# What's up with men who urinate all over toilet seats? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [February 4, 2005, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286 "2005-02-04T00:58:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/21 "2005-02-04T03:14:25Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > It is a Well Established Fact that men are not allowed to use adjacent urinals. If there is a row of three, it can at maximum accomodate to users - one at either end. If some inconsiderate prick decided to use the middle one, he is blocking the use of either alternative urinal. In the same manner, if there are four urinals on the wall, there can be a maximum of 2 users at any given time. The rules are quite similar for the use of stalls. That’s right. There is even an [online test](http://flasharcade.com/game.php?urinal&1) for your urinal etiquette. I you don’t do well, it means that you are a sociopath or a woman or something. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/22 "2005-02-04T03:21:54Z")
> [@beerbaron](#): > > If one is bashful of using the urinal, and their aim is so poor, why don’t they just sit down when they use the stall? Because someone else has already peed on it of course, and if they’re not going to clean up their own urine, they sure as hell aren’t going to clean up someone elses. > [@](#): > > Are you saying that posessed with a sudden urge to defecate they would crap their pants rather than sit down in a public stall? None of this makes any sense to me. I still tend to buy into the sociopath explanation… Well, it’s pretty rare to get a sudden urge to defectae. Normally you can hold it in for a considerable time till you get to a safe toilet, either at work or at home. But if you really have to go then sitting on a toilet seat would be the lesser evil from of that and pooing your pants. ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/23 "2005-02-04T03:45:33Z")
Also, true germophobes should be aware that the average office desk has more germs than the average toilet seat, yet I don’t see people avoiding contact with office desks. This all seems like the result of some psychological illness or just plain boorishness than anything related to common sense. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/24 "2005-02-04T03:50:45Z")
We’re not really talking about a true germaphobe though, just people who don’t clean up in public toilets because it is icky. Also, there is not point washing your hands after going to a public toilet unless you can get out of there without having to touch the door handle. ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/25 "2005-02-04T03:55:49Z")
I use the old “one last paper towel for the doorhande” trick. (Don’t like germs myself, but am not irrational about it) ---
**Author:** ![Blalron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Blalron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blalron)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/26 "2005-02-04T04:13:12Z")
> [@1920s Style "Death Ray"](#): > > Well, it’s pretty rare to get a sudden urge to defectae. Normally you can hold it in for a considerable time till you get to a safe toilet, either at work or at home. But if you really have to go then sitting on a toilet seat would be the lesser evil from of that and pooing your pants. I’d hardly call it a rare thing. Ever heard of diarrhea? ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/27 "2005-02-04T04:55:57Z")
> [@Blalron](#): > > I’d hardly call it a rare thing. Ever heard of diarrhea? Yes, I get it rarely and assume other people do too. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/28 "2005-02-04T05:00:59Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > That’s right. There is even an > [online test](http://flasharcade.com/game.php?urinal&1) for your urinal etiquette. I you don’t do well, it means that you are a sociopath or a woman or something. My friend Mark said that he saw a woman totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window. I heard that there was this woman who was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon the woman killed the whole town. ---
**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/29 "2005-02-04T06:03:33Z")
> [@spingears](#): > > What’s up with men who urinate all over toilet seats? > > 1. Poor or non-existent aim, may be blind. - And we’re not talking about sight here either :rolleyes: LOL… I dunno I’m just enjoying this thread too much… the Aussie a few posts back that was negotiating streams… “hmm, which is the LAR-jeh quantity” hahaha… dammmn guys… I personally take huge wads of paper so that none will soak through to my hands and wipe everything dry and it’s a balancing act from there, sitting on enough of my pants to both sit and s\*it haha… sometimes, you get lucky and the seat’s dry and they have those gay-ass toilet seat covers that you have to tear the middle out of before you can do anything with 'em … I’ve been sitting "cautious for so long it’s damn weird to fully sit on a seat (toilet seat propolactic installed of course :rolleyes: )… I personally can figure the urine out, much like many of you guys already did… but when it’s # 2 and all over as if bending over caused all of nature to spontaneously combust…we’re talking about “car bomb magnitude” here, lol… Ya gotta, laugh and wonder wtf at the same time… hahaha… some fo these people just have problems… LOL… one certificate short in “Penile Engineering” or what have you… haha ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/30 "2005-02-04T07:07:16Z")
> [@cheddarsnax](#): > > You’d think after a while they would correct for this. Or maybe pull back the skin (if this is not possible, see a doctor). Not entirely related, but IIRC, pulling back the foreskin is not possible for young boys. I think they have to be around 10-12 years old before the foreskin can be fully retracted. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/31 "2005-02-04T12:12:57Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > My friend Mark said that he saw a woman totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window. I heard that there was this woman who was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon the woman killed the whole town. That sounds cool. And by cool, I mean toatally sweet. ---
