# What's the goofiest thing you've done because you weren't wearing your glasses? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 16, 2003, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859 "2003-01-16T00:03:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/1 "2003-01-16T00:03:16Z")
Having worn glasses/contact lenses since I was 7, I have made a number of silly mistakes when I wasn’t wearing them. I just added another to my lifetime count – the cat likes to sit by my chair while I’m eating and beg for food. Yes, I give in and feed the Gryff from the table. Yes, I know that’s terrible. Anyway, I was eating, and saw the cat sitting next to my chair. Every so often, I dropped a sliver of chicken down so the Gryff could eat it. Eventually I noticed he wasn’t eating any of the chicken bits. That’s because I wasn’t feeding my cat, I was feeding a SPRAY BOTTLE OF 409. This doesn’t, however, beat the worst thing I’ve ever done as a result of not wearing my glasses. One evening a while back, I glanced out the window and noticed that there was a very bright, full moon in the sky. How romantic, I thought! Mr. Del was due home from work any minute, and seeing that beautiful full moon put me in a sentimental mood. I dimmed the lights, opened a bottle of wine, and when he arrived home, I called him over to come look out the window at the night sky. Him: What are we looking at? Me (dreamily): The full moon. Him: Where at? Me: Right there! Him: Where? Me: (points) Right there! Him: That’s the neighbor’s BUG ZAPPER. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/2 "2003-01-16T00:42:49Z")
Delph, your vision must be a lot better than mine, because I wouldn’t go glasses/contacts-less long enough to do these silly things. Unless I can’t find my glasses, which can lead to LiveJournal posts like [this.](http://www.livejournal.com/talkpost.bml?journal=postmoderngirl&itemid=118116') ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/3 "2003-01-16T00:44:17Z")
Um, [correct link.](http://www.livejournal.com/talkpost.bml?journal=postmoderngirl&itemid=118116) ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/4 "2003-01-16T00:56:56Z")
dumb thing i did while wearing glasses, lead me to not wearing glasses. we were in a state park. after swimming in the lake i went into the rest room to change from swimsuit to shorts and tee. there was a shelf over the hole of the outhouse. when i leaned over to get my swimsuit my glasses fell off into the hole. i stumbled out of the rest room thing and called for my parents. 2 blurs turned up and i explained what happened. mum spoke to one of the rangers and found out if we wanted to put our name and address on the list of “lost in the hole” items; at the end of the summer when they “flushed” the outhouses, and found the lost items, they would send the glasses to us. we decided against and i got to watch the world blur by until i got home and found last year’s glasses. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/5 "2003-01-16T01:03:24Z")
I have gone looking for my glasses – while I was wearing them. Once I realized that I could see . . . (This is funnier if you know just HOW nearsighted I am and how LITTLE attention I would have to be paying not to notice . . .) ---
**Author:** ![AntaresJB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c2a13f/32.png) [@AntaresJB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AntaresJB)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/6 "2003-01-16T01:23:41Z")
I once thought I put my left contact in backwards cuz things were still fuzzy in that eye, so I was poking around, pulling a little, trying to get it out… until I close my left eye and look down a little and see the lens stuck to the full length mirror I’m standing in front of, then realizing that I’ve just been poking and pulling at my eyeball. Ewwww! But yeah, I can’t see worth a pile of dog crap, so I simply DON’t go without glasses or contacts. (been wearing glasses since I was five, when I got into school and they realized everything more than two feet in front of my face was impossibly fuzzy.) ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/7 "2003-01-16T02:24:43Z")
I forgot where I put my glasses and _TA DA_ couldn’t see to find them. Yeah… I went all day without glasses… ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/8 "2003-01-16T03:36:35Z")
I almost always leave my glasses on my desk, but there are a couple of other places around the house where they might be found. One morning, I turned on the computer, sat down, and reached for my glasses. They weren’t there, so I looked in the other places…no glasses. My desk is a mess, so I went to make sure I hadn’t overlooked them. They were on the desk _chair_ and kind of twisty. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![ratty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ccd318/32.png) [@ratty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratty)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/9 "2003-01-16T06:03:56Z")
Before I started wearing glasses, I figured out that I could bring distant things into focus by pulling the skin on the sides of my eyes. Why this works I have no idea, but it does. Once I went to the movies, and just before the movie started, I realized I had forgotten my glasses. There was no turning back- the theatre was a good 45 minutes from home. So I sat there through the entire movie holding out the skin on either side of my eyes so I could focus on the film. It worked, but you should have seen the looks I was getting from other people. ---
**Author:** ![JerseyDiamond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8491ac/32.png) [@JerseyDiamond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JerseyDiamond)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/10 "2003-01-16T06:12:12Z")
**Delphica** , that made me laugh out loud. I actually had to read it, out loud, to Joe\_Cool; it was that funny. You’re the best… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/11 "2003-01-16T06:38:20Z")
Nothing too conspicuously silly… just seeing my cat, and turning, and having it be dirty laundry; going back to what I was doing; seeing my cat, and turning, and having it be dirty laundry; going back to what I was doing; seeing my cat, and turning, and having it be dirty laundry; going back to what I was doing; seeing my cat… ---
