# What's a gal gotta do? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 12, 2003, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798 "2003-11-12T12:33:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/21 "2003-11-13T02:27:22Z")
I’m all for the “start with casual conversation” approach. After all, you don’t really know this guy too well, right? This’ll give you a chance to suss him out and see both whether or not he’s attached and whether or not there’s anything between you other than a little physical attraction. And please tell us how it goes. We _are_ a nosy bunch around here. ---
**Author:** ![Extraneous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/0ea827/32.png) [@Extraneous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Extraneous)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/22 "2003-11-13T02:28:07Z")
There’s always the classic: _ **So, you any good?** _ 😃 Seriously: guys love to talk about themselves (at least 98% - look out for the other 2% - those, the neighbors are quoted post-facto: “He was always the quiet type - kept to himself, mostly”). Give him a chance to blabber, and you’ll probably know more about him than you want to. p.s. - cleavage works well too. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/23 "2003-11-13T04:12:33Z")
Get some safe group activity, ie group dancing, company picnic, poetry reading, or whatever the hell it is English singles do in their spare time besides, drink, watch the telly and wank, that you can reasonably claim a group of you are going to, and invite him to come along, or you can try the old “I’ve got an extra ticket” ploy, or you can try shaking your tits at him. ---
**Author:** ![SunTzu2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5a626/32.png) [@SunTzu2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunTzu2U)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/24 "2003-11-13T06:51:26Z")
Why not ask “So how’s your love life?” You’d be surprised what people will tell you. ---
**Author:** ![SJSB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@SJSB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SJSB)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/25 "2003-11-13T10:46:36Z")
Well, so far it’s a toss between going hell for leather and just asking him right out… no harm in a girl trying, eh? The other option is to go easy on him and just try and build up conversation slowly. Thanks for all the advice though, I will be working on it 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Algorithm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/algorithm/32/12204_2.png) [@Algorithm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algorithm)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/26 "2003-11-13T17:17:01Z")
Touch him casually (during conversation), on the arm or lower back (sometimes even the thigh), at every opportunity. Try not to look awkward, but even if it is, the point gets across. ---
**Author:** ![SJSB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@SJSB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SJSB)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/27 "2003-11-13T17:36:38Z")
I’m not the most tactful of people, but I **do** have a cunning plan. I know he likes cars - BMWs - so, I’m going to talk to him about them. **SJSB** : So, you like cars huh? **Bloke** : Yes - do you? **SJSB** : No, but I’d like to see your back seat. Then I guess we’ll take it from there… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/28 "2003-11-13T18:01:30Z")
:eek: Oh, my. ---
**Author:** ![aerodave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f08c70/32.png) [@aerodave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aerodave)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/29 "2003-11-13T18:10:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SJSB \* > \*\*I’m not the most tactful of people, but I **do** have a cunning plan. I know he likes cars - BMWs - so, I’m going to talk to him about them. > **SJSB** : So, you like cars huh? > **Bloke** : Yes - do you? > **SJSB** : No, but I’d like to see your back seat. > > Then I guess we’ll take it from there… 😃 \*\* Now THAT’S what I’m talkin’ about! 😃 Way to go! ---
**Author:** ![SJSB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@SJSB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SJSB)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/30 "2003-11-13T18:11:15Z")
Lol. What??? It’s a plan… I have to do something soon, because my supervisor knows and she thinks it’s hilarious whenever he comes in the shop. I don’t want to take a day off, only to go back to work and find that she did that stupid: “Hey, you know that girl who works here in the mornings? Yeah, she really fancies you.” So, my best option is to just find the (metaphorical) balls, and ask him myself. It could be embarrasing, but the above alternative sure ain’t pretty either… ---
**Author:** ![dal\_timgar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@dal\_timgar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dal_timgar)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/31 "2003-11-13T22:29:58Z")
I like dragonladies with style. I’m sort of a Mae West fan. Try something witty and slightly suggestive. What kind of business is this? Maybe something relates. Is this a hardware store? ---
**Author:** ![merge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9f8e36/32.png) [@merge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/merge)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/32 "2003-11-13T22:41:59Z")
This is honestly very easy… This is all you have to say… “Hey, are you single” If he isn’t, he will say no… If he is and he IS NOT interested he will say no… If he is and IS interested, he will say yes… Men are a very simple species… ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/33 "2003-11-13T23:07:08Z")
I vote for directness. Many guys, even if they’re interested, are just too clueless and timid to realize that you like them and would go out with them if they worked up the nerve to ask. So, either ask him if he wants to get some dinner or something, or say something suggestive that makes it clear you’re interested (i.e. something along the lines of the backseat remark) and see what he does. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/34 "2003-11-14T00:34:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*I vote for directness. Many guys, even if they’re interested, are just too clueless and timid to realize that you like them and would go out with them if they worked up the nerve to ask. So, either ask him if he wants to get some dinner or something, or say something suggestive that makes it clear you’re interested (i.e. something along the lines of the backseat remark) and see what he does. \*\* I second this! We can be very, very, very, very, muy clueless. No, really. I mean it. I know, it’s hard to believe. ---
**Author:** ![Susanann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@Susanann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susanann)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/35 "2003-11-14T01:38:33Z")
Why dont you ask him if he is married? It is a simple question, and that is all you need to know. That is all he needs to know if he is interested in you. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/36 "2003-11-14T05:02:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Susanann \* > \*\*Why dont you ask him if he is married? It is a simple question, and that is all you need to know. That is all he needs to know if he is interested in you. \*\* Erm, I think we’re all assuming she’s checked out his ring finger. And if he’s married but not wearing a ring, she probably oughtn’t go ahead with this … ---
**Author:** ![SJSB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@SJSB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SJSB)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/37 "2003-11-14T11:55:05Z")
Yes, I have checked out his ring finger - nothing there. Not really much to update on, as he didn’t come in today. ☹ I was away yesterday, so the thought has crossed my mind that my supervisor said something… but I won’t get paranoid about it. There could be 1001 reasons why he didn’t show. Anyhow, I’m all geared up for next time I see him. If I still can’t find the guts to ask him right out, then I’ll make conversation, at least. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798/38 "2003-11-14T20:14:03Z")
Hope that he ain’t like me. 😉 Unless you like to use subtletly along the lines of “Hi, I’ve been trying to think of ways of getting you to notice me and make the first move and I haven’t come up with any good ideas yet” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-a-gal-gotta-do/212798.md?page=1)