# What would your Honest personal ad say? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 8, 2002, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491 "2002-09-08T01:27:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Tiburon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e36b37/32.png) [@Tiburon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tiburon)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2002, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/141 "2002-11-20T22:46:37Z")
_blink_ ---
**Author:** ![SexyGayGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/779978/32.png) [@SexyGayGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SexyGayGirl)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2002, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/142 "2002-11-20T23:01:56Z")
Has my ad just worked? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Blalron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Blalron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blalron)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/143 "2002-11-21T03:36:38Z")
18 year old eccentric male, High School Senior with “B” average, unemployed, living in father’s basement, seeking single female 18-24. Must like watching movies, cuddling on the couch, and intellectual conversations. If ONLY that would work! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Genseric](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Genseric](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Genseric)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/144 "2002-11-21T04:06:04Z")
Wow, it’s neat to see this thing pop back up. We’ve been fairly low-key about it, but I guess this is as good a place and time as any to announce that **bristlesage** and I met via this thread, and are now (and have been for a while) officially a couple. So don’t be coy about it, honesty can work. And send those e-mails, people! What do you have to lose? ---
**Author:** ![Eidolon909](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce7236/32.png) [@Eidolon909](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eidolon909)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/145 "2002-11-21T14:13:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jenner \* > \*\*Male, 24. Moody, reclusive, no ambition, no job, no social skills. Extremely creative, talented, and intelligent but crippled by stifling inferiority complex and intense fear of rejection. Has rationalized this with deeply existential perspective on human life and Zen-like acceptance of fate. Experienced bachelor with excellent cooking, cleaning, and laundry skills. Unsure about wanting kids. Seeks beautiful young female to massage ego and live up to ridiculously high standards. \*\* I think they must have cloned us at birth. Except for the cooking, cleaning and laundry bit. Bleah. ---
**Author:** ![DirkGntly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DirkGntly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DirkGntly)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/146 "2002-11-21T14:26:49Z")
Honest, huh? Ok, I can do honest… 33yo WM, hopelessly straight, 6’0" overweight (250lbs) but strong, with beard and flattop haircut. Used to wear glasses but LASIK fixed that. Somewhat controlling, but attentive. A little “clingy” but devoted. Loves Star Trek and the original 3 Star Wars movies. Not into Star Trek or Star Wars lit. Non-smoker, occasional social drinker. Loves dogs, tolerates cats, hates cities, loves the country. Politically conservative, and gun-owner, hunter. Works in IT. Does woodworking/cabinetry in spare time to unwind and take a mental break. Drug free. Loves sex and knows where and exactly how to humm on a woman’s body. YOU: 5’2"-5’9", caucasian, large breasts (C or larger), non-smoker, no tattoos. Must love sex and receiving _ahem_ “lip” attention (figure it out, heheheh - didn’t want to get too graphic in this thread 😉 ). I have a pic [here](http://galaxybilliards.homestead.com/dirk.html). ---
**Author:** ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/147 "2002-11-21T14:35:14Z")
Congrats **Genseric**!!! How cool is THAT! 😃 Folks, I started this thread, and I must admit, I loved some of the replies here. I actually wrote a personal ad (my own words and a few borrowed lines) , and took a picture first thing Sunday morning (sans makeup and hairbrush) and posted it on Yahoo, just to see what would happen. I got the usual assortment of loonie replies, and silly pictures of muscle men, and took it down after a week. It was fun, but I’ve had my fill of nutcases for now. If there was a Doper out there though, … 😉 I’d sure consider it! ---
**Author:** ![bristlesage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@bristlesage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bristlesage)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/148 "2002-11-21T19:03:08Z")
Yeah, Dopers. I recommend them to all my friends. ---
**Author:** ![rubes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@rubes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rubes)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/149 "2002-11-21T19:06:43Z")
swm version 3.3. Computer animator, Email Administrator, Performance Artist. 1 teen son living with his mother. I am creative, patient, loyal, funny and quirky. I am interested in finding a female who will challenge me mentally, make me laugh, and be willing to grow together. Experience life with me, and you may never see things in the same view again. If we don’t laugh together and if we can’t hold a conversation together, we won’t be together. ---
**Author:** ![LittleBabyNothing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b38774/32.png) [@LittleBabyNothing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LittleBabyNothing)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/150 "2002-11-21T20:26:11Z")
16 year old english brunette, thin, 5"7, intelligent, good sense of humour, seeks girly boy with same interests preferably 17+. I like music, i play the guitar, im a ballerina and i enjoy reading. i also enjoy daytime tv (yay richard and judy!), food (if i eat any more coco pops today im gonna be sick), movies, and i hate all forms of excercise and meat. I think that sums me up quite nicely. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2002, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/151 "2002-11-21T21:33:35Z")
