# What's up with men who urinate all over toilet seats?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [February 4, 2005, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286 "2005-02-04T00:58:31Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\
**Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/61 "2005-02-06T22:30:24Z")

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MY toilet! MY restroom! MINE! 😛

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/62 "2005-02-07T02:42:06Z")

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> [@The Great Zamboni](#):
>
> This may cause distortion of the pee canal…

That would be the technical term for this huh? hahahaha… you folks are really taking this thread seriously, huh? :rolleyes: …I think it’s safe to say that even if the discussion makes us feel better, it’s probably not going to solve any wide-spread pee stream dilemmas . :dubious: … I guess the positive every guy can see here is if they have a penis they’re instant experts 🙂

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**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/63 "2005-02-07T13:06:05Z")

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> [@Thinktank](#):
>
> That would be the technical term for this huh? hahahaha… you folks are really taking this thread seriously, huh?

Of course there is a technical term for it. I give you the male [Urethra](http://www.bartleby.com/107/Images/large/image1142.gif). ( Link is an illustration of bladder, and penis- anatomy book stuff, but possibly not work-safe )

Yes we take this thread seriously. We take our collective penii seriously.

Don’t you?

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/64 "2005-02-07T21:43:19Z")

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Well, only when I’m seranading it with sweet, tender music or jumping a fence normally… he’s a big boy now- he takes care of himself for the most part :rolleyes: lol

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**Author:** ![Glassy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@Glassy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Glassy)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/65 "2005-02-08T03:55:52Z")

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> [@Chronos](#):
>
> A man can typically interrupt the stream for a few seconds, but I would not trust myself to change position so drastically while doing so. When a man stands to pee, he generally passes his penis through the fly of his underpants. To sit down, though, one pulls the underpants down to the knees or ankles. Changing positions, then, would require unbuttoning the pants fly, passing the penis back into the underpants fly, lowering both garments, and turning around.

Thank you for this very clear descriptive explanation.

I see that I did not think the matter through when I suggested that a man sit down to contain the split-stream phenomenon. What I was picturing in my head was not that he (our hypothetical urinator) turn 180 degrees, lower his pants, and then sit down. I was picturing him just instantly sitting down without turning around, straddling the toilet and facing the wall. But I’d forgotten about his pants. I now realize that his clothes would get in the way.

I retract my poor suggestion. This having-a-penis business is alien to me.

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**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/66 "2005-02-08T07:20:08Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Yes we take this thread seriously. We take our collective penii seriously.

Nitpick: The plural is “penes”. Unless, of course, you prefer the standard English plural, “penises”, but where’s the fun in that? In general, Latin words ending in -us become -i (e.g., “phallus”, “phalli”), words ending in -um become -a (e.g., “bacterium”, “bacteria”), -a (singular) becomes -ae (“vagina”, “vaginae”), and most other endings become -es (though it can sometimes be difficult to tell exactly what the root is, for those). The -us words are masculine, -um words are neuter, -a words are feminine, and the others can be anything.

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**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/67 "2005-02-08T08:08:36Z")

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> [@Huerta88](#):
>
> As a former janitor I will vouch for the fact that we thought the women’s rooms were worse – and it is not just because of the carelessly-discarded feminine products and dirty diapers often left behind, although those aren’t pleasant either.

I will back that up, also having done cleaning as part of my job. Even allowing for feminine hygeine products, the women’s toilets were a pigsty. The only thing the men’s toilets were worse for was that “tomcat” smell, but if that was present it was more due to lax cleaning than the men themselves. A properly cleaned toilet, cleaned at least daily, will not have it.

> [@](#):
>
> Apparently little boys are not too bright about lifting up the toilet seat when they’re in a hurry.

Little boys are none too bright about lots of things in this regard. In fact, when I started my young fella at kindrgarten in '03, we went to an orientation day in late '02. When the kids were off playing in the class of their next year’s teacher, the parents were taken aside for a meeting and briefing. One of the things we were asked was “please, please please get a male family member to show your son how to use a urinal properly, as some boys have some very strange ideas”. This would translate to use of a normal toilet too, as I know that some boys (especially in mostly female households) don’t even know they’re supposed to stand up.

> [@](#):
>
> I was always uncomprehending when I started hearing the stupid debate about men irritating women by leaving the toilet seat up

I’m uncomprehending about the entire debate, to be honest. The seat should always be DOWN, for the simple reason that the _lid_ should always be down.

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**Author:** ![scm1001](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@scm1001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scm1001)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/68 "2005-02-08T10:06:24Z")

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> [@Jenaroph](#):
>
> Split Pee Group?

