# What would you tolerate in the (almost) perfect mate? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 14, 2000, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178 "2000-11-14T18:28:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![slackergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@slackergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slackergirl)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2000, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178/21 "2000-11-16T20:27:25Z")
I’m with FairyChatMom. There are a lot of things I’ll put up with, but blind stupidity and selfishness I won’t (old example: he drinks, I don’t, he downs a few too many and refuses to let me drive him home, I take the bus and find a new boyfriend). If he’s a slob, I’ll hire a maid. I can read while he watches football. I can deal with way-out-there family issues, as long as he makes an effort with mine. I guess I don’t really have a type. My exes have all been radically different. Of course it is very generous of me to make these allowances for men, because I am absolutely perfect in every way and would never annoy, bore, or completely gross out anyone with my behavior. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2000, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178/22 "2000-11-16T20:59:27Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Falcon_ > **_tiny voice_ Please?** :runs up to Falcon, hugs her, smooches the hell out of her, then runs back to the Church of the Visible Pink Foreskin: You coming or what? ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2000, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178/23 "2000-11-16T22:19:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Falcon \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by lurkernomore \* > > Falcon, > > Dragonlady is right. Better nobody than someone bad. I know it hurts, but she is right. > > > > Want a hug? > > \*\* > > _tiny voice_ Please? \*\* ``` Tiny voices sound like they need big hugs ``` ::hug :: You know, if a NEW MOD wanted to get off on the right foot with the Teeming 10,000, they’d get a hug smiley… ---
**Author:** ![Nocturne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/9fc348/32.png) [@Nocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nocturne)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2000, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178/24 "2000-11-16T23:03:59Z")
I can put up with everything, except: 1. Lying/Cheating 2. Trying to change me for his benefit 3. Bigots/Racists/Etc. Religious orientation doesn’t matter and neither does color, in my book. I don’t care what’s in your past as long as you don’t carry it to the present, and looks don’t matter to me. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2000, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178/25 "2000-11-16T23:16:19Z")
Though I have batted zero in this department I am prepared to give a fair answer. Things I can tolerate: _Smoking._ Both of my parents smoked. However, a chain-smoker–or someone who constantly coughs, or spends too much money on smoking, would test my patience. _A crusty attitude, or some swearing._ Again, I am accustomed to this from my relatives. If someone has dropped the occasional four-letter word into their conversation–as quite a few people I have know have done–I can live with that. Someone whose vocabulary is half profanity/obscenity–that’s another story. _Slight carelessness in dress/grooming/finances._ I have lived in a glass house here and I know better than to throw stones. _Specific tastes in clothes/food/entertainment._ OK, so maybe she doesn’t like steaks (she may be a vegetarian), or ham (maybe she comes from a Jewish family) or exotic foreign foods (she may have digestive problems. What’s the big deal? You don’t like tamales/sukiyaki/gyros? So we’ll go to a Howard Johnson’s or Denny’s and have steak and eggs, or halibut with onions. Things I _don’t_ tolerate, because I have suffered from them: _The Chatty-Cathy syndrome._ One woman I know won’t use 20 or 30 words where she can use 200 or 300. I think she’ll be done when she says “The bottom line…” and she continues for 30 minutes or more (literally!!) She once called me up after I got home–I was working a swing shift–and kept me unwillingly on the phone for over an hour when I wanted to sleep! _A nasty attitude._ One woman I know made insulting remarks to her own parents–in their owm home! She even insulted her father’s elderly uncle when I was present. (Her father angrily bawled her out.) She also called _my_ mother a “bitch” once–and only retracted it when I angrily told her I wouldn’t tolerate that from her. _A whining attitude about food,_ specifically in restaurants. This same woman–named Sheila–often sent food back, and one time whined, after we left (she insisted the food was _spoiled,)_ than her Jewish ancestry made her moroe particular. (I pointed out that the Jewish Scriptures frown on such snobbishness. And I was hurt that she actually thought I was going to have her poisoned. Yeah, right.) I’m sorry if this sounds like a rant. But my feelings on this topic are quite strong. ☹ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-tolerate-in-the-almost-perfect-mate/41178.md?page=1)