# What's Cheez Whiz Got Ta Do, Got Ta Do With It? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 22, 2004, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721 "2004-03-22T14:11:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/101 "2004-03-24T23:43:48Z")
Well, now I know what the front of you looks like, since all the pics you took with Miss Moose were from behind! šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/102 "2004-03-24T23:43:52Z")
\ **WOOHOO! ELLEN!!! CONGRATS AND BEST WISHES AND ALL THAT THERE STUFF ON YA!!!** **Kallessa** , dahlin, do dish! Tell us all about it. We canā€™t wait to here. -swampbear (who got drugs for the sinus infection from hell today) ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/103 "2004-03-24T23:47:46Z")
_meekly_ I have a terrible memory, even about fellow MMPers. May I offer you some conciliatory virtual chocolate cake, **Kallessa**? Iā€™ve never actually had grits, being from Canada and all. We only eat seals. And snow. ---
**Author:** ![earthpuppy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8c91f0/32.png) [@earthpuppy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/earthpuppy)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/104 "2004-03-25T01:15:47Z")
Iā€™m saddened to report that my not-so-definite NO to TornaDope is now definite (Iā€™m saddened, too, **rue**.) That weekend is our annual Greek Festival and Iā€™ll be working it ALL WEEKEND. Itā€™s our biggest fundraiser toward the Building Fund for our church. We recently completed our new Byzantine sanctuary and amphitheater, and itā€™s gonna take a lot of moola to pay it off! But itā€™s a great festival and we all have a wonderful time feeding and entertaining everyone. If anyone is near Marietta, GA the weekend of May 14, 15 and 16, let me knowā€¦Iā€™ll meet you at the gate and give you free admission! Opa! ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/105 "2004-03-25T01:38:39Z")
Okay. The really important people have convinced me that I was missed, and so the others (and you know who you are) can ride on their (the important peopleā€™s) coat tails and read about my exciting week (if they (the not important people) can figure out how to ride and read at the same time). I had to go to Medford for an arbitration. Woohoo! Please, contain your enthusiasm until all the thrills are revealed. The arbitration went wellā€“the arbitrator carefully read the contract language during the first witnessā€™s testimony and then looked bored for the rest of the hearing. Because I was arguing that the contract language was self evident, I take his boredom as a sign of victory. It gets better. We finished early. Iā€™m in the southern part of the State, halfway to the part of Northern California populated by my various friends and relations. Not only do I take the rest of the week off, I get an extra day (with pay and without taking vacation time) to spend with them. Plus, my mileage reimbursement is enough to pay for my whole trip (even with $2.25 a gallon gas in Eureka) even though I only put down the miles between Medford and work. Excited yet? While I am visiting my childhood home, I turn my Mom into an unrepentant gambling maniac. We went to the casinos twice, and would have gone a third time except we stayed in our pajamas until 3:00 and then decided to go to Costco instead. I convinced Mom that it was much smarter to play at least two coins at once, then she found the dime slots and she was off and running. And winning (although, at the dime or two a pop, she didnā€™t win much at a time). And she talks to everyoneā€“and makes friends! She got the attendent to bring her over a little footstool and when the guy next to her won big on a machine she had been playing earlier, he offered to give her 25 bucks (she didnā€™t take it) and the valet went over and got my car even though I hadnā€™t had the valets park it (sheā€™d talked with him while waiting for me when I parked the car before we went in). If I hear that the free shuttle bus is making a special stop in front of her house, I wonā€™t be surprised! She not a big spender, mind you, sheā€™s playing the dime slots, but she still manages to get the high roller treatment. I, on the other hand, lost 40 bucks at blackjack and had my drink forgotten by the server. Still, it was Momā€™s money and empty calories, so I canā€™t complain. Well, I can, and in fact just did, but Bobā€™s your uncle. Iā€™m Mandyā€™s aunt and we hung out at the mall for a while, which she found much more exciting than I did, except that it maintains my position as the ā€œcoolā€ aunt and thatā€™s pretty thrilling. Plus, she hugged me in public, so it was indeed a red letter day. Even more excitement follows. There wasnā€™t much traffic so I got to drive my spiffy little car too fast around sharp corners on a narrow, winding road. Fun stuff and if you had been in the car, it would have been very exciting (except, if you were in the car, I wouldnā€™t have driven so fast because I take better care of my passengers than that). Still with me? Hold on tight, here comes the best part. When I got home, all four of my new bras had arrivedā€“even the ones that were out of stock and not expected until April! And they are my favorite ones, so Iā€™m glad I donā€™t have to wait for them. I canā€™t imagine anything that would top that news, so you can all let out those collective oohs and ahs that youā€™ve been holding back. I now return you to the regularly scheduled MMP. ---
