# What's the funniest thing you read/saw/heard on the internet? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 13, 2001, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273 "2001-10-13T17:43:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wooba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/aeb1de/32.png) [@wooba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wooba)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2001, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/1 "2001-10-13T17:43:09Z")
I LOVE to get really funny attachments in my email… unfortunately, the truely histerical things are few and far between. So I’m looking to find some more pics/videos/sounds that just make you piss yourself laughing. For me, the funniest thing I ever got was a word document that had sounds in it. The guy who made it went to Heathrow airport and had fake PA annoucments made of Arabic names. So it came out as things like “My collegue just farted and left the room the bastard”. I laughed for a good 3 or 4 days on that one… Anyone got any recommendations? ---
**Author:** ![Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/ebca7d/32.png) [@Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Violet)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2001, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/2 "2001-10-13T17:47:27Z")
One of the funniest things is the Bert next to Usama bin Laden poster, followed by the Sesame Street gang carrying knives, guns, beer bottles. This stuff has been posted on SDMB too many times for me to count now. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2001, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/3 "2001-10-13T17:57:34Z")
Mirskey’s Worst of the Web. Gone now, damn his eyes. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![tapioca\_tundra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@tapioca\_tundra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapioca_tundra)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2001, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/4 "2001-10-13T18:40:54Z")
```auto ``` ---
**Author:** ![Bob\_Scene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Bob\_Scene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Scene)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2001, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/5 "2001-10-13T18:56:59Z")
Yesterday someone sent me two pictures that showed a guy who was in a crowd of protestors somewhere in the Middle East. In the first picture he’s setting an American flag on fire, and in the second picture he’s on fire himself because the fire spread from the flag to his clothes. ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2001, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/6 "2001-10-13T22:52:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Anticay \* > \*\*~~~[this](http://homepage.ntlworld.com/mil.millington/things.html) \*\* Oh. My. God! ::hysterical laughter:: Thank you for that link! ---
**Author:** ![eunoia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eunoia/32/97_2.png) [@eunoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eunoia)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/7 "2001-10-14T01:55:54Z")
> **[Home of Demotivators® - The World's Best Demotivational Posters](https://despair.com/)** > > Motivational posters don't work. But our legendary demotivational posters don't work even BETTER! Browse our famed Demotivators® line and see for yourself! Received the link from an unlikely source recently. I laughed and laughed. I’ll also be doing all my holiday shopping here (Oh please, please let me get (deleted to protect the guilty)'s name in the ofiice gift exchange!) ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/8 "2001-10-14T04:09:38Z")
[Darwin Awards](http://www.darwinawards.com) It’s always good to know that I’m not the only idiot out there. Funny as heck too. ---
**Author:** ![Spoonbender](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spoonbender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoonbender)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/9 "2001-10-14T06:37:42Z")
I can’t believe no one has yet mentioned [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com). In particular their [September 11 coverage](http://www.theonion.com/onion3734/index.html). ---
**Author:** ![ianzin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ed655f/32.png) [@ianzin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ianzin)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/10 "2001-10-14T08:09:35Z")
I can’t top that superb offering from **Anticay** , but among my own favourite funnies are: the deliciously written [Cavalcade of Christ](http://www.laweekly.com/christ/), the [Advertising Graveyard](http://www.zeldman.com/adgraveyard/) and [Obsessed: Cookbooks from the 1950s](http://www.bluecrow.com/members/dancey/pages/obsess1.htm). There’s a vast collection of ‘funny’ files which typically get sent round as email attachments at the ‘True Facts’ section of the [National Lampoon](http://www.nationallampoon.com/) website. The best source of ‘Top Ten’ lists I’ve found is at the [Hecklers](http://www.hecklers.com/) website. I also think that the ‘It’s a Dysfunctional Life’ photo caption contest at [Spinne Web](http://www.spinnwebe.com/) is worth checking out, with the submissions occasionally approaches genius level. Finally, a guy called Michael Jackson (not that one) used to run a great site for this kind of thing known as The Secret Stash, but it seems to have vanished lately. Anyone know where it’s gone to? ---
**Author:** ![ruadh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d2c977/32.png) [@ruadh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ruadh)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/11 "2001-10-14T08:16:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bob Scene \* > \*\*Yesterday someone sent me two pictures that showed a guy who was in a crowd of protestors somewhere in the Middle East. In the first picture he’s setting an American flag on fire, and in the second picture he’s on fire himself because the fire spread from the flag to his clothes. \*\* It’s twice as funny with the caption accompanying it: > [@](#): > > American flag: $25 > Gasoline: $2 > Cigarette lighter: $2.50 > Catching yourself on fire because you are a terrorist asshole: PRICELESS ---
**Author:** ![ianzin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ed655f/32.png) [@ianzin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ianzin)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/12 "2001-10-14T08:19:27Z")
Oh… and one more. The sites I mentioned before are all _trying_ to be amusing, whereas [this](http://www.monnica.com/) isn’t. It’s just the website of a ‘psychic’, but it features what must be some of the most laughable artwork on the web. She has the last laugh, though - check out that rate card… ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/13 "2001-10-14T16:22:30Z")
