Adding to this, the dialogue was horrible. Consistantly horrible. People talked in either cutsie quips repeated endlessly (“Hi”/“Hi yourself!”) or really long, drawn-out monologues.
In the same vein, I’m currently re-reading James Robinson’s STARMAN which, read in a lump are atrocious.
The main character is a completely unlikable prick (granted, he gets better–one of the nicer bits in the strip is that the main character does grow up–but at the beginning of the strip, Jack needs to be kicked in the nuts. Repeatedly), nearly every single person talks and thinks exactly the same (they’re all artsy-fartsy effete pseudo-intellectuals)*, the pacing is atrocious (the Jack-In-Space arc lasted, what? 8 years…or did it just feel that way?), the characterization bad and good heavens the dialogue is the worst ever set down in the entire history of comics. And I’m including stuff that Jack Kirby scripted. Some two (close) quotes that stick in my mind):
(Jack to Sandman) “What means danger to such as we?”
(Jack to Captain Marvel) “What do you know of pain, and human frailty, you with your smooth muscles and supple thighs?”
And this is typical.
I mean, c’mon. This is terrible, terrible stuff. But I loved it when it was coming out.
Fenris
*There were the thugs with doctorates in musical theater history who discussed obscure points of Sondehiem’s musicals, the thug with the doctorate in film history who, while snuffing people talked about obscure actors who played Philip Marlow, Jack, who, in the middle of a fight scene will give lectures on the history of Womb Chairs, Copperhead who collects antique radios, etc. Hey James–you wanna make Jack into a “Mary Sue”? Great! Fine! Be my guest! But not every! single! character! should share your interests.
I loved the X-Men when I was a kid. I started reading around say, 110 or so and petered out in the 150s. Call it when I was 11 - 15 or so. Something like that.
Last year I got nostalgic and went and bought the trade paperback of the Death of the Phoenix.
Ugh! It was TERRIBLE. I mean pukishly terrible!
There was a kernel of a good story in there and I liked the art fairly well.
But my GOD, the dialogue!
“THROWING ROCKS WILL AVAIL YOU NOT AGAINST THE MIGHT OF THE LIVING STEEL OF COLOSSUS!”
EVERY, FARKING, TIME!!!
I wanted to have one of the villians yell, “SHUT UP! I’ll surrender if you’ll stop with the cheesy, self-absorbed dialogue!”
I came into this thread to mention Walt Simonson’s Thor, but I see several others have beaten me to the punch.
GREAT run. the last stand of the Executioner was the first and last time I was that moved by a comic. Paraphrasing:
...and when a new arrival asks who it is to whom even Hela bows her head, the answer is always the same. "he stood alone at Gjallarbru" and that is answer enough.
You know, I’ve never reread all of Starman in a lump, but I did collect it from the earliest issues, even over the course of years when I wasn’t buying any other comics. It was one of the only constants in my life from 10th grade well into law school, and reading Robinson’s latest issue was often the highlight of my month. As much as I love Justice League International, Preacher, Allred and Milligan’s X-Force, Sleeper, and Wildcats (among others), Starman is probably my all-time favorite series, and my favorite run by a single writer.