**Author:** ![lightingtool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/57b2e6/32.png) [@lightingtool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lightingtool)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/106 "2004-03-25T01:56:15Z")
You know, I actually do have an uncle named Bob. So Bob is, in fact, my uncle. Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![deb2world](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@deb2world](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deb2world)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/107 "2004-03-25T02:06:29Z")
**lightingtool** no you canā€™t, cause I HAVE an Uncle Bob. There canā€™t be that many Bobs in the world, right. Right? ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/108 "2004-03-25T02:44:07Z")
Hmmm, from SPAM, Velveeta, other icky foods and shoes, to bras, Uncle Bob (I donā€™t have one) and gambling! We have almost come full circle. However, just to contribute to the new twist, I bought some new bras too. I bought those new Victoriaā€™s Secret bras theyā€™ve been advertising. Very nice and comfy with plenty of good support I might add. I bought three of them at $40.00 a pop! I NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER win when I gamble, so I donā€™t go to the casinos anymore. However, I MIGHT go in May when I have to go to Wisconsin for work trip. Itā€™ll be my birthday, so maybe Iā€™ll have some birthday luck and winā€¦FOR ONCE! Taters Perfectly comfortable in her new bra and still a loser at gambling ---
**Author:** ![deb2world](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@deb2world](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deb2world)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/109 "2004-03-25T02:48:35Z")
I always buy bras in set of more than one since I am really just looking for a good support group. ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/110 "2004-03-25T02:50:40Z")
If I said that I posted in the same [thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=4680080#post4680080) as the [post=4679177]Great One[/post] then could I be one of the important people? (Lower case 'cuz I know Iā€™m not as good as the Important People.) P.S. My uncleā€™s name is Bill. ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/111 "2004-03-25T06:19:54Z")
Hee! Bobā€™s yer uncle, and soā€™s mine. We were also born on the same date, only quite a few years apart. Plus my parents were born on the same date, this time just a couple of years apart. That sounds kinda like a freaky family coincidence until you realize itā€™s not. Very handy for remembering when to give presents though. I also never win when gambling, but thatā€™s because I never play. Why play when you know youā€™re just gonna lose? Smart thinking, that is. Casinos are lovely places for finding outlets where I can buy plenty of very neccessary clothing. Victoriaā€™s Secret and I donā€™t speak, since she refuses to regularily stock bras in my particular dimensions. Which are just one cup size above the most popular size, so really olā€™ Vicky needs to apologize. Have you ever noticed how sometimes you can like the idea of how much you saved on a sale item, almost as much as you like the item itself? Or is that just me? ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/112 "2004-03-25T11:02:22Z")
I have an Uncle Bob, my momā€™s brother, but I think heā€™s disowned us. He didnā€™t come to my parentsā€™ 50th anniversary party or to my dadā€™s funeral. That really hurt my momā€™s feelings, so Iā€™m very angry at him. I have an Uncle-in-law named Bob - actually, there were 2, but one died in January. My FIL is named Bob also. I guess Iā€™m hogging a buncha Bobs, huh? I donā€™t like to gamble, because Iā€™m frugal. When I was deployed to Rota, Spain, and my husband came to visit me, we spent and evening playing nickle slots - we each started out with a roll of nickles and ended up broke with sore arms. On his way back to the states, he overnighted in the Azores and decided to go big time - he played the quarter slots and hit for $25, so he took the entire flight crew to the movies. (They were all military and the base movie was like $1 per) As for my bras, Iā€™m sorry, thatā€™s creeping into TMI territory. I will say that theyā€™re all white cotton and leave it at that. I have nothing else to contribute. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/113 "2004-03-25T13:01:31Z")
