# Whats the deal with girls? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 30, 2004, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771 "2004-01-30T16:26:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![BioHazard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3bc359/32.png) [@BioHazard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BioHazard)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/1 "2004-01-30T16:26:17Z")
This always happens to me any time I meet a girl. We get to talking, everythings going great, I get her number, we dance, she seems totally into me until she asks what my job is. I say “I’m a computer programmer” and she says “oh. Well nice to meet you I have to go.” Whats the deal? Why does my job matter so much? This is even more confusing because when I met my last GF I said “I don’t have a job, I live in my truck, and I have no money.” We hooked up, I got a job and a place and she broke up with me. Whats the deal? ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/2 "2004-01-30T16:32:36Z")
That is odd, isn’t it? I have no idea. ---
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/3 "2004-01-30T16:32:52Z")
No idea. Computer programmers = sexy. It’s all about the brains. 🙂 Stop dating stupid women and I’m sure the problem will resolve itself. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/4 "2004-01-30T16:42:01Z")
dating Computer programmers… kinda like living in Alaska: The odds are good but the goods are odd. 🙂 Some girls think geeks are groovy… then again some think "'I’m going to want to go out dancing and he’s going to say “not tonight honey, my Everquest Guild has a meeting. I might be done in one, or three, or twelve hours.” Not to say this describes you. ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9dc877/32.png) [@Mr\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/5 "2004-01-30T16:42:03Z")
Wow I dunno, I’d be all over you. It’s better to get rid of the shallow ones before it goes anywhere anyway but that would suck if this is a common thing. ---
**Author:** ![KarmaComa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e36b37/32.png) [@KarmaComa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarmaComa)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/6 "2004-01-30T16:43:00Z")
Maybe they think that the fact that you’re a computer programmer means you’re down a long road towards a stale, career-driven life? ---
**Author:** ![Shaggarito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dec6dc/32.png) [@Shaggarito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shaggarito)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/7 "2004-01-30T16:53:27Z")
Dude, we’re never going to understand girls. I don’t even think they understand themselves. I am interested in a answer from some ladies though. How important are these things to you? Type of job? Where we live? A Computer Programmer seems like a pretty impressive job to me. Maybe they think that Computer Programmer is commonly associated with Nerds. Nerds=unexciting. So, it scares them off? Who knows? Shouldn’t this be in IMHO? -Shaggarito (Proud of his first “You’re in the wrong forum comment”.) ---
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/8 "2004-01-30T17:00:10Z")
Oh, hey, maybe Hello\_Again has put a finger on why I have trouble understanding what the heck is wrong with these girls BioHazard’s been dating… I play EverQuest, and prefer it to dancing. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![av8rmike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/edb3f5/32.png) [@av8rmike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/av8rmike)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/9 "2004-01-30T17:00:42Z")
I’d consider it an effective screening technique, this coming from a mech. engineer. I’ve gotten the brush-off too, and I realized I was better off without the company of someone who was so judgmental. > [@](#): > > We hooked up, I got a job and a place and she broke up with me. Sounds like you got the better end of the deal to me. On the other hand, if this is all you’re after, come up with a better cover story. Just don’t be hurt if it backfires too. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/10 "2004-01-30T17:20:27Z")
For what industry do you program computers? Try, “I work in the aerospace / engineering / whatever industry” instead. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/11 "2004-01-30T17:33:18Z")
Or try, “Software Developer”, or “Software Designer”. It kind of strips the “nerd” from the programming title. Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![BioHazard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3bc359/32.png) [@BioHazard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BioHazard)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/12 "2004-01-30T17:37:45Z")
> [@Khiadra](#): > > Oh, hey, maybe Hello\_Again has put a finger on why I have trouble understanding what the heck is wrong with these girls BioHazard’s been dating… > > I play EverQuest, and prefer it to dancing. 😉 I used to play eq but I decided that sleep and work is more important… What server do you play on? ---
