# What's Behind This BIZARRE Custom of Nude Calendars? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 26, 2004, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160 "2004-01-26T15:19:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/1 "2004-01-26T15:19:36Z")
It seems like every run-down burg in America is raising money by posing a bunch of old farts/bags and making up those horrible calendars! Well, let me state: NO, I DO NOT want to see a bunch of ugly people minus their clothes! What’s wrong with sticking to female supermodels? Hell, I’llbuy a Sports Illustrated-style calendar to benefit a CHARITY-BUT i WON’T PAY A CENT FOR FOR 60-YEAR OLDS. aND NOW,we have to see movies like “Calendar Girls”-yechh! ---
**Author:** ![WernhamHogg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a587f6/32.png) [@WernhamHogg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WernhamHogg)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/2 "2004-01-26T15:31:07Z")
I missed the edict where we HAVE to see Calendar Girls. Also, I have no idea what you’re talking about. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/3 "2004-01-26T15:43:55Z")
Could be worse. (Could be raining) Those old men could be making clock faces. Guess what the hour “hand” would be? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/4 "2004-01-26T16:26:07Z")
[topic=off] What’s up with old guys in locker rooms at the gym/ swimming pool, etc. that blow dry their ball sacks in front of everyone. Why do they do that? Is there some health benefit to blow drying my bag that I’m completely unaware of? Also, is there something that happens around age 60 that makes your crank grow four feet longer or were guys just better hung two generations ago? Maybe these questions are better for GQ… [/topic] ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/5 "2004-01-26T16:37:15Z")
The film ‘calendar girls’ shows the _ahem_ true story of the ‘original’ joke-nude calendar. And yes, it sounds boring. As does the whole idea of risque calendars. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/6 "2004-01-26T16:38:17Z")
Yeah! Anyone who doesn’t pass the stringent “Sexually Attractive to **Ralph24c** ” Test should have their clothing super-glued onto them so they don’t accidentally show any skin and offend his sensibilities! I mean, how _dare_ they! What if he accidentally saw a saggy arm or double chin on the street somewhere and lost his permanent hard-on?! These damned ugly people should be taken out back and shot, and their bodies quickly buried out of sight. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/7 "2004-01-26T16:46:03Z")
Well, not only do they have the effrontery to be old and ugly in the first place, but apparently roving gangs of them are accosting poor **ralph124c** and forcing him to peruse calenders and see movies _against his will_! The horror! ---
**Author:** ![Joachim\_Pieper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Joachim\_Pieper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joachim_Pieper)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/8 "2004-01-26T16:46:07Z")
Fair enough, but a certain amount of body fascism is healthy, surely? I mean, one should never impose one’s genitals on anyone else… Cheers… ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/9 "2004-01-26T17:20:33Z")
Uh-oh, **Diogenes** asked a GQ! Men ought to dry off their danglies after a shower, lest they catch the dreaded tropical crotch-rot. (Tinea versicolor et al.) “'Ere, love, wanna see a new disease I learned in the army?” Trinopus ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/10 "2004-01-26T18:03:15Z")
Well, presumably, guys should dry their testicles thoroughly so they don’t get fungal infections (just like you should dry your feet and between your toes thoroughly to avoid athlete’s foot). I should think that blow-drying would do the job more thoroughly and efficiently than toweling. (Plus, if you keep toweling and toweling, you get people wondering what’s up with the old guy who keeps rubbing his balls in the locker room.) As for the OP, don’t buy the fucking calender or go see the movie, then. Hell, get you one of those sleep mask/blindfold things to wear during sex, so you don’t have to see a non-supermodel naked. I don’t really see that going over well with most women, but with that sort of attitude, I imagine most women would be unwilling to sleep with you anyway. Oh, and you’d better wear it in the shower when you get get older, lest you see a naked old fart. Personally, I’d buy one of those calenders long before I’d buy anything from SI, whether we’re talking charity or not. Why? Well, because I have no sexual interest in women whatsoever, and that’s the whole point of SI swimsuit stuff, to drool over sexy women. I do, however, have an aesthetic appreciation for well-done nude art, and from my understanding the calenders under discussion are done in a manner to fall under the heading of nude art. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/11 "2004-01-26T18:04:50Z")
