Dry Counties in Tenn was a culture shock to me when I moved to Bradley County in the mid 80’s. I thought Dry counties turned “wet” when The Andy Griffith Show was canceled.
Rural Tennessee is insanely boring.
Large/small cities are you best choice.
I have a great deal of experience living in large cities and small towns in the Southern and Midwestern US.
Unless you are already a Baptist or don’t mind becoming a Baptist do not do it. Large cities in the US south can be OK. Nashville, Memphis, or Atlanta for example smaller places-sorry but do you like making friends at church?
Do not do it.
I have some friends from rural Tennessee and have visited a few times. You will not fit in. As an urbanite “fag” you will be completely ostracized and alienated from everyone.
You will have a very hard and lonely life.
Tennessee is dry?
Forget it.
Most of Tennessee is NOT dry; Maury County in particular is not.
Most of my friends are not Baptist. Many do not attend church anywhere. And yet somehow we all manage to get along. No one has tried to convert me to their religion, nor have I tried to convert them to mine.
My experience (from actually living here) is that people live and let live for the most part. Are you going to run into the sterotypical Bible-thumping Southerner who is convinced you’re going to Hell? Yeah, probably. But that type of person definitely isn’t in the majority and they probably think I’m going to Hell for one reason or another too. And frankly, you can find that backwards mentality in every state-we don’t own the monopoly on that.
You said you were going to come down for a visit, which I think is a great idea. My family visited several times before actually making the move (when I was a kid). I hope you have time to hit several spots in Middle Tennessee. If you find you don’t like rural life, come spend some time in Columbia or Spring Hill. If those towns are too small, visit Franklin and Nashville.
Some people are happier in cities; some people like and even prefer the slower life in the sticks. That’s a basic dichotomy no matter what part of the country or even the world you are talking about. What one person finds “boring” another may find tranquil and expansive. What the OP needs to think about, in part, is if he can make a transition from one to the other. Maybe yes, maybe no, but that’s a personal matter, not one any of us can tell him.
As for TN being dry … as Jelly Roll said, no, of course not. Some COUNTIES are, but there are only a few. As with other places, liquor laws are an odd patchwork with strange restrictions based on the power of the liquor wholesaler lobby. For example, wine can only be sold in liquor stores, not in grocery stores. This is true of New York City, too, so there ya go.
I live in a blue county in a red state, and even I get weary of the conservative mugwumps. Still, again as JR said, most people are live-and-let-live on a personal basis. (Some of the legislators could take a lesson there, but hey … it will be good to have more blue voters in the area! heh.)
Like a lot of things, when moving to an area that is not like where you are from, whether you like it or not depends a lot on your attitude going in. I’ve seen people come here with a positive attitude and fall in love with the place, and I’ve seen people who come in convinced we’re all Daisy Maes and Boss Hoggs and see only those things that reinforce those views. The latter are miserable – they also bemoan the fact that they can’t get “real NY style pizza” or “real sushi” or whatever, and say that Southern food literally scares them. (No joke, I’ve seen this comment on Chowhound.) So, you can choose to embrace what’s different, or you can wallow in homesickness no matter where you go.
To the naysayers: thank you, I need to hear that. This plan may be totally insane; that’s why the next logical step is a leisurely visit.
I know Nashville quite well, by the way. I could certainly live there with ease. Perhaps the tiny town will NOT work at all. That leaves me wondering mostly about Columbia, which is equally convenient to N’ville and the tiny town - is it large and semi-urban enough for me to fit in a little? Realize, of course, that I don’t really fit in ANYWHERE, so I’m not expecting a bed of roses, just hoping to avoid being actively shunned or harassed. As a best-case scenario, I’m thinking of Oliver and Lisa in Green Acres, who remained forever outsiders but got along anyway. I will not, however, be acquiring a pig.
One of my childhood friends is gay and has remained in rural West Tennessee in a town of 2,000. It’s probably different when you grow up there and are much loved as a kid.
You would have a better chance of finding friends and acceptance in Columbia – and more things to do, certainly.
Tennessee has 95 counties and most of them are not dry. If you live in a dry county, just drive a few miles to the next county to buy what you want.
There are many other churches besides the Baptist church in Tennessee. The United Methodist Publishing House is located in Middle Tennessee as are many of its churches. There is a different kind of Presbyterian Church on every corner. The Cumberland Presbyterian Church was founded 200 years ago in Middle Tennessee in what is now Montgomery Bell State Park. There are Episcopal Churches, Roman Catholic, Luthern and other mainstream churches. Some of these have become more tolerant of homosexuality. Even a Baptist Church near where I live has a lesbian minister. There are also more fundamental churches available. It is true that a lot of social life is through the church.
Episcopal church choirs give the best parties.
Paul McCartney chose a small town in rural Middle Tennessee – Fairview – to do some writing for a few months. Peter Jenkins, the man who wrote A Walk Across America chose to settle in Middle Tennessee. The people from The Farm that I described weren’t just born there. Rugby, Tennessee is a Victorian village that was founded by British author Thomas Hughes so that the “second sons” of British aristocracy – those who didn’t inherit the titles – would have a special place to call their own. (They built the tennis courts before they built a place to sleep.) There are mighty fine vinyards down the road a bit.
If you are bored in rural Tennessee, you haven’t been working on your novel or learning to play another instrument.
In Columbia, I would probably go to the Episcopal church nearest me. And I know all about those choir parties. There was this certain baritone…
I’m a musician, thinking about starting to write … rural or semi-rural life may suit. I’m not trying to reproduce my current existence in this new locale. Not looking for a big social circle, just hoping to be able to do my thing and not be too bothered by the neighbors, if any. “Nothing to do” in a small town or countryside is a non-issue for me, so long as I can drive into the big city once in a while, and not get beat up at the corner store back home.
As a middle-aged, straight, single male in Tennessee with no children, I’m really getting a kick out of some of these replies. 
I’m a Northerner, born and raised. I find Tennessee way too freakin’ hot and humid for too many months. Thank Og for central air. Nashville seems fairly nice. It reminds me of Pittsburgh - a river(one is enough), and a little town feel with big town entertainment & conveniences. Pittsburgh, with more tornado warnings. Don’t know what’s up with all the tornado warnings, but they seem common.
If you want to see live entertainment, you’re going to need to go to Nashville, or enjoy whatever local bands/theater are in your area. National acts won’t be visiting your backwater town. Rural life in TN is much like rural life anywhere, I suppose. Entertain yourself, enjoy the simple things, or get used to going into the ‘big city’. Expect a low cost of living relative to many big cities, which is good, because many jobs will pay you with that in mind.
A sense of humor helps – and I see that you have one. Sounds like Columbia may be just right for you. Be careful not to buy or rent a place too close to the Duck River. It floods. Keep that in mind. Columbia can be classy for a small town and it won’t take you too long to get into Nashville.
A copy of The Nashville Scene will tell you everything that is going on all over town – including live music. It’s not all country music. Bits and pieces of local theater. Our local arts cinema is the Belcourt Theater. When you make your move, let me know and I will send you a link.
I think you are going to do just fine.