# What's the dumbest thing you've seen on a product? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 21, 2003, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907 "2003-01-21T00:55:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![BabaBooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@BabaBooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BabaBooey)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/1 "2003-01-21T00:55:39Z")
I was at Wally World yesterday and saw a 3 liter of Sprite. On top of the label in big bold letters it said “50% MORE THAN A 2 LITER!!” WOW! I mean is this really necessary? It’s not like you’re getting 50% more for the same price, just 50% more. ---
**Author:** ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/2 "2003-01-21T01:27:01Z")
“A quiescently frozen desert” What did you do, sneak up on it while it was sleeping and freeze it? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/3 "2003-01-21T02:12:38Z")
I recently bought some marbles for a friend. You know marbles. Those little pretty glass spheres that you shoot and stuff. Any way they were in a CLEAR plastic jar with a lable stating the name of the product “CLASSIC MARBLES”. But the fine print read and I kidd you not > [@](#): > > Warning! This product contains marbles. Really! Is thats what in there? ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/4 "2003-01-21T02:17:38Z")
Just got a big screen t.v. The user manual warns me not to hook it up “in or near water.” ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/5 "2003-01-21T02:44:21Z")
A candle I just purchased says “WARNING: To extinguish the candle, blow out the flame. Always keep candle away from flamable materials.” ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/6 "2003-01-21T03:02:25Z")
Rectal suppositories: “Not for use in the eye” ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/7 "2003-01-21T03:35:05Z")
On a can of tomatoes: Open Can with Can Opener. I don’t even want to imagine how they thought I might open it if I had not been properly instructed.😕 ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/8 "2003-01-21T03:51:26Z")
On a four-litre jug of water I just bought: “_Natural_ spring water”. Well, _duh_. ---
**Author:** ![Harald\_Bluetooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/9fc29f/32.png) [@Harald\_Bluetooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harald_Bluetooth)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/9 "2003-01-21T05:11:47Z")
1. I bought an insulated travel mug, which as you might suspect is sold empty. It has an imprinted statement on the top which warns that the contents may be hot. 2. My new hair dryer has a Ground Fault Circuit Interruptor on its cord (one of them newfangled thingies they use to cut power if the appliance gets “grounded”, say, by dropping it in water). Not only does it come with a warning to test the GFCI _before every use_, but it also comes with a warning not to use the dryer within cord’s reach of any water source. In other words, you can’t use the hair dryer in the bathroom without violating the usage instructions. ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/10 "2003-01-21T07:25:49Z")
Okay, so the oatmeal we buy has little trivia questions and fun facts about dinosaurs. Seems like a pretty hard topic to mess up, right? Until I got to yesterday’s question. “True or false: Dinosaurs are only found in the US.” Aargh! I wanted to tear my hair out. Do they really consider me to be that stupid? ---
**Author:** ![Dragonblink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Dragonblink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragonblink)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/11 "2003-01-21T07:41:13Z")
I bought a stack of CD cases that proudly proclaimed that they “become portable when carried!” Really. Imagine that. What will they come up with next? ---
**Author:** ![meyer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ccd318/32.png) [@meyer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meyer)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/12 "2003-01-21T07:44:19Z")
A few years ago, I bought a Dremel tool. It’s a fine product - a little rotary tool with interchangable bits for drilling, sanding, buffing, cutting, etc. Imprinted on the inside of its case is: " This is not a dental tool " Ewwwwwwwwww. ---
**Author:** ![mala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/258eb7/32.png) [@mala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mala)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/13 "2003-01-21T12:12:54Z")
The instruction manual for my Conair hair dryer contained the following warning: “do not use appliance while sleeping.” ---
**Author:** ![j\_kat\_251](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/71c47a/32.png) [@j\_kat\_251](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j_kat_251)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/14 "2003-01-21T12:19:44Z")
> [@](#): > > I bought a stack of CD cases that proudly proclaimed that they “become portable when carried!” I refuse to believe this. “Warning: may contain traces of peanuts” on a SNICKERS bar is all I’ve got. You know, just in case you missed the whole point of a Snickers bar. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/15 "2003-01-21T12:43:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by j\_kat\_251 \* > \*\*I refuse to believe this. > > “Warning: may contain traces of peanuts” on a SNICKERS bar is all I’ve got. You know, just in case you missed the whole point of a Snickers bar. \*\* I saw the same warning - _on a packet of peanuts_! ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/16 "2003-01-21T13:15:05Z")
I’m sitting hear sipping on a can of diet Pepsi Twist, the lemon flavored Pepsi. Says on the side of the can: “contains no juice.” Ummmm…don’t know how the lemon flavor gets in, but I have always suspected that a cola would “contain no juice.” ---
**Author:** ![martin\_ibn\_martin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@martin\_ibn\_martin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/martin_ibn_martin)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/17 "2003-01-21T13:23:44Z")
My wife has this thingy for doing hair. kind of a foot long plastic hair pin. I believe it’s meant to do some kinda fancy braids. It somes in a paper sleeve, like chopsticks. The sleeve bears the helpful warning “For external use only” She brought it to a Douglas Adams book signing in Seattle and got his sig. He said, “You’re a very sick woman.” and “Americans.” in an exhasperated voice as she walked away. hehe ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/18 "2003-01-21T13:55:29Z")
And for the full list of (probably apocryphal) labels, go [here](http://www.geocities.com/pot_babes/Tipspage2.htm) amonst other places. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/19 "2003-01-21T13:59:56Z")
Or better still, [here](http://www.octanecreative.com/warning/). ---
**Author:** ![Caricci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2003, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907/20 "2003-01-21T14:27:11Z")
Woolworths used to sell an aerosol can of, I assume, air freshner that was called “Good Luck Spray” and there was mention of playing bingo and the lotto on it, among other things. It also had the disclaimer : “Has no supernatural powers”. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-dumbest-thing-youve-seen-on-a-product/149907.md?page=2)