# What's the dumbest question you've ever been asked? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 3, 2017, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054 "2017-06-03T23:16:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2017, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/161 "2017-06-06T21:43:10Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > Anyway, so, yeah - what was the answer? My response was, “How could you ask a question like that and then look at yourself in the mirror?” ---
**Author:** ![usedtobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ec9cab/32.png) [@usedtobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usedtobe)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2017, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/162 "2017-06-06T22:15:49Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > That’s not what I’m wondering. > > CONTEXT IS VITAL IN THIS SITUATION. > > Why did the doctor ask you that question? > What kind of doctor, GP? Surgeon? Psychiatrist? > Were you in pain and said you hurt so bad you wanted to kill yourself? > Did you make some kind of mistake and say “I could kill myself?” > Why did you consider this a dumb question? IT’S NOT OBVIOUS. MD assigned by Hospital - I was admitted with a pulse of 37.1. I have a life-long resolution that I will not linger or suffer - I will die by my own hand if necessary. The “life-long” and “if necessary” keep getting missed - I was held on a “Psych Hold” because I could imagine checking myself out. After I sent the (City) police home, they decided that maybe the cops knew something they had missed. Duh. The young MD probably had never had a patient who actually had thought about suicide, hence the silly question. Exactly HOW did she think I would respond? ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2017, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/163 "2017-06-06T22:16:01Z")
Dumbest question asked by me to my wife who was an art history major: “So who painted Whistler’s Mother?” Let it be known that I knew the painting was a portrait of the artists mother, I just brain farted the fact that his name was in the title. ---
**Author:** ![D.E.S.K.Top668](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@D.E.S.K.Top668](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D.E.S.K.Top668)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2017, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/164 "2017-06-06T22:36:55Z")
“So, you’re not going to do it?” CONTEXT: I was asked to take 2.4 Million dollars’ worth of electronics to a customer that was 94 miles away. As I often made emergency deliveries, I was told that our insurance covered $500,000 in losses in personal vehicles. As my boss was unavailable, I said no and explained why. The guy who asked suggested a U-Haul, which I pointed out only covers $25,000. ---
**Author:** ![DrForrester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8edcca/32.png) [@DrForrester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrForrester)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/165 "2017-06-07T02:04:48Z")
I once had a maintenance man come into my lab, and stare, mouth open, for a while and then say, very slowly, “Wow… You’ve got a lot of chemicals in here. Aren’t you afraid of them?” I just smiled and replied that I also had a lot of electricity in the lab, but I don’t go running around licking the light sockets. It’s all about knowing the rules & following them. Life’s perils surround us constantly, but so do life’s joys. It’s just perspective. * * * The people with whom I work are all, supposedly, “science people”. But the other day, I had an exchange with one of them that made me wonder. He related something astonishingly stupid that a certain politician had done & I said, “That guy is so stupid that he probably doesn’t know that days get shorter in the Summer.” … and then I had to spend the next five minutes lecturing the room about how Summer starts on the longest day of the year, the Summer Solstice. And, how, by definition, all of the other days of Summer are shorter than the preceding one until, ultimately, we reach the Winter Solstice, at which point we start the season of Winter and the days start getting longer. Somehow, I thought this sort of thing was usually covered in high school. Doesn’t anyone take “Earth Science” these days? Made me feel like an old man yelling about the importance of cursive writing. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/166 "2017-06-07T03:50:28Z")
> [@DrForrester](#): > > … and then I had to spend the next five minutes lecturing the room about how Summer starts on the longest day of the year, the Summer Solstice. You’ll get plenty of argument about that. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/167 "2017-06-07T04:06:00Z")
> [@DrForrester](#): > > …I said, “That guy is so stupid that he probably doesn’t know that days get shorter in the Summer.”… The common sense interpretation of that statement is that you wrongly think days are shorter when summer comes around, relative to the length of days in winter. But I think perhaps you know that. That doesn’t make other people dumb. It just makes you worthy of a handectomy. > **[Words that End in GRY](https://xkcd.com/169/)** > > The fifth panel also applies to postmodernists. ---