Well nobody has mentioned [http://www.lileks.com](http://www.lileks.com) yet…enjoy 😃 ---
**Author:** ![DarkWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee59a6/32.png) [@DarkWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkWriter)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/14 "2001-10-14T16:52:54Z")
This is pretty funny. Especially when you play with the “Word” program: [http://128.241.244.96/portal/uploads/27000/27549\_winrg.swf](http://128.241.244.96/portal/uploads/27000/27549_winrg.swf) Sheri ---
**Author:** ![SatyrDave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@SatyrDave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SatyrDave)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/15 "2001-10-14T18:34:32Z")
Go to [http://www.adcritic.com](http://www.adcritic.com) and in the top ten list on the left view the “John West Bear Fight” video. I laughed until I stopped. I also have saved a video of a young Chimpanzee smelling his stinky fingers, but I can not find a link to it right now. Very funny if anyone might know of a link. ---
**Author:** ![Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7cd45c/32.png) [@Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Glory)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2001, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/16 "2001-10-14T21:39:40Z")
[http://www.supergreg.com/](http://www.supergreg.com/) You must play the video at the bottom!!! ---
**Author:** ![RoboDude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bbe5ce/32.png) [@RoboDude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RoboDude)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/17 "2001-10-15T00:03:05Z")
[http://www.seanbaby.com](http://www.seanbaby.com) [http://www.somethingawful.com](http://www.somethingawful.com) [http://www.videogamedc.com](http://www.videogamedc.com) ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/18 "2001-10-15T01:01:38Z")
YOU ASKED FOR IT. (Too lazy to type it myself so I C&P) Chili Taster -=-=-=-=-=-=- Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Taster named FRANK, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast when he got roped into testing chili: "Recently I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment, and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges and (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted. Here are the scorecards from the event: Chili # 1: Mike’s Maniac Mobster Monster Chili JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick. JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild! FRANK: Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that’s the worst one. These Texans are crazy. Chili # 2: Arthur’s Afterburner Chili JUDGE ONE: Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang. JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously. FRANK: Keep this out of reach of children! I’m not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face. Chili # 3: Fred’s Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans. JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of red peppers. FRANK: Call the EPA, I’ve located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now, get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I’m getting shit-faced from all the beer. Chili # 4: Bubba’s Black Magic JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing. JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili. FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it, is it possible to burn-out taste buds? Sally, the bar maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills; that ugly bitch is starting to look HOT, just like this nuclear-waste I’m eating. Is chili an aphrodisiac? Chili # 5: Linda’s Legal Lip Remover JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive. JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef; could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement. FRANK: My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. I wonder if I’m burning my lips off? It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks! Chili # 6: Vera’s Very Vegetarian Variety JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice and peppers. JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb. FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I shit myself when I farted and I’m worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally, she must be kinkier than I thought. Can’t feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone! Chili # 7: Susan’s Screaming Sensation Chili JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers. JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried about Judge number 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably. FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn’t feel a damn thing. I’ve lost the sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like shit to match my damn shirt. At least during the autopsy they’ll know what killed me. I’ve decided to stop breathing, it’s too painful. Screw it, I’m not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I’ll just suck it in through the 4 inch hole in my stomach. Chili # 8: Helen’s Mount Saint Chili JUDGE ONE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence. JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced chili, neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he’s going to make it. Poor Yank, wonder how he’d have reacted to a really hot chili? FRANK: (editor’s note: Judge #3 was unable to report) ---
**Author:** ![Diesel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6bbea6/32.png) [@Diesel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diesel)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/19 "2001-10-15T05:03:51Z")
[http://www.stileproject.com/weeee.html](http://www.stileproject.com/weeee.html) …aaaaAAAND WEEEEEEEEE!!! ---
**Author:** ![Chickenhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7cd45c/32.png) [@Chickenhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chickenhead)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273/20 "2001-10-15T06:24:49Z")
Diesel. That video. My God. so funny. I have finally seen myself in others. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-funniest-thing-you-read-saw-heard-on-the-internet/87273.md?page=2)