SWM, 24. wheelchair user, bearded, eyeglasses, thinning hair, nonsmoker, social drinker. I’m a total lazy slob w/no direction or motivation in my life. Still at home, unemployed, lousy student (see above). ISO SW/AF 18-30, for quiet hometime, lots of sex, and not much else. Must be be N/S, D/D free. ---
**Author:** ![SexyGayGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/779978/32.png) [@SexyGayGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SexyGayGirl)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2002, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/152 "2002-11-22T03:07:09Z")
Just thought I would let you guys know that some butt ugly woman just responded to my ad and asked me how much I would pay her for a lap dance. EWWWWW. SexyGayGal ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2002, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/153 "2002-11-22T03:26:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > ::tosses his hair flirtaciously:: > > :: ponders flexing:: > > ::figures she knows where that picture is:: > > Oh. Me? 5’10" 160 lb bisexual agnostic atheist seeks someone interesting and attractive between 18 and … 28? I don’t really care. I’ve had the hots for women almost in their 50s before. > > Enjoys computers, computer-related things and languages. Accents a definite plus. The right smile will captivate me forever. Taken. Possible third wheels (hey, tricycles are cool;)) must be bisexual and appeal to both of us. ---
**Author:** ![Tiburon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e36b37/32.png) [@Tiburon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tiburon)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2002, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/154 "2002-11-22T04:12:42Z")
Oooo, met cute girl last night. Almost asked her, “What would your honest personals ad say?” Count me as still lookin’ 😛 Tibs. ---
**Author:** ![Carcosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b3f665/32.png) [@Carcosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carcosa)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2002, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/155 "2002-11-22T05:44:04Z")
39 year-old male. 6’0" average looks. Enjoys tying girls up and spanking them. Conducts impromptu science experiments in basement occassionaly leading to small explosions and manageable house fires. Seeks caring, sensitive, intelligent female that doesn’t mind wearing high heels in the bathtub. ---
**Author:** ![Marconi\_Schmeese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ea666f/32.png) [@Marconi\_Schmeese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marconi_Schmeese)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2002, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/156 "2002-11-22T14:47:58Z")
Blond, blue eyes, 5’3", no longer a size 2. MBA degree in Strategic Management of Entrepreneurship, now own large toy store with sales of $1M+ at age of 27. Expect you to be as smart and successful (or more so) than I am. Must be able to use chopsticks and eat at the Ritz without being intimidated. Must be able to put up with my raging obsessive compulsive disorder, which incurs huge therapy and drug bills. Must have quick wit and dry sense of humor to get along with me. I can be a total psycho at times and you must know when to back off. Racists and zealots need not apply. ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2002, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/157 "2002-11-22T15:05:22Z")
Tall 6’ SWM who lives with his mother and enjoys sleepovers at hetero buddy’s house. Enjoys wargaming, PC gaming, and going to strip clubs. Occasional bed-wetter. ---
**Author:** ![cherry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cherry)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2002, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/158 "2002-11-26T05:42:09Z")
okay i’ll bite umm hetro female 29, black wavy hair, brownish reddish eye color depends on the light i guess, petite, likes bikes motorcycles, pillion is okay, techie geek, well networking mostly, I like watching movies, mostly a homebody, I guess i need to get away from my computer more… (how am i sounding so far?) looks stoned most of the time, but honestly that is my natural expression… has many friends, two pets, and likes run on sentences apparently… i cant think of anything else at the moment so i will leave it at that. ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2002, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/159 "2002-11-26T07:27:50Z")
SWM, 19, seeks female to take pity on his sorry ass. Likes wrestling, sports, computers, reading. Favorite movies: Mallrats, Ghostbusters, MST3K:TM, Office Space, Bull Durham. Enjoys fried foods, meat, and cereals. Can be sarcastic and cynical if provoked. Opposed to current government regime, especially Ashcroft. Finds Lewis Black, David Cross, and Eddie Izzard funny. That about sums it up. -brianjedi ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2002, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491/160 "2002-11-26T08:55:26Z")
29 year old male, 5’10", green eyes, dark brown hair w/ flecks of gray, sarcastic, sharp sense of humor that can sometimes border on cruel, and a Narcissistic personality looking for someone who can put up with my shit. Will alternate between sweetly self-deprecating to painfully arrogant in a matter of minutes. Must not mind tattoos, laziness, an extreme devotion to baseball, and an attachment to the PS2. Into art, literature, film, collecting comic books (yes - at my age), and has a small collection of Daffy Duck trinkets that you may find either hilarious or disturbing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-would-your-honest-personal-ad-say/127491.md?page=9)