**Author:** ![DrForrester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8edcca/32.png) [@DrForrester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrForrester)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/168 "2017-06-07T10:48:59Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > But I think perhaps you know that. That doesn’t make other people dumb. It just makes you worthy of a handectomy. > > [xkcd: Words that End in GRY](https://xkcd.com/169/) I wasn’t trying to be haughty or smug. But, I can be a little disconnected. It’s not on purpose. I think you think I was trying to trick someone. But, that would’ve defeated the whole point of my statement. This is why I normally just keep my mouth shut. ---
**Author:** ![CookingWithGas](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cookingwithgas/32/485_2.png) [@CookingWithGas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CookingWithGas)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/169 "2017-06-07T12:39:18Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I understand that some of you don’t understand why a question like “Do you think any of the guys in R.E.M. have ever had sex outside of marriage” is a stupid question. 😕 It is when it’s asked by a guy in his late 20s to try and get his girlfriend, who was also her in her late 20s, into bed. We weren’t adolescents at the time. :rolleyes: Maybe you don’t see why we don’t understand. To me, that question is just as sensible as saying, “Do think think any of the guys on the Boston Red Sox are vegan?” I don’t know what asking about the fidelity of REM members is a dumb question, or following up to your most recent post, what it has to do with getting a woman into bed. I don’t know why this question would even come up about REM in particular, or why the age of the participants gives relevance. OK let me make up a fake context. Guy has a girlfriend, and she is an absolutely maniacal fan of REM. Bought every recording, travels the country to see every concert. She worships them. They can do no wrong. So the boyfriend figures if he can project behavior onto REM that she might otherwise find taboo, he might be able to change her worldview. By “outside marriage” let’s assume you mean “premarital” rather than “extramarital.” So he asks the question to get her thinking that, yeah, these REM guys probably did that! So I guess it’s OK if I bonk my boyfriend. But there is no context. So we have no idea if that’s what happened. Or if you just don’t give a shit about REM. And at first I really wanted to know but this is getting to be too much work. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/170 "2017-06-07T12:43:54Z")
> [@CookingWithGas](#): > > But there is no context. So we have no idea if that’s what happened. Or if you just don’t give a shit about REM. I think what you wrote is the interpretation the post was going for. **Nearwildheaven** stated she’s a huge REM fan (and that her username is her favorite REM song.) ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/171 "2017-06-07T12:49:17Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > The common sense interpretation of that statement is that you wrongly think days are shorter when summer comes around, relative to the length of days in winter. > > But I think perhaps you know that. That doesn’t make other people dumb. It just makes you worthy of a handectomy. > > [xkcd: Words that End in GRY](https://xkcd.com/169/) Plus, given that it’s only true _under a certain, not entirely agreed-upon definition of summer_, then it’s fair game to retort that under a different definition of _day_, the days are the same length throughout the year. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/172 "2017-06-07T13:14:05Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > I don’t understand your question in this context? How does the orientation of the mother with an unwanted pregnancy change the choices they are presenting? He stated that “Gay parenting is child abuse.” So I asked him “What if a lesbian gets pregnant?” His only logical answer to that question, given he was anti-abortion and thought gay parenting was child abuse,should have been “She should be forced to have the baby and FORCED to give it up to a nice straight, married couple.” Which would have been an absolutely hideous answer, and showed his true colors. ---
**Author:** ![Modesty\_Blaise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/77aa72/32.png) [@Modesty\_Blaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Modesty_Blaise)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/173 "2017-06-07T13:34:35Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > Good grief, all we have is this snippet of conversation: > > I’ve been in parts of the U.S. where I was the first person people had ever _met_ who openly espoused atheism. And this kind of question is certainly a common first response. You want to just condemn the fact that someone finds your worldview difficult to understand, given their cultural background, as just “stupid” or “calling you a liar”? > > Sure, if you have patiently explained your beliefs, and someone still keeps on with patronizing nonsense like “I don’t think you’re really an atheist, you’re just angry at God”, then you’d have a valid point. The brainwashed religious _can_ be plenty stupid. But without that kind of context, I really don’t think this merits the “dumbest question you’ve ever been asked” tag. Oh ffs - Somehow the implication is that I’m being a jerk for not understanding where a believer is coming from when they ask a stupid question, yet they get a pass for not understanding where the non-believer is coming from? Frankly, this attitude is typical - theists are catered to in every aspect of our culture. Atheists are expected to go along with, understand and cater to believers. Why are they not expected to have some basic understanding of atheists? “Aren’t you afraid of going to hell?” is a stupid question. Their ignorance of atheists is part of the stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/174 "2017-06-07T13:38:37Z")
It may not be the dumbest, but even excluding such gems as “but, but, but, how are we going to get a girl into Production?” (through the same door as everybody else, my hips aren’t _that_ wide) it certainly deserved at least one whole layer of cake. At the end of an interview, an agent asked me “do you speak English?” Once I’d recovered from the stun, I asked “what have we been speaking for the last half hour?” ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/175 "2017-06-07T13:41:14Z")
I always point out to people who say “I know there’s a God” that they believe there’s a god." People who confused beliefs with facts are extremely dangerous. I know there is gravity, and I can’t jump off a 10 story building without dire consequences. But some people tel me they “know” God will save them in those circumstances. I point out they can believe it (making they sound like an idiot) but they only way to know it is to test it. Which makes them back off. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/176 "2017-06-07T13:55:13Z")
> [@originaljbw](#): > > “Does your vegetarian lasagna contain any beef/pork/whatever meat?” > > If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that question I would be able to build the Zoolander school kids who can’t read good and lack reading comprehension. In Dos Hermanas (Seville), I once ordered a spinach lasagna which turned out to have spinach, pasta layers, and more bacon than either of the other two. It was labeled as “vegetarian” on the printed menu. In Valladolid, a city famous for its Holy Week displays, and on Passion Friday (when in theory you’re supposed to fast and abstain from meat), I ordered a zucchini lasagne which turned out to be zucchini in between layers of bacon, no pasta in sight. Some people have definitions of what constitutes a lasagna which makes me want to make them eat a brick lasagna. Pasta layers optional. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/177 "2017-06-07T13:59:27Z")
10th grade. I’d just moved to Florida from the UK. “What language do you guys speak in England?” ---
**Author:** ![Drummond\_Bays](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8edcca/32.png) [@Drummond\_Bays](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drummond_Bays)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/178 "2017-06-07T16:34:08Z")
There was an old battleaxe of a woman who lived across from my parents, went by the nickname ‘DoDo.’ Thicker than a bootheel and twice as dense… Anyway, a Greek family with a dog moved in across the street, and naturally, they spoke to the dog in Greek. With a stupid smile she pipes up: ‘How is the dog going to understand them if they’re speaking another language?!?!?!’ …‘DoDo,’ indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/179 "2017-06-07T17:11:51Z")
It was late November. I asked a cashier where the snow shovels were. He said, “Through those doors.” I thanked him and was headed over there when he asked, “Wait–do you want to buy them _now?_” Apparently he hadn’t gotten them out of storage yet, and his answer meant where they would be, once he finally got around to doing it. ---
**Author:** ![Anxious\_Squirrel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/anxious_squirrel/32/1083_2.png) [@Anxious\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anxious_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2017, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054/180 "2017-06-07T17:23:32Z")
Haha! My BFF is from Cornwall, and when we first met online and were chatting through Skype, I blithely asked her if Cornwall was a real place that still existed. 😃 😃 😃 Of course, she fought my ignorance straightaway! In general stupid seems to mean, “that person doesn’t know something that I know, something that seems obvious to me.” But we all go through lives in our own unique bubbles and our brains tend to only register the stuff that feels most pertinent to us. Plus, as humans, it’s impossible for us to put ourselves in the head of someone who doesn’t know something that we now know. And calling other people stupid makes us feel better about ourselves. I think it might even be a learned, automatic reaction from when we were kids and got laughed at all the time. It builds a sensitivity and makes us lash out whenever we have the opportunity to make someone else feel smaller than us, and make ourselves feel smarter. Or maybe that’s only me! I got laughed at all the time and called stupid every day by my mom. I’m still not sure if I was a particularly stupid child (I was special needs) or she just had an anger management problem brought on by her own abusive childhood. ‘Is stupid an actual measurement or is it simply an emotional response’, is something I sometimes wonder. Ignorant feels like it’s a real thing, as is not knowing things, but labeling other people as stupid, is probably more like a human ego thing. I know I feel that reaction often, but I’m not feeling it right now, so can’t remember any examples, other than things I’ve said or thought myself. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-question-youve-ever-been-asked/788054.md?page=10)