# What's the worst movie you ever saw? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 24, 2018, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008 "2018-04-24T01:15:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2018, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/301 "2018-05-03T20:36:04Z")
“Bad movie” is all relative. Joe Versus the Volcano definitely stank… but we saw it in the theater knowing it was going to be bad, and therefor enjoyed it. We were really in the mood for something completely mindless. Plan 9 from Outer Space was arguably the most jacked-together, incoherent, inconsistent piece of dreck to make it to the big screen - but I saw it in college, knew what to expect, and had fun. Stranger Than Paradise, on the other hand… got fantastic reviews, and a friend and I went to see it. We sat through the whole thing because everyone else was laughing and we kept expecting that it would get funny at some point (spoiler: it didn’t). ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2018, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/302 "2018-05-03T20:44:28Z")
I liked Joe Vs the Volcano. It was quirky in a way that I appreciated. Worst movies I’ve ever seen in theaters: Hear No Evil with DB Sweeny and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. Full Fathom Five Crime Zone ---
**Author:** ![Dropo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Dropo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dropo)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2018, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/303 "2018-05-03T21:22:59Z")
_Upstream Color_ (2013) – Despite an intriguing beginning and concepts, this was generally senseless, obscure and tedious, a bad combination. I recall seeing interview highlights with the writer/director/star in which he admitted he had no idea what it was really about and had to have some friends come in and do some editing in order to “save” it. They shouldn’t have bothered. _The New World_ (2005) – Long, boring, thrill-less retelling of Pocahontas legend beautifully shot in Virginia has Colin Farrell and rest of cast standing around waiting for direction most of the time. _The Yin and the Yang of Mr. Go_ (1970) – Little known, little-seen cinematic atrocity of villainous Mr. Go (played by that respected interpreter of Asian roles, James Mason) undergoing sea-change of attitude thanks to the random intervention of the Buddha. Written and directed by The Penguin (Burgess Meredith) and “introducing Jeffrey Bridges” (his feature film debut). Godawful. ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/304 "2018-05-04T14:54:30Z")
> [@by-tor](#): > > Alien Resurrection is the worst movie I ever saw. I so wish I had walked out instead of watching it. It is disgusting and bad and disgustingly bad in many, many ways. I bought the Alien Quadrilogy DVD box set a while back. I was a huge fan of the first two movies, and had not seen the third or fourth ones. I figured the whole set, with bonus features, would be a nice treat. I watched the third one (penal colony setting), and it was pretty bad. Lame story and sucky SFX. I figured they must have learned their lesson and that the fourth one (Resurrection) would have to be better. Not only was it not better, it was a travesty. The whole concept was just terrible. It’s like if the Terminator franchise turned John Connor into an evil bad guy (oh, wait…). Anyway, I was so disgustingly disappointed with **Alien Resurrection** that I took the DVD out of the box set and threw it in the trash. I did not want it to contaminate the other DVDs in the set, just by being there. Terrible, terrible, TERRIBLE movie. ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/305 "2018-05-04T14:56:36Z")
> [@divemaster](#): > > I bought the Alien Quadrilogy DVD box set a while back. I was a huge fan of the first two movies, and had not seen the third or fourth ones. I figured the whole set, with bonus features, would be a nice treat. > > I watched the third one (penal colony setting), and it was pretty bad. Lame story and sucky SFX. > > I figured they must have learned their lesson and that the fourth one (Resurrection) would have to be better. > > Not only was it not better, it was a travesty. The whole concept was just terrible. It’s like if the Terminator franchise turned John Connor into an evil bad guy (oh, wait…). Anyway, I was so disgustingly disappointed with **Alien Resurrection** that I took the DVD out of the box set and threw it in the trash. I did not want it to contaminate the other DVDs in the set, just by being there. Terrible, terrible, TERRIBLE movie. Alien 4 was bad, but Alien 3 was a giant fuck-you to the fans so I hate it more. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/306 "2018-05-04T16:03:55Z")
> [@Dropo](#): > > _Upstream Color_ (2013) – Despite an intriguing beginning and concepts, this was generally senseless, obscure and tedious, a bad combination. I recall seeing interview highlights with the writer/director/star in which he admitted he had no idea what it was really about and had to have some friends come in and do some editing in order to “save” it. They shouldn’t have bothered. > > _The New World_ (2005) – Long, boring, thrill-less retelling of Pocahontas legend beautifully shot in Virginia has Colin Farrell and rest of cast standing around waiting for direction most of the time. > > _The Yin and the Yang of Mr. Go_ (1970) – Little known, little-seen cinematic atrocity of villainous Mr. Go (played by that respected interpreter of Asian roles, James Mason) undergoing sea-change of attitude thanks to the random intervention of the Buddha. Written and directed by The Penguin (Burgess Meredith) and “introducing Jeffrey Bridges” (his feature film debut). Godawful. I can’t decide whether I would expect someone with your username to list [Santa Claus Conquers the Martians](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058548/)in this thread or not - presumably you’ve seen it and lord knows it isn’t good, but also presumably you liked it enough to reference it. Incidentally, thank you for the mention of the Mr Go film, because it led me to the film poster which has [one of the most wonderfully horrible taglines](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Yin_and_the_Yang_of_Mr._Go#/media/File:Yinyango.jpg)I’ve ever seen for a film: > [@](#): > > …She was the first Oriental who wasn’t _INSCRUTABLE_! Racism, sexism and bad punnage in one neat little package. