# What's Fair? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 29, 2003, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158 "2003-06-29T14:20:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![dgs212](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@dgs212](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dgs212)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/1 "2003-06-29T14:20:43Z")
Long time lurker, first time poster… So. My brother, his new wife, and I are all moving in together into a two-bedroom apartment (I know it’s weird, but in manhattan you take what you can get). They’ll be sharing a bedroom and I’ll have a bedroom. All other things being equal, shared-space-wise, what is the fairest way to split the rent? I pay half and they (together) pay half? We each pay one third? I pay 5/12 and they pay 7/12? What do you think? (some background: I’m going back to school for a post-baccalaureate program to prepare for med school and will be subsisting entirely on private loans. Tuition, room, board, books, transportation, etc. My sister-in-law is in grad school, also subsisting entirely on loans. My brother is working as a graphic designer at an ad agency and pulling in a healthy salary. They share a checking and savings account. Does the fact that my income comes from loans have any bearing?) ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/2 "2003-06-29T14:33:40Z")
> [@](#): > > I pay 5/12 and they pay 7/12? Gets my vote … Julie ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/3 "2003-06-29T14:45:43Z")
Can’t you just make it easier on yourself and you pay 1/3 i.e. 33.333% and they pay 2/3… ---
**Author:** ![county](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ce7236/32.png) [@county](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/county)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/4 "2003-06-29T15:03:28Z")
to each according to his need…from each according to his ability (so the new wife pays nothing) ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/5 "2003-06-29T15:08:10Z")
Why shouldn’t the new wife pay anything? She’s taking up space. LOL ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/6 "2003-06-29T15:08:25Z")
You know, it seems all too prevalent that couples seem to think that, since they are a “single unit” that they pay half. I’ve travelled a bit with some couple friends from time to time. While they would tend to split a food bill on the basis of 2/3 and 1/3, they don’t seem to think this applies to hotels and other such costs for fixed assets. They seem to think that you have one bed and we have one bed means you pay for half and we pay for half. Might want to see if they are one of these kinds before you propose anything different. ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/7 "2003-06-29T15:34:08Z")
Well how’s about … Count the number of rooms, divide the rent by this number so you have a proportional cost for each room. Then they pay _half_ the cost of the bedrooms, and _one third each_ for the remaining rooms? Julie (in a pernickety frame of mind ;)) ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/8 "2003-06-29T15:37:32Z")
“pernickety” ??? What’s w/you and the “p” words today? SWL That is an option, tho. Or you could be like my father who when I was 17 and had graduated HS told me that under no uncertain terms was I to live there unless I paid rent. He had this whole percentage thing worked out w/respect to his mortgage payment (at a ridiculously high interest rate) and what space I’d be using. Oh and I had to pay a percentage of all utilities. AND pay extra to run my own little refgrigerator and if I did wash there, I had to pay the market rate for laundromats. OH and I had a curfew… needlss to say, I moved out and created my own debts thankyewverymuch ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/9 "2003-06-29T15:40:55Z")
> [@](#): > > “pernickety” ??? What’s w/you and the “p” words today? Hi again Eilsel 😉 D’ya know - I always thought “pernickety” was an American word - not so? Well anyway, it means kinda fussy and “nit-picking”. Julie ---
**Author:** ![dgs212](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@dgs212](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dgs212)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/10 "2003-06-29T15:43:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Shrinking Violet \* > \*\*Well how’s about … > > Count the number of rooms, divide the rent by this number so you have a proportional cost for each room. Then they pay _half_ the cost of the bedrooms, and _one third each_ for the remaining rooms? > > Julie (in a pernickety frame of mind ;)) \*\* Should I factor in square footage (seriously…sort of)? ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/11 "2003-06-29T15:48:10Z")
> [@](#): > > Should I factor in square footage (seriously…sort of)? Only if you’re also going to factor in the relevant weights of each occupant. 😉 Julie ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/12 "2003-06-29T15:49:31Z")