Good try, though on reflection I prefer SPRAYS - the Society for the Prevention of  
Randomly Aimed Yellow Streams

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/69 "2005-02-08T19:36:31Z")

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Sorry, I have to disagree… “split pee” is simpler and thus funnier and more universally understood… I suppose it all depends if you want to genuinely form this organiztion or if it’s something “just for thought/humor” … however, I’m guessing to tell someone what organization you are part of in real life “Split Pee” (which sounds like “split pea”) Vs “SPRAYS”

… which one do you think the recipient is going to “figure it out” with just a name? :rolleyes:

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**Author:** ![grayhairedmomma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/47e85d/32.png) [@grayhairedmomma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grayhairedmomma)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/70 "2005-02-08T20:07:32Z")

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> [@TheLoadedDog](#):
>
> This would translate to use of a normal toilet too, as I know that some boys (especially in mostly female households) don’t even know they’re supposed to stand up.

What’s so bad about them sitting down all they time? Mens room shave both urinals and stalls.

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**Author:** ![ltfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@ltfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ltfire)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/71 "2005-02-08T21:41:04Z")

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Quote:  
Originally Posted by TheLoadedDog  
This would translate to use of a normal toilet too, as I know that some boys (especially in mostly female households) don’t even know they’re supposed to stand up.

Just a little off track, but, this reminds me of a good friend who was the only boy (Dad had died) raised in a family with Mom and six sisters. It wasn’t until he was taking a shower in high school gym, that it was pointed out to him…amidst much laughter…that he didn’t have his towel around his waist, but, like a woman, attached under his armpits. Growing up, that’s what everyone else did in his family. Seemed normal to him.  
😃

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**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/72 "2005-02-08T22:02:48Z")

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> [@mornea](#):
>
> What’s so bad about them sitting down all they time? Mens room shave both urinals and stalls.

Nothing inherently _bad_ about it, except that it will lead to teasing from other boys if they get caught doing so, and that the ability to pee standing up is one of the coolest things about being a guy - why expose your arse to a dirty public toilet seat when you don’t have to? Another cool thing about being a guy is there is usually no queue for the urinal. If everyone started doing this…

**ltfire** , a cousin of mine, at about age five, accidently walked in on his grandmother as she was sitting on the toilet. Shocked, he asked her, “do ladies use the toilet too?”

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**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/73 "2005-02-08T22:19:43Z")

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> [@Chronos](#):
>
> Nitpick: The plural is “penes”. Unless, of course, you prefer the standard English plural, “penises”, but where’s the fun in that? In general, Latin words ending in -us become -i (e.g., “phallus”, “phalli”), words ending in -um become -a (e.g., “bacterium”, “bacteria”), -a (singular) becomes -ae (“vagina”, “vaginae”), and most other endings become -es (though it can sometimes be difficult to tell exactly what the root is, for those). The -us words are masculine, -um words are neuter, -a words are feminine, and the others can be anything.

Oh.  
:smack:

Thank you. Don’t you feel, though, that \*\* Collective Penii\*\* is an excellent band name?

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/74 "2005-02-08T23:45:51Z")

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> [@Cartooniverse](#):
>
> Oh.  
> :smack:
> 
> Thank you. Don’t you feel, though, that \*\* Collective Penii\*\* is an excellent band name?

😃 Sure, it’s got a nice ring to it,lol

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/75 "2005-02-09T01:40:03Z")

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> [@Cartooniverse](#):
>
> Oh.  
> :smack:
> 
> Thank you. Don’t you feel, though, that \*\* Collective Penii\*\* is an excellent band name?

😃 Sure, it’s got a nice ring to it, lol

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/76 "2005-02-09T01:41:17Z")

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:eek: double-post!!! forgiveness please… 😢

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**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/77 "2005-02-09T02:07:36Z")

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Hey, that means it has twice the ring it had before !!

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/78 "2005-02-09T02:12:26Z")

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😉 I’m sure that’s it

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**Author:** ![Thinktank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Thinktank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thinktank)\
**Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/80 "2005-02-09T02:33:25Z")

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yeah, but never on Sunday :rolleyes: ba-dum-dump…

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**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Zamboni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@The\_Great\_Zamboni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Zamboni)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2005, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-up-with-men-who-urinate-all-over-toilet-seats/288286/81 "2005-02-11T04:27:45Z")

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> [@TheLoadedDog](#):
>
> I’m uncomprehending about the entire debate, to be honest. The seat should always be DOWN, for the simple reason that the _lid_ should always be down.

Absolutely true. You want to keep the microspray from the flush away from your toothbrush.

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