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/307 "2018-05-04T18:12:42Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > "B > > Stranger Than Paradise, on the other hand… got fantastic reviews, and a friend and I went to see it. We sat through the whole thing because everyone else was laughing and we kept expecting that it would get funny at some point (spoiler: it didn’t). From wiki: \*The first section is set in the bare Lower East Side apartment of Willie, who is forced to take in Eva, his 16-year-old cousin from Budapest, for ten days. The joke here is the basic joke of the whole movie. It’s in what Willie doesn’t do: he doesn’t offer her food or drink, or ask her any questions about life in Hungary or her trip; he doesn’t offer to show her the city, or even supply her with sheets for her bed. \* Yeah, what a HIlarious joke. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Dropo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Dropo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dropo)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/308 "2018-05-04T19:38:00Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > I can’t decide whether I would expect someone with your username to list [Santa Claus Conquers the Martians](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058548/)in this thread or not - presumably you’ve seen it and lord knows it isn’t good, but also presumably you liked it enough to reference it. [https://www.detroitathletic.com/blog/2014/07/25/dropos-amazing-12-hits-row-remain-baseball-record/](https://www.detroitathletic.com/blog/2014/07/25/dropos-amazing-12-hits-row-remain-baseball-record/) I saw\* SCCTM\* once, decades ago. Don’t remember it, have no fondness for it, and mildly regret my username as this is the second time I’ve had to explain this. Fortunately, I also have a well-developed sense of apathy about it which prevents me from caring too much. I have not actually seen all of it, but _La Nave de los Monstruos_, a.k.a. _Ship of Monsters_ (1959) certainly has a place in this thread. A choice clip should suffice: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/d8sZDHkGAqE/hqdefault.jpg "SHIP OF MONSTERS (LA NAVE DE LOS MONSTRUOS, 1959) exciting clip!") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8sZDHkGAqE) ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/309 "2018-05-04T20:11:45Z")
Last week I stumbled across the move _Explorers_. (If I had ever heard of it before I had forgotten about it, and definitely never saw it.) I wouldn’t likely say that it was _the_ worst movie I ever saw, but it is [somewhere up there on the list](https://www.thewrap.com/explorers-classic-river-phoenix-ethan-hawke-joe-dante/). ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/310 "2018-05-04T22:08:22Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > Plan 9 from Outer Space was arguably the most jacked-together, incoherent, inconsistent piece of dreck to make it to the big screen - but I saw it in college, knew what to expect, and had fun. Oho! There are plenty of MST3K movies that make\* Plan 9\* look like a cinematic masterpiece. Having a low budget doesn’t mean you can’t make a good movie (cf [Budd Boetticher](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budd_Boetticher)) but sometimes the reason you can’t get anyone to give you money to make your movie is because you have no talent. MST3K is a master at finding these polished turds. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/311 "2018-05-04T22:19:36Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > Oho! There are plenty of MST3K movies that make\* Plan 9\* look like a cinematic masterpiece. Having a low budget doesn’t mean you can’t make a good movie (cf [Budd Boetticher](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budd_Boetticher)) but sometimes the reason you can’t get anyone to give you money to make your movie is because you have no talent. MST3K is a master at finding these polished turds. \*Dark Star \*is, IMHO the finest film, dollar for dollar ever made. Even tho it is a little cheezy at times. ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/312 "2018-05-04T22:31:16Z")
The first Star Trek movie and the first Phantom whatever Star Wars movie (after the ewoks; why did I go?) were really bad. I went to sleep in both of them. I had to get up and sit in the lobby while Clueless was on. I preferred just sitting there and thinking about carpet lint (Wife was inside). ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2018, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/313 "2018-05-04T22:59:00Z")
Just thought of another: _Yellowbeard_. More great comic actors than any other move: Graham Chapman, Peter Boyle, Cheech Marin, Tommy Chong, Peter Cook, Marty Feldman, Eric Idle, Madeline Kahn, John Cleese, Kenneth Mars, Spike Milligan, plus James Mason, Susanna York, and even David Bowie. Script by Chapman and Cook. Not a single laugh in the entire 96 minutes. Pretty impressive, really. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2018, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/314 "2018-05-06T03:24:44Z")
Several months ago, I got “Oh, Calcutta!” from Netflix. After about 15 minutes, I said, “Oh, hell, no” and shut it off. ---