**Author:** ![Cosmopolitan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/94ad74/32.png) [@Cosmopolitan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cosmopolitan)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/13 "2004-01-30T17:37:52Z")
> [@Shaggarito](#): > > Dude, we’re never going to understand girls. I don’t even think they understand themselves. > > I am interested in a answer from some ladies though. > How important are these things to you? Type of job? Where we live? Hm. We sometimes don’t understand ourselves, but that’s mostly during that time of the month when you flee. As for your question: IMHO, I think that the most important thing is to _have_ a job, or to be going to university/trade school/etc., or to do something else that is productive & somewhat forward-thinking. Where a guy lives/what he drives/etc. isn’t as important to me as whether he has life goals & is working to achieve them. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/14 "2004-01-30T17:38:26Z")
Maybe they think you’re too “techhy”. Like you don’t have a side that appreciates the arts and such. Generally I think it’s bad form to ask someone what they do right up front. It’s better to start with, “So what are your interests?” That way, you get the whole picture. ``` -- Kalhoun (married to a warehouse worker) ``` ---
**Author:** ![BioHazard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3bc359/32.png) [@BioHazard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BioHazard)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/15 "2004-01-30T17:45:03Z")
> [@qts](#): > > For what industry do you program computers? Try, “I work in the aerospace / engineering / whatever industry” instead. Oh yah! Im working on some very exciting software right now! I get to take databases for business software, write dummy proof gui’s around them and get them to stay synced remotely! Hey! Where are you going? Come back! Please! I’m not done telling you about it yet! ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/16 "2004-01-30T17:49:50Z")
> [@Shaggarito](#): > > Dude, we’re never going to understand girls. I don’t even think they understand themselves. > > I am interested in a answer from some ladies though. > How important are these things to you? Type of job? Where we live? > > A Computer Programmer seems like a pretty impressive job to me. > Maybe they think that Computer Programmer is commonly associated with Nerds. > Nerds=unexciting. So, it scares them off? Who knows? > -Shaggarito > (Proud of his first “You’re in the wrong forum comment”.) Well, I _don’t_ understand myself, so you’re right about that. For your questions, I can’t say I care _what_ type of job a guy has, as long as he’s got all his teeth and maybe a smattering of intelligence. 🙂 Of course, there are certain jobs that would probably not score high on my list. “Oh, I’m the guy who drains the blood from veal,” is probably something I should put on my list of turnoffs. But “I’m a computer programmer” definitely wouldn’t send me screaming. It implies that you’re smart, maybe a little geeky, and I’ve yet to meet a computer programmer with an atrocious sense of humor. The fact that most programmers make at least decent money is another plus. And nerds don’t scare me off. I love nerds. Nerds, geeks, dorks, all of them. It’s been my experience that an adorable little dork is more attentive than a big manly-man, usually sweeter, and always more interesting to talk to. ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/17 "2004-01-30T18:04:22Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > And nerds don’t scare me off. I love nerds. Nerds, geeks, dorks, all of them. It’s been my experience that an adorable little dork is more attentive than a big manly-man, usually sweeter, and always more interesting to talk to. For the love of god, fellow-male-dopers, why as no one hit on this woman yet? I mean, I can’t carry the burden all by myself… ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/18 "2004-01-30T18:11:46Z")
I don’t think I’ll tell my brother about this thread. He’s in programming school right now. I think you need to start looking elsewhere for dates. Lots of us female-type people like geeks. Every guy I’ve ever been interested in was geeky. I consider “geeky” a compliment, so if I call you that, it’s a term of endearment. 'Scuse me, I gotta go watch B5 now. I never said I wasn’t a geek too…😃 ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/19 "2004-01-30T18:34:43Z")
A paraphrased Corner Gas moment: > [@](#): > > Lacy (waitress): So, what’s your story? Tell me, what do you do? > Marvin Gray: Oh, just government work, nothing special… > Lacey: Oh, come on, tell me! Who do you work for? > MG: Canada Customs and Revenue Agency > Lacey: Oh…that’s…interesting…I really should get back to work… > (Lacey leaves) > MG(shaking his head): Every time…could you at least take my order?? Sorry, I just had to share! I love this new TV show! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2004, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771/20 "2004-01-30T18:41:59Z")
My ex-roommate is a female CS major who refuses to have anything to do with male CS majors. It’s… weird. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-deal-with-girls/226771.md?page=2)