I knew what you meant, I was busting your chops. I actually grew up saying “persnickity” _shrug_ dags212 - Sure factor in square footage, et al. However, if you have a good relationship w/them now, you won’t after you do that LOL. Perhaps you should just stick to the simple formula of 2/3 them 1/3 you. Ikeep pushing this formula because it’s mine and I’m always right. SWL (kidding, kidding) ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/13 "2003-06-29T15:53:49Z")
If this were three unrelated people moving in together, would the two who ended up in the same room think they should each only pay 1/4 of the rent? No. You might talk about a small reduction in exchange for the inconvenience of sharing a room but not dropping their shares from 1/3 to 1/4. And here, there is no inconvenience involved in sharing the room. So each roommate should pay 1/3. ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/14 "2003-06-29T15:55:16Z")
YAY! Did I win? (can I have cake as a prize?) ---
**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/15 "2003-06-29T16:03:11Z")
**Eilsel** , I have to ask (well, I guess I don’t really _have_ to, but I really, really want to)…what does SWL mean? I’ve never seen it and I thought I was pretty net savvy. (Of course I also think I’m a tall, willowy blonde, so what the hell do I know) Salem, the vertically challenged redhead ---
**Author:** ![dgs212](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@dgs212](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dgs212)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/16 "2003-06-29T16:03:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eilsel \* > \*\*Perhaps you should just stick to the simple formula of 2/3 them 1/3 you. > \*\* They seem to think this is unfair, as they have to share a bedroom while I get one to myself. They make it sound as if its a chore for a married couple to sleep together (they were only just married a month ago). Well, too bad. You should of thought of that when you were unwrapping your Le Creuset dutch oven and Williams Sonoma mortar & pestle set and your Global ceramic knife sharpener. In all honesty, I agree that they shouldn’t have to pay a third each, just as I shouldn’t have to pay half (especially since they were kind enough to find the palce to begin with and will share all that awesome wedding cookware). 5/12 and 7/12 is a good compromise. Also, they have a couch, a table, chairs, and a bench above and beyond the furniture we both own a set of (a bed, desk, bookcases, end tables, a chair, TV, etc.). On the otherhand, I have gamecube, an N64, and a playstation2, whereas they only have a gamecube, N64, and a Super Nintendo. Clearly, the Playstation2 trumps all. Perhaps they should pay me to live there… ---
**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/17 "2003-06-29T16:06:04Z")
What you need to do **dgs212** is find yourself a little woman, move her in and then you can feel just fine with a fifty/fifty split. Salem, full of helpful hints today ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/18 "2003-06-29T16:08:15Z")
Maybe you should offer to RENT the PS2 for say, only 1/3. Well whatever works. Don’t let the whole thing take over your lives. Just deal with it. …and look for another place in the meantime LOL Salem, SWL means screaming with laughter 🙂 I also am delusional, I think I’m a thin, pretty brunette when I’m really a short squatty overweight brunette w/a Mexican Indian background. LOL ---
**Author:** ![dgs212](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@dgs212](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dgs212)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/19 "2003-06-29T16:16:28Z")
Thanks for all the replies. I think I’m just going to stick with the 5/12 solution (ooh…“5/12 Solution.” good band name). I don’t want to be a jerk about it, and since I’m transferring the costs of all this to myself at a later date through the magic of loans, I’ll be able to afford the extra $160 a month it’s going to cost me when those big Doctor checks start rolling in. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2003, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158/20 "2003-06-29T16:25:29Z")
Look at it like this, if you pay half, you’ll have more leverage over things rules and such. For hotels n’ social adventures, every person should pay an equal share (ex. 1/3 for 3 people). Marriage means tax breaks, but being cheap all around. But because this is kinda their apartment, and you are their guest AND they’re providing furniture, beds, dishes, tv’s, (yeah, you got the PS/2, but really, who uses that crap?), you should pay half. Now, if this isn’t their apartment and it’s a joint venture for everybody to be roommates, 1/3 is how it should be. Just because you are a couple doesn’t mean you get freebies. Print out this thread and hand it to them. 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-fair/185158.md?page=2)