him from adult problems. The kid lives in texas. I can assume he is not locked away since he was able to get a girlfriend. So as a texan its his culture too and he probably understands it better than you. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/207 "2011-01-18T19:18:09Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Ab-so-fucking-lutely! What would you do if, as a result of an ongoing investigation alleging the girl raped your nephew, the police also arrested and charged your nephew with the same crime. You say the sex was consensual, so one must follow the other. ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/208 "2011-01-18T19:30:44Z")
> [@Walmarticus](#): > > Do you have any reason to suspect this girl was intending to accuse him of raping her? I’d really hate to think you’d ruin an innocent girl’s life due to paranoia. That’s actually her plan. The girl is white, therefore, the girls’ parents WILL press report her nephew for statutory rape, because white folks is like that. No, she’s got no reason other than her paranoia. She just wants to find enough people (on this board or in real life, like her so-called attorney, and this newly-mentioned family friend) who will tell her “Yea! Stick it to those white people!” ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/209 "2011-01-18T19:44:07Z")
> [@Kolga](#): > > No, she’s got no reason other than her paranoia. She just wants to find enough people (on this board or in real life, like her so-called attorney, and this newly-mentioned family friend) who will tell her “Yea! Stick it to those white people!” I believe the nephew already has. ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/210 "2011-01-18T19:46:25Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > I believe the nephew already has. I LOL’d. My hallmates are giving me funny looks. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/211 "2011-01-18T19:57:26Z")
I’m still trying to figure out exactly how **ZPG** got “legal” custody of her nephew just because his dad is on an offshore rig. I mean, it’s not as if the father ceases to exist from a legal standpoint because he’s offshore. And what happened to the mom here? **ZPG** , does the father know anything at all about what’s going on? Have you even tried to contact him? Did the attorney say anything about that? To be honest I am struggling to believe that this situation is real. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/212 "2011-01-18T19:59:27Z")
Oh, and then there’s this: > [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > **The phone’s been destroyed out of fear of possible porn charges. I’ve searched his room and destroyed everything else that might be incriminating** , but I am certain there is stuff out in cyberspace. My attorney has been informed, I’m wondering what else I need to do. **One idea that has been floated by my attorney no less that since Nephew X is below the age of consent and I have a good relationship with the police is to file a compliant that Nephew X has been raped** , but I don’t see the situation working out where Nephew X would actually be considered the victim. Any ideas? Yeah, what did your attorney say about your evidence-destroying spree right before pondering whether it was a good idea to file rape charges against Nephew X’s girlfriend? ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/213 "2011-01-18T20:11:18Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > So. Let me get this straight. You’re wondering if you should falsely accuse a girl of rape so she won’t accuse your nephew of rape. And you’re sending your nephew to someone who will tell him how _other_ cultures are hotbeds of false rape accusations. Ooookay. I’ve been trying my damndest to stay out of this hotbed of insanity here, but I had to quote this in the hopes that\*\* ZPG\*\* would read and respond to it. Please, **ZPG** , if your internet speeds up to the point where you can reply…please respond to this. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/214 "2011-01-18T20:12:05Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Can you explain how a “slow internet” kept you from posting what state you live in while letting you make numerous posts on other issues? Knew she made a claim in the past, didn’t want to contradict it, and the slow connection made the Search keep timing out? ---
**Author:** ![Who\_me\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/958977/32.png) [@Who\_me\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Who_me_1)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/215 "2011-01-18T20:16:33Z")
> [@Duke](#): > > Oh, and then there’s this: > > Yeah, what did your attorney say about your evidence-destroying spree right before pondering whether it was a good idea to file rape charges against Nephew X’s girlfriend? Good point, destruction of evidence is, I believe a felony in most jurisdictions. And of course, since the kids were both underage, if one gets charges pressed… they both will. But… the thread title asks what would I do in that situation. I’d kill my nephew… he could get in trouble otherwise. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/216 "2011-01-18T20:18:03Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > victim of underage sex. Band name!😛 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/217 "2011-01-18T20:21:38Z")
Technically, isn’t **ZPG** calling for harassment? And couldn’t the girl’s parents counter sue for defamation? I’d see about a restraining order against this woman. **ZPG** , do you know ANYTHING at all about the girl’s parents, other than that they’re allegedly “WASP”? (Which again, is not the same thing as “white”) ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/218 "2011-01-18T20:34:33Z")
You know, I noticed something else in the OP: **ZPG** claims she has a “good relationship with the police.” Well, if she has an in with local law enforcement, why is she so terribly afraid that her nephew will be unjustly accused of rape? 'Cause I’m telling you, you better have a _damn_ good relationship with the police to even think that claiming “that 16-year-old girl raped my 16-year-old nephew” had a hope in hell of going anywhere. ---
**Author:** ![Weedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weedy/32/301_2.png) [@Weedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weedy)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/219 "2011-01-18T21:15:41Z")
ZPG, to answer your OP, I wouldn’t be in a hurry to get the police involved myself. Once you start that process, you have no control over where it goes. It seems like you have police contacts, so maybe you could ask a question or two about underage sex complaints and see what their procedure is for investigating them, but I wouldn’t even do that, myself. If the girl, or her family, bring accusations of statutory rape, then she is equally guilty, so it is not exactly a problem (plus, there is the Romeo and Juliet thing). Forcible rape is a whole nother can of worms, but it is not a free ride for her. Plus, if she is his girlfriend there is not any reason for her to do that. Why would she want to destroy his life when she presumably likes him, at least enough to have sex with him. It’s a lot of hassle for her, as well. But if you go to the police, and pit them against each other, then you give her a motive, to save herself. My main legal worry would be the phone pics, and where else they might be. I’d want to have a discussion with my nephew about that, and try to limit the spread if I could. Yet another reason not to go to the police, since I wouldn’t want them digging around. My other concerns would be around my nephew, and his emotional well-being. Even though it may or may not be illegal, having a girl-friend, having sex with his girl-friend are pretty normal things for him to do at his age, and a precursor to growing up, getting married, etc. He should be worrying more about what to get her for her birthday than whether or not to file rape charges against her. I don’t want him doing illegal stuff, but I also don’t want to totally mess up his attitude towards relationships and the opposite sex, so I’d have a talk with him but I wouldn’t start a war. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028/220 "2011-01-18T21:16:20Z")
> [@Duke](#): > > I’m still trying to figure out exactly how **ZPG** got “legal” custody of her nephew just because his dad is on an offshore rig. I mean, it’s not as if the father ceases to exist from a legal standpoint because he’s offshore. And what happened to the mom here? > > **ZPG** , does the father know anything at all about what’s going on? Have you even tried to contact him? Did the attorney say anything about that? > > To be honest I am struggling to believe that this situation is real. Nephew X’s mother doesn’t like any children by that husband, so she signed away as much custody to his father when she left, divorced, and remarried, legally and culturally abandoning the kid. She has said she wished Nephew X didn’t exist or died. Nephew X’s dad is working offshore. Somebody has to be on hand to sign legal documents, keep an eye on the kid. He’s not emancipated, nor is he able to be emancipated. He goes to high school (which IMHO is what he should be doing) and is not self-supporting. Somebody had to take responsibility. The Father is not a role model, considers getting laid a competitive sport, and sometimes comments that he would like to have sex with the teenage girls his sons know. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-do-teenage-sex-question/568028.md?page=12)