**Author:** ![Inky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7feea3/32.png) [@Inky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inky_1)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/12 "2003-01-16T07:29:38Z")
Hoo boy. My whole life has been spent with my nose in either a book or a sketchpad, thus I’m a bit on the nearsighted side, and have: Asked a mannequin at Macy’s if she knew the way to the menswear department. Once walked up to a high-definition television showing a video of tropical fish thinking it was a _real_ fishtank. Rescued a stuffed hedgehog from the middle of a busy road (in my defense, it sure _looked_ like a kitten). ---
**Author:** ![Mith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Mith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mith)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/13 "2003-01-16T10:47:14Z")
went waterliding. no glasses. went into the male washroom. oops eaten moldy cheese. ---
**Author:** ![blinx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@blinx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blinx)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/14 "2003-01-16T11:24:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ratty \* > \*\*Before I started wearing glasses, I figured out that I could bring distant things into focus by pulling the skin on the sides of my eyes. Why this works I have no idea, but it does. > \*\* That works for me too, I belive it’s because nearsightedness/myopia is the result of an eyeball that is too long or a cornea which is too curved - and my guess is that pulling the skin on the side of your eyes can deform the eyeball just enough for the image to form on the retina instead of infront of it. When I where younger I refused to wear my glasses and I’ve spend many hours in class pulling at the side of my eyes so I could see the blackboard. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/15 "2003-01-16T13:13:09Z")
Well, there was this one time I wore a plaid skirt and a floral top. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/16 "2003-01-16T13:13:35Z")
Oh, Lord… I wear contacts now, but I’ve worn glasses since third grade. Horrible vision. Blind as a bat. In college I had to call my brother once to come over because I couldn’t find my glasses. He walked in and said, “they’re on the table”. Once when I was in elementary school, I was walking around my neighborhood without my glasses on. Don’t ask me why, just one of those stupid things kids do. AsI walked past a classmates house, I saw her and her mother get outof the car and walk towards the house. “Hey, Tammy!” I yelled. No response. _Tammy!"_ No response. “TAMMY!” Still no response, although by now they were staring at me. “Well, be that way then!” I yelled. Then her confused mother finally yelled back “That’s not Tammy, that’s her _grandmother!_” I had mistaken a grandmother for a 12 year old girl. Same height and general outline, I guess. I wanted to crawl into a hole. ---
**Author:** ![Leifsmama](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a698b9/32.png) [@Leifsmama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leifsmama)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/17 "2003-01-16T15:41:12Z")
**Delphica** why were you eating without your glasses? If I did that God only knows what I’d be feeding myself! I know I’ve done stupid things when I can’t find my glasses, but I can’t remember off the top of my head. I bet if Leifsdad were here he’d be able to relate a dozen stories. ---
**Author:** ![Coda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Coda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coda)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/18 "2003-01-16T15:46:47Z")
I once got a very passionate kiss from my sister-in-law thinking I was my twin brother. we were up at our cabin in VT and she left her glasses on her bed stand. It was around 7 am and I had come in to get my brother to go fishing. Thank God she had her clothes on… ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/19 "2003-01-16T16:31:54Z")
**kyla** , ha! If I touch my nose to the computer screen when I’m not wearing my glasses, I can usually pick up on any typos. Oh my gosh **Rocking Chair** , I am now insanely curious to find out what items people DID put on the list of things they want back from the outside. Curious in a repulsed way, I mean. **Scarlett** , I have gone looking for my glasses while they were in my _hand_. It’s just part of the routine, I guess. **AntaresJB** , having worn contacts since I was a fairly little kid, very few things about them skeeve me out. That skeeved me out. 🙂 Story of my life, **clayton\_e**! **hillbilly queen** Ouch! So far I have managed to avoid that one. **ratty** and **blinx** , I think I vaguely remember a Cecil column that talks about that – I’m going to see if I can find it. **Matt\_mcl** , I’d argue that dirty laundry often looks very much like a cat even with my glasses on! 🙂 **Inky-** … the mannequin story made my day! Going into the wrong bathroom (by mistake, not on purpose), is actually a fear of mine, **Mith**. The recent thread about that almost gave me an anxiety attack. **Pravnik** , did you ever wonder if Tammy’s mom went home and told that story to Tammy’s great mortification over dinner? Good point **leifsmama** , I have no excuse for eating without my glasses, my eyes were tired I guess. **Coda** , when I posted this thread, I was wondering if anyone would have a story about kissing someone by mistake! So yay on you! Thanks **JD** , that was sweet! And **Ginger** , hush up you! (Actually folks, **Ginger** is sweet too, because she offered to trade shirts with me.) ---
**Author:** ![Theobroma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5a626/32.png) [@Theobroma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Theobroma)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859/20 "2003-01-16T16:37:56Z")
Couple of days ago, I woke up and grabbed my glasses, which were on my bedstand, where I always leave them when I sleep. I put them on and…I STILL COULDN’T SEE!! I looked at the clock–couldn’t see the time! Tapped the lenses, yes, they were on. Took off the glasses–looked at them blearily–put them back on–looked across the room–STILL COULDN"T SEE! I thought maybe I’d had a stroke or a TIA. Then I noticed that they fit kinda funny. Then I remembered that my 8-year-old kid, whose vision has just begun to rot, took off his glasses to jump and flip on my bed the night before. Then I saw my own glasses. No stroke after all. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-goofiest-thing-youve-done-because-you-werent-wearing-your-glasses/148859.md?page=2)