If **Ex** checks in and finds out that the MMP has gone from cheeze whiz, spam and hash to talking about bras, his headā€™s gonna explode. šŸ˜ƒ And since weā€™re talkinā€™ about underwear, I bought some new tshirts and boxer shorts last week. Tees are white but the boxers are in a variety of colors. -swampbear (wearing a new tee, boxers and a new short sleeved shirt today) ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/114 "2004-03-25T13:20:26Z")
> [@Ellen Cherry](#): > > **Shibb** my dear you are far too sweet. Yes, I am now married, so to be exact I have TWO rings on my finger, one engagement and one wedding band. > > I would change my name to Ellen Apricot or something, but thatā€™s just way too much trouble to go to, plus everybody would have to remember that it was in fact me, etc., etc. So keep calling me Cherry; itā€™s a lot easier than my Actual New Last Name, which is beautiful but exceedingly French. šŸ†’ > > Iā€™m not sure how I feel to be named in the same post with red flannel hash, but seeing as itā€™s **Ex** I forgive him and retire to bask in the large point size. > > I am proud to say I have yet to indulge in any Doper-inspired culinary creations, though I must say Iā€™d rather eat at Shibbā€™s than any other of yā€™allā€™s. Iā€™d come out preserved and pickled! I will admit, under torture only, however, to consuming canned tamales. Iā€™m still having flashbacks to the grease globules which adhered to the wax paper and ultimately, to my fingers. Yeech. Thank you, **Ellen _Cerise_**. Last night we had filet mignon with a nice mushroom sauce (loaded with baby portabellas, scallions, onions, a little lingham sauce in a nice roux (which is both french and reminds me of a certain MMP progenitor). Coupled with a 1998 Estancia Meritage (80% Cab, 17% Merlot) and some twice baked potatoes. Simple yet satisifying. šŸ™‚ Tonight Iā€™m taking my Moms out to dinner at a Thai restaurant on Indian Rocks Beach so we can watch the sunset. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/115 "2004-03-25T13:58:44Z")
Iā€™m doing a beef roast tonight. Any suggestions, **Shibb**? ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/116 "2004-03-25T13:59:54Z")
Darnit, of COURSE I have to come in 3 pages late on a thread about Spam and Velveeta. I missed all the cool stuff. Now itā€™s all just chatter about bras and filet mignon. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/117 "2004-03-25T14:00:48Z")
Do you mean for wines or how to cook it, **LL Cool Lissla**? ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/118 "2004-03-25T14:12:41Z")
**slortar** , thatā€™s the beauty of the MMP - just take it back to Spam and Velveeta if you want. Not only will **Rue** not mind - I expect heā€™ll add another tic mark to whatever system he uses to track hijacks. Thatā€™s gotta be why he encourages them, right? Itā€™s some sort of quota he has to meet, right? Canā€™t leave him with a hijack deficit, now can we? ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/119 "2004-03-25T14:18:21Z")
Dammit! Somebody better check in with a post about power tools or shotguns or something or Iā€™m going to be really ticked off. Listen and listen good, people. I do _not_ want to read about womenā€™s undergarments and the fitting and relative merits thereof. I want to _see pictures_ (and possibly short videos, bandwidth permitting) of ladies in (and out) of their undergarments. This shouldnā€™t be hard to keep straight. For the record, Bobā€™s my dad, and I canā€™t believe it took **lieu** so long to work a poop joke into a thread about Spam and Cheez Whiz. ---
**Author:** ![Wintermute](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e19b73/32.png) [@Wintermute](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wintermute)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721/120 "2004-03-25T14:49:05Z")
Where in No. Cal, **Kallessa**? I grew up in Lake and Mendocino counties. I donā€™t buy my bras at Victoriaā€™s Secret, one because they donā€™t carry my size, and two, even if they did, I think they are overpriced. I donā€™t have any white bras, because you can see them under white shirts. And I think they are boring. All my bras are black or beige (which is boring, too, but itā€™s close enough to my skin tone that you canā€™t see it under my white blouses.) I donā€™t gamble. (I have boringly few vices, but the ones I have, I do up big.) If I go to Atlantic City, Iā€™ll play the roll of quarters you get on the bus and then wander off. I like to walk on the boardwalk and look at the ocean and the Velveeta-cheesy dollar stores. I had a great-uncle named Bob, although he really wasnā€™t, he was named Ben, but he owned a hardware store (there you go, **Ex** , thatā€™s the best I can do.) named ā€œBobā€™s Hardwareā€ for a long time. His own wife called him Bob. So Bob was my uncle, too. Oh, one more thing; despite growing up in Wine Country, I know very little about wines. However, I believe that with something heavy like roast beef, youā€™ll want a hearty red, like a Burgundy or a Pinot Noir. FWIW. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-cheez-whiz-got-ta-do-got-ta-do-with-it/235721.md?page=7)