**Author:** ![Doubticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e56c9b/32.png) [@Doubticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doubticus)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/315 "2018-05-07T17:21:22Z")
I sure I’ve seen plenty of terrible movies in my time, but the two standouts are “Raw Deal” and “Superman III”. As a kid of the 80’s I enjoyed most of Arnold’s B-action movies, but “Raw Deal” had no likable characters or a plot worth paying attention to. I like Superman and Richard Pryor, but who thought putting them in the same movie made any sense at all? ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2018, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/316 "2018-05-07T17:52:54Z")
> [@Doubticus](#): > > I sure I’ve seen plenty of terrible movies in my time, but the two standouts are “Raw Deal” and “Superman III”. As a kid of the 80’s I enjoyed most of Arnold’s B-action movies, but “Raw Deal” had no likable characters or a plot worth paying attention to. I like Superman and Richard Pryor, but who thought putting them in the same movie made any sense at all? Movie executives. They’re not guided by any sense of artistic integrity or even logic or consistency. They’re guided by profit, and Richard Pryor was a hot property at the time, as was Superman. In their minds, it was the ideal situation. That the movie was abysmal isn’t relevant. It cost an estimated $39M to make, and made back a third of that in the opening weekend, eventually grossing $60M domestic. So it was profitable, even without counting overseas, video sales, and broadcast rights. What more would they want? You’d think dilution of the brand would factor into it somewhere, reducing profits for Superman IV and spinoffs like Supergirl, but apparently not. (I note that the movies decreased geometrically or even exponentially in quality as you went from I to IV and Supergirl) ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/317 "2018-05-08T17:26:19Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > “Bad movie” is all relative. > > Joe Versus the Volcano definitely stank… but we saw it in the theater knowing it was going to be bad, and therefor enjoyed it. We were really in the mood for something completely mindless. > > Plan 9 from Outer Space was arguably the most jacked-together, incoherent, inconsistent piece of dreck to make it to the big screen - but I saw it in college, knew what to expect, and had fun. > > Stranger Than Paradise, on the other hand… got fantastic reviews, and a friend and I went to see it. We sat through the whole thing because everyone else was laughing and we kept expecting that it would get funny at some point (spoiler: it didn’t). I fully agree: There’s different levels of bad and expectation matters. I want to add something, though: Some kinds of film simply _won’t_ be bad in some ways. Modern Hollywood films _will_ have synchronized audio, for example. There’s a certain floor their technical quality won’t sink below, simply because there are too many technicians working on the project who, while they can’t fix bad dialogue, can fix the digital media files to ensure that dialogue comes through correctly. So you have to go out into the wide world if you want to see films which are bad on multiple axes at once. Compare _Plan 9_ to _Manos_: _Plan 9_’s the product of a filmmaker. _Manos_ was the product of a fertilizer salesman. Therefore, while _Plan 9_’s plot is idiotic, it at least jolts along at a reasonable pace, whereas _Manos_’s plot stops dead while people drive around looking at nothing for an extended sequence which exists for absolutely no comprehensible reason. Ed Wood knew how to tell a story, and how to _keep telling it_ without nodding off partway through or something. Some problems aren’t the film’s fault, which is also related to budget and how close to the mainstream the film was. _Plan 9_ was always preserved, so the good copy is what everyone’s seen. _Manos_ was just about buried until a rather poor-quality copy was revived and spread around, giving people an unfair impression of the cinematography involved. Happily, [_Manos_ has since been restored](http://www.manosinhd.com/why-im-saving-manos-the-hands-of-fate/), so now we can finally see Hal Warren’s _oeuvre_ as it was intended to be seen: [del]In the back of a manure truck, attracting flies[/del] As a black-and-white film of reasonable image quality. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/318 "2018-05-08T17:40:29Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Just thought of another: _Yellowbeard_. More great comic actors than any other move: Graham Chapman, Peter Boyle, Cheech Marin, Tommy Chong, Peter Cook, Marty Feldman, Eric Idle, Madeline Kahn, John Cleese, Kenneth Mars, Spike Milligan, plus James Mason, Susanna York, and even David Bowie. Script by Chapman and Cook. > > Not a single laugh in the entire 96 minutes. Pretty impressive, really. What? _WHAT???_ ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/319 "2018-05-08T17:45:37Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Just thought of another: _Yellowbeard_. More great comic actors than any other move: Graham Chapman, Peter Boyle, Cheech Marin, Tommy Chong, Peter Cook, Marty Feldman, Eric Idle, Madeline Kahn, John Cleese, Kenneth Mars, Spike Milligan, plus James Mason, Susanna York, and even David Bowie. Script by Chapman and Cook. > > Not a single laugh in the entire 96 minutes. Pretty impressive, really. It had some moments, but yeah, I expected greatness and got WTF? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2018, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008/320 "2018-05-08T18:06:24Z")
Not the worst, but _Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil_ was incredibly boring. I had some petty high expectations, but couldn’t wait for that turd to wrap up. Total snooze-fest. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008.md?page=15) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-the-worst-movie-you-ever-saw/813008.md?page=17)