The origin of calendars is [here](http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/lrf-/fundraising/calendar_girls.htm#what). I guess some folks prefer jacking off to super models than giving money to leukemia research :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2004, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/12 "2004-01-26T18:16:58Z")
**Joachim** , people should not impose their genitals on the unwilling, no. (We had a very thorough discussion of this last summer, in a thread about someone being quite thoroughly flashed at the gym by a gent whose shorts were far, far too loose.) However, we’re not talking about marauding bands of naked old people who wrestle you to the ground, hold your eyes open, and shove their wrinkled genitals right in your face. We’re talking about people who have chosen to appear nude in a calendar or movie, which you have to make an active effort to see. If you don’t want to see these people naked, all you have to do is not buy the calendar or the movie ticket. It really doesn’t get any easier to avoid something. ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/13 "2004-01-27T00:55:52Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > marauding bands of naked old people who wrestle you to the ground, hold your eyes open, and shove their wrinkled genitals right in your face Very long band name! ---
**Author:** ![Farmwoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8dc957/32.png) [@Farmwoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmwoman)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/14 "2004-01-27T01:59:48Z")
If this sort of thing makes you gag, good cause notwithstanding, you can be sure you’re not the target donor. My favorite is (not) [Wearing Wool](http://www.wearingwool.com/cpcale.html). ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/15 "2004-01-27T02:05:04Z")
> [@Tapioca Dextrin](#): > > The origin of calendars is [here](http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/lrf-/fundraising/calendar_girls.htm#what). I guess some folks prefer jacking off to super models than giving money to leukemia research :rolleyes: I can do both … (I’ve nothing against the WI calendar, BTW. Also, I’m by no means an ideal physical shape, but, even so, I’ve been known to take my clothes off. So poot to the OP.) ---
**Author:** ![schplebordnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@schplebordnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/schplebordnik)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/16 "2004-01-27T04:36:45Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > Also, is there something that happens around age 60 that makes your crank grow four feet longer or were guys just better hung two generations ago? It’s called “gravity.” Whereas the gals have gravity effect them by slowly pulling those perky young things down to saggy old things, us guys have the advantage of having gravity work for us. Hence the common locker room phenomenon of the wrinkled old dude with the nutsack hanging down to about mid-thigh. ---
**Author:** ![sunstone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunstone/32/3372_2.png) [@sunstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sunstone)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/17 "2004-01-27T04:55:17Z")
Ssshhhh…don’t tell anyone…Calendar Girls wasn’t really about a calendar with naked ladies of a certain age… Yes, there was a calendar that was in the film, but the story really was about taking chances, breaking loose from convention, and an honoring of a well-loved man. The movie was great, but the audience was about 5 men to about 100 women. It was funny and inspiring. And yes, I do like to look at naked ladies, being a “regular” guy. That’s why there are pictures of naked ladies (and naked men, I suppose) Nearly every woman that I’ve known has beauty. Just don’t look at the ones you don’t find attractive; I’ll look for you. ---
**Author:** ![Brutus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Brutus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brutus)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/18 "2004-01-27T04:55:25Z")
> [@Tapioca Dextrin](#): > > The origin of calendars is [here](http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/lrf-/fundraising/calendar_girls.htm#what). I guess some folks prefer jacking off to super models than giving money to leukemia research :rolleyes: Because giving money to super models and jerking off to leukemia research would be fucked up. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/19 "2004-01-27T05:36:28Z")
> [@Farmwoman](#): > > If this sort of thing makes you gag, good cause notwithstanding, you can be sure you’re not the target donor. > > My favorite is (not) [Wearing Wool](http://www.wearingwool.com/cpcale.html). From the link: “Both serious and playful, the calendar documents our lives and our love of fiber.” Bwahahaha! ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2004, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160/20 "2004-01-27T07:27:45Z")
Another thread where someone is complaining about women showing skin? Sicko. Girls, take it off whenever you want! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-behind-this-bizarre-custom-of-nude-calendars/226160.md?page=2)