# What's the manliest weapon? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 3, 2014, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259 "2014-04-03T15:45:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Richard\_North](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@Richard\_North](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_North)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/1 "2014-04-03T15:45:54Z")
Hey guys, what in your opinion is the manliest weapon??? Dog is man’s best friend, a nice weapon is man’s second best friend. Weapons should be chosen wisely. They can enhance manliness or detract from your manliness!!! Pepper spray is the least manly weapon. It’s lightweight. It doesn’t make any loud noises. It doesn’t require any advanced training. It cannot destroy anything. They even come in pink!!! That’s obvious though. To figure out what’s the manliest weapon is a little more difficult. A lot of real weapons have a lot of good things going on for them. And, please, share any experiences or ancedotes!!! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/2 "2014-04-03T15:47:11Z")
Mace and chain. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/3 "2014-04-03T15:51:33Z")
I’m going with war hammer. I’ve seen depictions of women fighting with swords, axes, all manner of guns, knives, chains, maces, what-have-you but I never see them fighting with a good ole war hammer. Queue someone digging up a picture now but I did do a half-assed Google Image search which was crippled by “Warhammer” being a popular game franchise so you get a lot of “Warhammer” women without seeing women holding actual war hammers. ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Quatro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bc8723/32.png) [@Mr\_Quatro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Quatro)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/4 "2014-04-03T15:51:47Z")
The tongue: St James 3:4-8 > [@](#): > > A ship is very big, and it is pushed by strong winds. But a very small rudder controls that big ship, making it go wherever the pilot wants. > > It is the same with the tongue. It is a small part of the body, but it brags about great things. > > A big forest fire can be started with only a little flame. > > And the tongue is like a fire. It is a whole world of evil among the parts of our bodies. > The tongue spreads its evil through the whole body. > > The tongue is set on fire by hell, and it starts a fire that influences all of life. > > People can tame every kind of wild animal, bird, reptile, and fish, and they have tamed them, but no one can tame the tongue. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_North](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@Richard\_North](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_North)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/5 "2014-04-03T15:52:24Z")
I can’t create a poll. It didn’t pop up as an option. Well, here are the weapons: -Gun -Grenade -Blunt object such as a baton or crowbar -Brass knuckles -Knife -Bow and Arrow -Whip -Dagger -Other??? ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/6 "2014-04-03T15:52:41Z")
I believe the traditional choice is the sword, since it requires both strength and skill to use. However, discounting any weapon because of perceived cultural incompatibility is a weakness. Weapons should be judged by their utility in the situations where they will be used. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/7 "2014-04-03T15:53:37Z")
> [@Mr\_Quatro](#): > > no one can tame the tongue Hott! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![I\_Know\_Nothing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f04885/32.png) [@I\_Know\_Nothing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Know_Nothing)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/8 "2014-04-03T15:53:53Z")
chainsaw oh…and stories…on time I was attacked by this rabid wooden fencepost… ---
**Author:** ![PastTense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pasttense/32/14550_2.png) [@PastTense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PastTense)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/9 "2014-04-03T15:55:40Z")
Probably all the manly weapons were in use in the Middle Ages. Nowadays people want effective weapons like guns–which aren’t particularly manly See: > **[Medieval Weapons](https://www.medievalwarfare.info/weapons.htm)** > > 100 ways to die in the middle ages I think the blunt hand weapons look manly: > **[Medieval Weapons](https://www.medievalwarfare.info/weapons.htm#blunt)** > > 100 ways to die in the middle ages ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/10 "2014-04-03T15:57:24Z")
Bayonet. When you run out of bullets in your manly gun, it turns it into a long knife/sword. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/11 "2014-04-03T16:01:32Z")
Hands ---
**Author:** ![I\_Know\_Nothing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f04885/32.png) [@I\_Know\_Nothing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Know_Nothing)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/12 "2014-04-03T16:01:51Z")
Buster Sword Guy [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/Un1M7xbCCIs/maxresdefault.jpg "REAL Buster Sword") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Un1M7xbCCIs) ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/13 "2014-04-03T16:02:05Z")
Ron White reports that he took a Viagra and felt like he could hunt with his penis. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/14 "2014-04-03T16:02:14Z")
Pardon me while I whip this out. Damn, ninja’d ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/15 "2014-04-03T16:06:37Z")
Don’t fight history! [A club](http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs36/i/2008/287/e/6/Fred_Flintstone_beating_Polly_by_Anti_Polly_Club.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/16 "2014-04-03T16:26:45Z")
As others have mentioned, dicks of course. A true pissing contest. Nothing beats a powerful stream. Nothing says manly quite so much as whipping it out and going pee wherever. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/17 "2014-04-03T16:26:57Z")
I really have to go with the two-handed longsword on this one. The kind you have to wear on your back instead at at your side. The sharp pointy thing that can take off an immortal’s head. “There can be only one.” ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/18 "2014-04-03T16:36:57Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > As others have mentioned, dicks of course. A true pissing contest. Nothing beats a powerful stream. Nothing says manly quite so much as whipping it out and going pee wherever. If you can fracture my skull by hitting it with your dick, I’ll certainly concede you are more manly than me. ---
**Author:** ![Boogly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Boogly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boogly)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/19 "2014-04-03T16:37:58Z")
Bare knuckle brawling. Sans flesh for pure bare knuckles. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2014, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259/20 "2014-04-03T16:49:55Z")
A real man doesn’t need to carry a weapon. He can kill using only whatever happens to be around at the time. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-manliest-weapon/685259.md?page=2)