# What's in your kitchen "junk drawer"?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-in-your-kitchen-junk-drawer/166858>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [April 6, 2003, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-in-your-kitchen-junk-drawer/166858 "2003-04-06T13:07:15Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 2\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![dman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f0a364/32.png) [@dman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dman)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-in-your-kitchen-junk-drawer/166858/23 "2003-04-07T12:59:56Z")

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A few years back I saw a song performed by an Australian called Jimeoin as part of a Buskers Festival …  
Ah, I love the internet - here it is  
[http://www.lyricsfreak.com/j/jimeoin/59963.htm](http://www.lyricsfreak.com/j/jimeoin/59963.htm)  
(beware evil pop-up)

Strummed in an extremely laconic and conversational tone:

> [@](#):
>
> In my kitchen there’s a draw at the top  
> 'Sgot cutlery: knives, forks, spoons the lot  
> Second draw down’s got big knives and an egg whip  
> Things that should go in the first draw - but they just don’t fit  
> But the third draw down  
> From the top  
> Is just full of shit
> 
> Aha… and there’s tons of it…
> 
> Elastic bands and tally-hos that don’t stick  
> Dried up glue, false teeth, something stolen from a hotel  
> Things that are broken that you know you’ll never fix  
> But you put them in the third draw,  
> ‘cause you just don’t got the heart to throw them away,  
> It’s the third draw down  
> From the top  
> An’ it’s full of shit
> 
> Bum-bup-a-bum,  
> Bum-bup-a-bum-bum-bum,  
> Bum-bum,
> 
> Blu-tac and cellotape that’s been hit by a truck  
> One chopstick, an ashtray from Canada  
> Paid bills and envelopes  
> Things that you think’ll come in handy - but they just never do  
> It’s the third draw down  
> From the top  
> An’ it’s full of shit
> 
> Bup-a-bum-bum-bum,
> 
> In the third draw,  
> It’s full of shit…  
> And the fourth draw down  
> (that’s the one below the third)  
> It’s got plastic bags in it
> 
> And that’s it.

;j  
The last two lines are my fave - had the entire crowd crack up with sympathy/empathy (some word that means you know **exactly** what that’s like). I think there may have been more verses depending on his mood.  
Then I put my mum onto it - her whole house is the ‘the third drawer down from the top’ - it’s now a family expression.

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**Author:** ![dwc1970](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a183cd/32.png) [@dwc1970](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwc1970)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-in-your-kitchen-junk-drawer/166858/24 "2003-04-07T14:06:35Z")

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Shitload of rubber bands, all colors and sizes  
Pens, some of which no longer write  
Markers, some of which are dried out and thus no longer write  
Pencils of varying length from nearly new to little stubs. Some either have no eraser left, or the eraser is hard and too worn to be of any use  
Jar of marbles  
Matchbooks (I don’t smoke or have any other reason to light matches in my house)  
Screwdrivers  
Screws  
Nails (some are bent and rusty and had been pulled out of the wall in the last place I lived)  
Those twist ties that are used on the cords with new electronic items  
A collection of the plastic things that hold a bread bag closed  
Popsicle sticks  
A few receipts and ticket stubs  
Cassette tape (recorded contents not determined as of this writing)  
And several other things (though since I am at work right now I can’t check to see what’s all in there.)  
Also, here’s a semi-related [Onion](http://www.theonion.com/onion3902/new_economy.html) article.

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