My college roomie was a Greek National who never talked about anything but strippers & how much he hated the Turks.
I think that if he ever met a Turkish stripper, his brain would explode.
A depressed lesbian with a crush on my female, hetro self. She had major self-esteem issues. She told me that I really was a lesbian; however, she was sure that she had disgusted me so much that I would never be with a woman like I was supposed to be. I’m pretty sure that I never was a lesbian to begin with.
She had some compulsive behaviors, pulling her eyelashes out and picking at her skin until it bled. She was a cutter, hacking away at her arms and legs, often when we had guests over. I’m telling you, nothing kills a party faster than one of the hostesses coming into the living room with a butcher knife in hand, smiling radiently as she shows off her fresh slash marks. She did not use sheets or pillowcases. Instead, she slept on her bare mattress and pillow- which were stained with blood from her self-multilations.
She moved out and did the right thing- checked herself into a psych ward. While she was there, she met a woman, a suicidal married mother of three, twenty years older than my ex-roomie. I hope they found happiness together, but I’m not optimistic.
She owed me money, but I never followed up it. It really wasn’t worth it.
Boy, talk about resurrecting old threads. . . . .
[sub]'Course, it’s different when the thread is mine. 
[/sub]
I briefly had Jack for a roommate. Nice enough guy, I guess. But his drag queen persona was Jackie O. He had Jackie dresses and pillbox hats, and the crowning touch for his outfits was a glob of calf brain applied to a shoulder and breast.
That was a brief living arrangement.
Mine is not nearly as entertaining (and scary) as some…
Had a horrible, snotty, bitchy, cheap, etc, roomie. I went out of town for a long weekend. When I came back, I saw she had cooked. In my pots and pans. Which were still on the stove. And the food was looking pretty old and moldy.
Well, it’s my stuff, but I’m not cleaning it. Days go by.
One day the pots and pans, which had started to smell, were gone!
Completely.
I found them later- she had thrown them out the bathroom window into the neighbors yard.
I had a college roommate that couldn’t think 10 seconds into the future.
She’d light an ex’s love letter and then look around for a place to drop it. And then act surprized when tossing it into a metal wastebasket caused a scortch mark on the carpet below.
At a room check she hastily tried to get rid of a verboten bottle of wine by tossing it blindly out the window! It could have killed the people on the sidewalk below. But, fortunately for them, it smashed against the window frame and spashed a shower of glass and wine all over our room. When she had the nerve to deny it (the whole hall heard the noise), we both were punished as equally denying involvement.
umm, I already shared my roommate stories, but I couldn’t help but add my dad’s:
My dad had a roommate in college who would get drunk everynight and come home. Often times, he would projectile vomit onto the wall from the top bunk of their bunk bed. One time the guy got a tapeworm and talked about it endlessly. He finally passed the tapeworm but decided to ‘save’ it in the toilet until my dad came home, just so he could have a look too.
That would be the transsexual lesbian prostitute.
She was actually way normal and is still one of my best friends…
it used to shit me that she’d cook up big time (she was an apprentice chef as well) but never wash the dishes or clean up after herself in any way.
She also used to leave her stash of pot on the table next to the computer, which worried me in case we were visited by the rental agent.
Her 10 year old daughter, on the other hand, was just strange.
But i guess all 10-year-olds are :rolleyes:
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE??? The roommates described in these threads are the most nasty, disgusting, freaky, rude people I have ever heard of. I can hardly believe people like that exist!
Thank god I have never really had a roommate, except for half a semester in college. (She was a bitch and after that I always lived alone.)
My first roommate in college was named Welbourne Frederick Bronaugh III. But he told me to just call him “Fred.”
Fred was elected Vice-President of our dorm, which was a 4 story mens only dorm. This was before anyone got to know him, 'cause he wouldn’t even have been nominated if they did know him.
Being Vice-President of your dorm is a ceremonial honor at the very best, it gives you no special privileges/honors/powers/authority, hell the RA’s have more authority/power, then the Vice President of the dorm does.
Fred never seemed to understand that.
Fred had a problem.
He wouldn’t bathe.
Now, you might say, that’s not so bad, you can cover up BO if you use deodorant/cologne/aftershave.
That is very true.
But after a certain period of time without bathing goes by, the stench overpowers even the best deodorant/cologne.
Fred didn’t bathe for 68 days in a row.
He did brush his teeth.
But he didn’t bathe, and in this instance bathe covers taking a bath, a shower splashing your face in the morning, going for a swim, sitting in a hot tub/ whirlpool, standing out in a rain/snow storm.
It was appalling.
It was unbelievable.
Fred managed to clear the entire “study” dorm out simply by taking off his shoes and his socks while he was sitting in the lounge.
He would take off his socks and hang them on the radiator to dry them.
One time, after he had started to bathe again I witnessed the quickest bathing that I have ever seen.
I had gone down to the showers and in the time it took for me to take off my robe and shorts, hang up my towel, robe and shorts, take off my sandals, and get my razor, soap, and shampoo all ready, Fred had come in to the showers, gotten undressed, gotten under the shower, dreid off and left.
He wasn’t under the water for more then 5 seconds.
Just astonishing.
I haven’t had any strange roommates. Instead, I’ve been the strangest roommate anybody has ever had.
A girl who looked Amish but secretly wanted to be a vamp role-playing sub-culture geek. Unfortunately for her, her idea of dressing up as a vamp was to wear red pumps.
