# What would you want to do on my alternate Earth? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 12, 2013, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666 "2013-09-12T15:25:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/1 "2013-09-12T15:25:46Z")
I created a machine that can transport matter to and from an identically parallel Earth. The only twist is that on this Earth, primates never evolved into anything more intelligent than chimpanzees. Our line never branched off from the common ancestor. No humans, no neanderthals, no homo floresiensis, nothing – if it was more man than ape, it never existed on this Earth. So we’ve got a pristine, wild Earth. Unpolluted, uncivilized, and not so much as a pottery shard or any sign of man. I’ll send you and whatever/whoever you can fit into a standard shipping container (40x8x8 or so). What would you want to do there? Me? I’d love to fish it. I could just imagine the lakes, rivers, and seas teeming with fish that have never seen a lure before and are free of mercury and PBCs. I’d also love a North American safari/trek if only to see if any charismatic mega-fauna from the Pleistocene thrived in our absence. I can only imagine what the massive old-growth forests would be like. ---
**Author:** ![Greg\_Charles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Greg\_Charles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greg_Charles)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/2 "2013-09-12T15:46:43Z")
I’d go to the fjords, and see if I could find Slartibartfast’s signature. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/3 "2013-09-12T15:46:47Z")
Kentucky Fried Dodo and Carrier Pigeon stew. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/4 "2013-09-12T15:50:46Z")
I’d just want to explore, and see what there is to see. Hope that container can hold a well stocked all wheel drive RV… ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/5 "2013-09-12T18:59:10Z")
Set up a calendar and count the days until my new world bacteria wipes out everything. Then come back. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/6 "2013-09-12T20:08:29Z")
Yosemite Valley with no other tourists? Sign me up! (Can I keep the gateway open, so I can traipse back and forth, like, to use the bathroom and get pizza and maybe hide from a bear?) ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/7 "2013-09-12T20:32:19Z")
And just why would the fish be free of mercury? PCBs, yes, but mercury? And are you sure that fish have evolved to avoid lures? Most animals would be just as wary since there are plenty of predators besides us, at least on the large continents. Me, I rather stay here with modern medicine. ---
**Author:** ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/8 "2013-09-12T21:07:44Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > Set up a calendar and count the days until my new world bacteria wipes out everything. Then come back. What are you planning on doing to those animals!? Seriously, interspecies diseases would be minimal given that the two most common hosts for interspecies disease spreading are chickens (which might not even exist or be geographically isolated) and domestic hogs (which would be wild, and not living in the close proximity required for transfer of disease). ---
**Author:** ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/9 "2013-09-12T21:14:34Z")
> [@Hari\_Seldon](#): > > And just why would the fish be free of mercury? PCBs, yes, but mercury? And are you sure that fish have evolved to avoid lures? Most animals would be just as wary since there are plenty of predators besides us, at least on the large continents. > > Me, I rather stay here with modern medicine. Because we dumped the mercury. Naturally occurring oil and heavy metals pollution is dwarfed by what we’ve done in just a century. Heavily fished areas do seem to develop a lure type awareness. Regardless of whether that proves out, naturally regulated balanced fish ecosystems would put our current populations to shame. It would be like the early days of cod and halibut fishing only better. You’re the only boat out there. ETA: you can come back; it’s not a one way trip. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/10 "2013-09-12T21:18:39Z")
It sounds very pretty, but I’m very much a modern times and technology girl. I got dragged around to all the hunting/fishing/camping crap I could stand when I was a kid. NOT fun for a girl who’s a solid city girl at heart. All of the things I love involve modern society and technology. So I’d not be one to sign up. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/11 "2013-09-12T21:24:34Z")
Unless they have air conditioning and indoor plumbing, include me out. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/12 "2013-09-12T23:49:27Z")
It might be cool to go on a hot air balloon trip over an undeveloped Manhattan, just for the mindscrewy-ness of it. After that, I’m out of there. Nature sucks, get me back to the city. ---
**Author:** ![Bibliovore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Bibliovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bibliovore)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/13 "2013-09-13T13:49:35Z")
I’d have the shipping container converted to a comfortable, liveable cabin that’s capable of sustaining me “off-grid”, with solar panels, a kitchen with propane, a comfy bed, the works…It’d be heaven to use it as the ultimate retreat for a week or so. ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/14 "2013-09-13T16:07:26Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > It might be cool to go on a hot air balloon trip over an undeveloped Manhattan, just for the mindscrewy-ness of it. > … It’s kind of weird to picture, but there were actually farms on Manhattan in the 1600’s. Country roads, take me home, to the place, I belong, New York City… ---
**Author:** ![DrumBum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e79b87/32.png) [@DrumBum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrumBum)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/15 "2013-09-13T16:28:53Z")
I would like to watch the entry and impact of the meteor that created the Barringer Crater in Arizona. From a safe distance, of course. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Uber\_the\_Goober](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/58956e/32.png) [@Uber\_the\_Goober](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uber_the_Goober)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/16 "2013-09-13T17:03:20Z")
Unless I also get immortality, no thanks. If I do, then I’m exploring 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/17 "2013-09-13T17:38:27Z")
Set myself up on one of the larger oil wells that history states should exist and make myself one of the most powerful people on New Earth by selling said petroleum to other newly-arrived settlers. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/18 "2013-09-13T18:41:17Z")
In the event of the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse on Earth Prime (this planet), FeralEarth (human-free Earth in the OP) would be my ultimate Bug Out Lair I’d create an off-grid self sufficient dwelling (log cabin with a huge underground living area) to escape to, along with a selection of attractive female companions, the outdoorsy self sufficient type, gotta live in harmony with the planet ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/19 "2013-09-13T18:50:07Z")
> [@drastic\_quench](#): > > What are you planning on doing to those animals!? > > Seriously, interspecies diseases would be minimal given that the two most common hosts for interspecies disease spreading are chickens (which might not even exist or be geographically isolated) and domestic hogs (which would be wild, and not living in the close proximity required for transfer of disease). Understood. Just a hyperbolic way of saying “These things never work out well”. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666/20 "2013-09-13T19:06:30Z")
There’re probably several tropical paradises with edible wild fruit and drinkable water. I’ll take one of those. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-you-want-to-do-on-my-alternate-earth/668666.md?page=2)