# Whats the stupidest question ever asked?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158
**Category:** Factual Questions
**Created:** [March 3, 2000, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158 "2000-03-03T20:56:00Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Dandmb50](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dandmb50)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/21 "2000-03-04T01:48:00Z")
actually I think my signature line says it all, but then your question was very near the top.
* * *
Please feel free to email me.
I’m not conceited, I’m convinced!
[Dandmb50@aol.com](mailto:Dandmb50@aol.com)
The only stupid question is the one YOU do not ask !!
[http://members.aol.com/dandmb50/1.html](http://members.aol.com/dandmb50/1.html)
Remember it’s nice to be important but important to be nice.
---
### Author:  [@Soup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soup)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/22 "2000-03-04T01:55:00Z")
When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
---
### Author:  [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/23 "2000-03-04T04:02:00Z")
Lexicon, you forgot to add “Here’s your sign.” at the end.
---
### Author:  [@Lexicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lexicon)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/24 "2000-03-04T04:43:00Z")
Nah, I figured it would be obvious, but now that you mention it…
I guess I should’ve put quotes around that section so that it didn’t look like I was plagiarizing…which it does.
I feel so sheepish.
BAAAA-AAAH!
Thanks Kat!
* * *
how did it start? well i don’t know i just feel the craving. i see the flesh and it smells fresh and it’s just there for the taking…
VvvV
“Winners never quit and quitters never win, but those who never win and never quit are idiots.”
---
### Author:  [@jayburner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayburner)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/25 "2000-03-04T06:18:00Z")
everyone just skirts around my question…but it seems to intimidate you for some reason…its an honest question…can’t some of you guys answer it for me please…its not exactly a brainbuster i’m asking here…sheesh
* * *
_I’m as confused as a baby in a topless bar_
---
### Author:  [@MrKnowItAll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrKnowItAll)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/26 "2000-03-04T06:38:00Z")
Ya’know, Michael Masterson over in MPSIMS is putting up quite a few good contenders. Jayburner is going to have to try harder.
* * *
_Now with 1000 posts of pure wisdom!_
(or something)
---
### Author:  [@justwannano](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/justwannano)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/27 "2000-03-04T07:23:00Z")
How about:
If The Color Purple plays the blues will they turn red
---
### Author:  [@Poto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poto)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/28 "2000-03-04T12:54:00Z")
How does a thermos bottle know whether to keep the drink cold or hot?
---
### Author:  [@BuddyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuddyG)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/29 "2000-03-04T16:20:00Z")
I’ll see if the gas tank is empty,
ya’ gotta match?
---
### Author:  [@mega\_the\_roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mega_the_roo)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/30 "2000-03-04T16:28:00Z")
oh no, it definitly has to be one that my friend asked me when we were fifteen.
“if i dropped this candle in the water, would the whole lake start on fire?”
* * *
“If anybody wants a sheep, that is proof that he exists.”
---
### Author:  [@AzRaek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AzRaek)
#### Post date: [March 5, 2000, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/31 "2000-03-05T06:46:00Z")
“Don’t you love me anymore?”
* * *
I’m not a fallen angel, I’m a risen demon.
---
### Author:  [@Breckinshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Breckinshire)
#### Post date: [March 5, 2000, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/32 "2000-03-05T06:51:00Z")
“Is she prettier than me?”
OR
“Do these [pants] make my butt look big?”
Perhaps not the stupidest questions, but certainly the most dangerous. 😉
* * *
_A hush fell over the courtroom, killing six._
---
### Author:  [@justwannano](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/justwannano)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/33 "2000-03-04T19:09:00Z")
To son who came home late again
“Have you been drinking?”
---
### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/34 "2000-03-04T19:20:00Z")
Ask Michael Masterson\>
---
### Author:  [@SoMoMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SoMoMom)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/35 "2000-03-04T22:04:00Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Originally posted by rastahomie:
> \*\*
> The convenience store clerk looks at them and says, “You fellas goin’ to the game?”
>
> \*\*
A similar happened to my husband. He had a soccer referee clinic before a Blue’s game was going to be on. (He’s got this superstition that that they are winning on the road because he wears his Blues stuff while they play.) So, he’s all decked out in his authentic jersey and his brand new Blues hat with his fancy Blues hat pins. A fellow referee says, “You a Blues fan?”
---
### Author:  [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)
#### Post date: [March 4, 2000, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/36 "2000-03-04T22:59:00Z")
It was very hard to believe, but a who just came in to our tutoring business and scored a 1460 on a practice SAT had to have me explain the relationship of “locomotive” to “train” _and_ “tractor” to “plow.” It seemed she had just no idea of what a locomotive was, or a plow. I know we’re in a sprawling urban area, but puhleeze.
---
### Author:  [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)
#### Post date: [March 5, 2000, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/37 "2000-03-05T00:45:00Z")
Why do we park on the driveway and drive on the parkway?
* * *
Yours truly,
aha
---
### Author:  [@NanoByte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NanoByte)
#### Post date: [March 5, 2000, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/38 "2000-03-05T02:09:00Z")
Why are there gays on the Straight Dope MB?
What is the third name in this series: 1. John, 2. John Quincy 3. ?
If rain fell up, would we need clouds?
Why hasn’t this thread gone to MPSIMS yet?
Ans.: Because manhattan was waiting for **me** to post to it.
Ray (Moi?)
---
### Author:  [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)
#### Post date: [March 5, 2000, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/39 "2000-03-05T03:32:00Z")
Picture this. I’m in bed with my boyfriend, having wild sex, going at it hot and heavy. (OK, you don’t actually have to picture it if you don’t want.)
Suddenly, my father bursts in. What does he yell?
“What the hell are you doing???!!!”
Seems pretty obvious to me!
---
### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [March 5, 2000, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158/40 "2000-03-05T07:00:00Z")
Handy/Matt Mcl: You two have made me cry, from laughing so hard. Thank you, really.
I think the dumbest questions are the ones in which the person _knows_ the answer. It just irritates me to no end.
E.g. I sit down to eat a donut, and a cup of coffee. My friend says, “So, you’re having a cup of coffee with your donut?”
Or, I’m talking on the phone, and the person _sees_ me on the phone, and they still ask, “Oh, I’m sorry, are you using the phone?”
I’m sure you can all relate.
* * *
“Life is hard…but God is good”
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158.md?page=1)
[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-stupidest-question-ever-asked/8158.md?page=3)