She had hair down to her ass, and when she got the clean dishes out of the washer, her hair would sweep over them. :shudder: She was really protective of her pillows, so one time to piss her off my friend threw one of her decorative pillows on the living room floor and stepped on it. She ran out of the room crying. She constantly talked about her boyfriend. One day he finally came over. While she was getting dressed, he told us he wasn’t her boyfriend but that she had been stalking him for months and he finally agreed to spend a day with her. He never called her again.
Here is an image of the illustrious Manuel Pardo. He looks just a tad bit on the creepy side. The site informs us that he was convicted of killing at least two people.
I’ve had a few. First there was Becky the hairdresser. I knew she cut hair in the house and it did seem as if she had a disproportionately large number of older male clients but eventually I found out she was giving TOPLESS haircuts.
Then there was an older woman who I thought would be neat and quiet. She asked if I minded if she had company. I thopught of having her grandkids over or havng some other old geiser over for movies so I said it was fine. Little did I know I walked in one evening and the house was readxy for her company. She had emptied virtually everything I owned except for the furnitureand filled it with her stuff like all these cute little things you’d make in a craft class - okay weird but…whatever. Then I saw it…she’d taken down a painting I had and replacedit with a nude oil painting of herself. Eeeeeew.
Then there was Steve aka “Whitey” red hair and the whitest skin I ever imagined a human could have. He was in town on a golf scholarship from a small town in Iowa and had this whole Golly-gee thing going for him about living in a “big city”…kind of cute in a hokey way but a nice enough guy except for leaving an unwashed pot with oatmeal residue in the sink every morning. Then one day he got a kidney stone and laid on the couch for at least a week and I seriously thought he was going to die there. Totally freaked me out and he refused to go tothe doctor because he didn’t have insurance. YIKES! Can I pick 'em or what?
Oh yeah and then there was the girl with the cat that pissed all over EVERYTHING and couldn’t understand why I asked her to keep the cat in her room.
Deja Vu
Nancy was about 5’1" tall, 250lbs, and going bald. 
Not my roomate, but my best friend’s roomate is pretty wierd-
-She leaves the apartment a total mess. My friend doesn’t mind her being a slob as long as she limits it to her own room, but the mess extends to communal areas (family room, kitchen) and NEVER seems to clean it up. Any time anybody starts to bring up the fact that 99% of the mess in the house is cause by her (ergo she should clean it up!) that person gets sucked into a yelling match with a 20 year-old girl more than capable of having the mother of all temper tantrums :eek:
-Her best friend practically lives there, because they disconnected her phone at her house so she stays at my friend’s house to use his computer to chat on AIM for hours at a time. That or compusively cleaning- She’s either on AIM or cleaning up the house, neither of which strike me as wierd except thats pretty much ALL she does for 12 hours at a time. She had gotten laid off from work so she has a lot more free time I guess 
-The wierdest thing, though is that even though her and my friend aren’t in a relationship (they dated for a bit like a year ago, but he broke up with her when he found out she was cheating on him with an ex-boyfriend) she ACTS like she and him are an item. This confuses the hell out of people who don’t know the awkward details of the situation. The lengths she goes to put up this fascade are pretty extensive; she especially likes to put on this ‘act’ when I’m around. Thus, when I visit my friend for an evening of drinking and video games, she is all over him; sitting on his lap, kissing/hugging him like crazy, talking in a baby voice. I thought she acted like this all the time, but apparently she only goes into this ‘mode’ when a certain few (including me) are around her :mad:
I mercifully can’t recall the names of several of my freaky roommates so I shall refer to them as Lucy and Shelly, from the cacti in the movie “Kalifornia.”
FR1: Alan. Alan would have sex in the room with me in it. The first time he did it I left. The second time Next Gen was on and I was in the room first so I refused to leave. After he finished and went into the bathroom I told the girl I was willing to leave as long as they gave me some decent notice. She said “no no, it’s your room too.” Later I figured out Alan was an exhibitionist and a narcissist who got off on my being there and fantasizing that I wanted him. After he broke up with this girl he hooked up with the town pump, who was also a Satanist, then moved on to her best friend, with whom he discovered that, in combination, they were the 26th most powerful psychic being in the universe.
FR2: Tina. Young Asian woman. Would insist that I not put my garbage in her garbage can and, if she saw any there, would pick it out and throw it on the kitchen floor. Used to cover up my Lynda Carter Wonder Woman fridge magnet because it “stared at” her (she covered it with a skull magnet so apparently being stared at by a skull is less disconcerting than being stared at by Lynda Carter).
FR3: “Lucy.” Not so much a freak as an evil bitch. Let several people squat in her room which I honestly didn’t care about until the squatters started breaking my things and stealing my food. After I got them kicked out she moved in her babydaddy, who would frequently puff up his chest about how he was gonna live with his babymama (fine, live here, I don’t care just sign the fucking lease).
FR4: “Shelly.” One of the squatters. Called the cops on me after I had her thrown out and started throwing away the mail she had delivered to my house.
FR5: Fred. Had himself taken to detox lockup on Thanksgiving Day.
FR6: Never learned her name. She was actually crazy. I know this because I saw the meds she was on and my crazy ex-boyfriend was on the same ones. She would do things like carry my tub of margarine around with her in her fanny pack. One day she was just…gone.