**Author:** ![InvidiousCourgette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@InvidiousCourgette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InvidiousCourgette)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/32 "2005-02-04T12:25:36Z")
What are you, some kind of mammal? ---
**Author:** ![scm1001](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@scm1001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scm1001)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/33 "2005-02-04T12:53:04Z")
> [@1920s Style "Death Ray"](#): > > Not to mention that sometimes the eye of the penis may be stuck together in the middle (with various bodily fluids generally) this can strike circumsized and uncircumsized men and causes the stream to split. It is normally only possible to get one of the streams into the bowl, for those without the bladder control required to stop midstream, a quick decision must be made about which stream contains the most urine. I second this one being a chronic sufferer. Always having to wipe up all sorts of surfaces after a visit. I will have to set up a support group. hmmm need a catchy name! ---
**Author:** ![Arwin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/51bf81/32.png) [@Arwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arwin)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/34 "2005-02-04T12:53:18Z")
> [@beerbaron](#): > > Why don’t they use the urinals? Or at least put up the seat? Are they sociopaths? Germophobes? I just don’t get the motivation behind this disgusting and VERY common phenomea. I just returned from a restroom with four sit down stalls and three of them were thus “decorated”. Although I am an agnostic who leans to atheism, I cannot help but hope that there is a specially hot corner in hell for these folks. Assholes, I call them. It’s a condition that coincides with drunkenness suspiciously often. In this case, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was just one guy, saving one third of his bladder for each seat, and running out for the fourth. He probably drank some water right after to return again in fifteen minutes to finish the job. Where was this, by the way? ---
**Author:** ![Sinusoidal\_Saurus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/71e660/32.png) [@Sinusoidal\_Saurus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sinusoidal_Saurus)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/35 "2005-02-04T13:33:51Z")
Personally, I’d like to understand the anatomical challenges of the woman in my office building who manages to spray urine on the back curve of the seat only, and also on the vertical pipe at the back. I think she’s got to be standing up and facing the toilet, that’s the only thing I can figure. Most of the drips you see in women’s bathrooms are on the front edge, with a few on the sides. Which means…perhaps we have a man visiting our restroom? M. ---
**Author:** ![jester21](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ed655f/32.png) [@jester21](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jester21)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/36 "2005-02-04T13:57:18Z")
I work at Wally World. I work on Overnight Maintenance. This means, once or twice a week, i have to clean the bathrooms. Which means, i get to see some really disgusting shit. (literally and figuratively) I suspect, most of the vandals are in fact employees. The probably do it becuz 1. they think it’s funny. 2. to piss off thier fellow co-workers. 3. to show thier dissatifaction with thier job/bosses w/ little or no regard to thier fellow co-workers. But what is even worse, are the sick lazy bastards who take a shit and then don’t flush. :mad: And a final note of disgust, the WORST and most disgusting messes i’ve found, have been in the WOMEN’S bathrooms :eek: ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/37 "2005-02-04T15:47:20Z")
It’s simple: guys piss all over the toilet seat because it’s in front of the wall. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/38 "2005-02-04T15:51:38Z")
I’m surprised no one’s said this yet, but _women do it, too_. Not all, just the ones with bad habits. And it’s more of a spray. I’m not sure if they’re hovering, or what, _but don’t do it_, or at least clean up after yourselves. And I \*know \* urine is (mostly) sterile. I \*know \* I have to do some pretty amazing contortions to get any into an orifice. But it’s still **gross**. _does the icky dance_ ---
**Author:** ![rburget](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rburget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rburget)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/39 "2005-02-04T19:01:08Z")
Sometimes the industrial-strength flushing action of public toilets will cause water to splash up unto the seats. ---
**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/40 "2005-02-04T20:56:49Z")
I suspect the most qualified to answer such questions are restraining themselves right now… and yes, truth be told… women have some sloppy lookin’ bathrooms… with the whole “Man-Pig” title that men inherit when something dangles between their legs at birth it’s not so much a shock if a man is a slob… but the “clean and neat” title that women have, bring you to a whole new realization of sanitary habits if you are ever so cursed to hold a position like this and yes women come in germophobe categories as well and they don’t fully sit on the seat… “hover” I believe was the word? haha… bingo you’ve got yourself some “stained-on steel” … and the wall and the back of the seat and the sides of the toilet that pool together… as I said previously … I know no natural phenomenon that would justify the #2 cover toilet though… I mean even if you don’t aim and you’ve been holding it back for hours… as if they’re thinking “well, I made it into the stall, what do you want from me?”… the size of it… the coverage factor… Awh… gees… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286.md?page=3)