# What's the largest thing you've ever inserted into your anus? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 18, 2000, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918 "2000-08-18T22:43:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/1 "2000-08-18T22:43:09Z")
Okay, I didn’t really expect any posts to this thread. I just wanted to see how many people would LOOK at it! 😛 (But feel free to answer if you have something to share. I’m sure _someone_ out there in the Teeming Millions wants to know.) ---
**Author:** ![eyor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@eyor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eyor)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/2 "2000-08-18T22:51:02Z")
Does it count if it was accidental? and by the way, should you reply to this, congratulations on your 1/4 thousandth post! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/3 "2000-08-18T22:51:17Z")
that loud sound you hear is Satan smacking his monitor… ---
**Author:** ![Booker57](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Booker57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Booker57)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/4 "2000-08-18T22:53:18Z")
Where the h\*\*l is matt\_mcl when you need him.MTS ---
**Author:** ![astrangefish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bbce88/32.png) [@astrangefish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astrangefish)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/5 "2000-08-18T22:55:25Z")
The Lakers. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/6 "2000-08-18T23:04:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by astrangefish \* > \*\*The Lakers. \*\* Okaaay, moving on… > [@](#): > > _originally posted by eyor_ > **Does it count if it was accidental? > and by the way, should you reply to this, congratulations on your 1/4 thousandth post!** Thanks, eyor. I hadn’t noticed. Does this mean I’m not a newbie anymore? To answer your question…I think it counts no matter how it got there. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/7 "2000-08-18T23:21:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Booker57 \* > **Where the h** l is matt\_mcl when you need him.MTS \*\* Planning to get a large thing inserted into my anus, if you must know. ---
**Author:** ![poohpah\_chalupa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/91b2a8/32.png) [@poohpah\_chalupa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/poohpah_chalupa)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/8 "2000-08-19T00:36:12Z")
…according to my boss: my head, size 7-1/2. thank you. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/9 "2000-08-19T00:41:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lizard \* > \*\*I just wanted to see how many people would LOOK at it! 😛 > \*\* I’m such a sucker. No, I’m not sharing. ---
**Author:** ![astrangefish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bbce88/32.png) [@astrangefish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astrangefish)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/10 "2000-08-19T00:50:49Z")
Are we counting heavily greased items and vegetables? erm… Just curious. ---
**Author:** ![DarbyV](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/779978/32.png) [@DarbyV](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarbyV)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/11 "2000-08-19T00:54:04Z")
Well…3/4 of my husband…his feet are still dangling out. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/12 "2000-08-19T01:17:53Z")
Well, we have this pool table in the rec room of our house. I am also something of an amateur nudist. One night, after a bunch of drinks, I was messing around in there, and I laid my pool cue through the back of an open backed chair. I went into the kitchen to get another screwdriver, then felt tired, so I sat down… ok not really just kidding about all of it ::crawling back under rock:: ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/13 "2000-08-19T01:44:49Z")
I didn’t take the time to measure anything, so I can’t be sure. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/14 "2000-08-19T02:07:22Z")
Darby: BWAAAAHahahahahaha! You took my answer! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/15 "2000-08-19T02:55:23Z")
I can assure you that the largest thing that Lizard has ever inserted into his anus has been his HEAD. Unfortunately, it has remained there ever since. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/16 "2000-08-19T04:36:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Portnoy \* > \*\*I can assure you that the largest thing that Lizard has ever inserted into his anus has been his HEAD. Unfortunately, it has remained there ever since. \*\* Why Portnoy! I’m blushing at the _zealousness_, the _audacity_, the pure _ **rudeness** _ of your totally unprovoked attack. I could go on, but things like this are better left to the Pit. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/17 "2000-08-19T05:21:49Z")
From which direction? ---
**Author:** ![Revedge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecae2f/32.png) [@Revedge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revedge)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/18 "2000-08-19T07:21:24Z")
I managed to stick my head in my ass over in the PIT today. Does that count? ---
**Author:** ![Major\_Feelgud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3be4f8/32.png) [@Major\_Feelgud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Major_Feelgud)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/19 "2000-08-19T08:20:27Z")
Katie Couric is busy right now so she asked me to answer for her: A scope, with a light, 26 inches, on national TV, while talking. ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2000, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918/20 "2000-08-19T08:39:57Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by AudreyK \* > I’m such a_\* sucker\*\*. No, I’m not sharing. \*\* (Emphasis added) _AHEM_ He said “ANUS!” 😛 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-largest-thing-youve-ever-inserted-into-your-anus/29918.md?page=2)