# What's wrong with Dan Brown's writings? (Example provided) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 22, 2006, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737 "2006-04-22T09:53:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crowbar_of_Irony_3)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/1 "2006-04-22T09:53:04Z")
Hi all, In order not to hijack this [particular thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=367765), I decided to start a new one. I am very curious about Marley23’s post, which is fifth in the thread. > [@Marley23](#): > > Allow me to offer some sentences from The Da Vinci Code as evidence that he can’t write for shit. > > “As he moved toward the mist of the fountains, Langdon had the uneasy sense he was crossing an imaginary threshold into another world.” [page 19] > > “His artwork seemed bursting to tell a secret, and yet whatever it was remained hidden, perhaps beneath a layer of paint, perhaps enciphered in plain view, or perhaps nowhere at all. Maybe Da Vinci’s plethora of tantalizing clues was nothing but an empty promise left behind to frustrate the curious and bring a smirk to the face of his knowing Mona Lisa.” [170] > > “Finally, Langdon offered some of his own research- a series of symbologic connections that strongly supported the seemingly controversial claims.” [217] I have to say that I am not a native speaker of the English language, and it has been a long time since I have attended any formal English classes, and I have never been to a writer’s workshop, or training of the likes. The question is: Just what’s wrong with the examples provided? I’m just not sure, or catching it. Thanks in advanced! ---
**Author:** ![Trillionaire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@Trillionaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trillionaire)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/2 "2006-04-22T10:05:18Z")
I’m sure **Marley23** will be along shortly, but in the meantime [here’s](http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000844.html) an article briefly explaining why certain aspects of Dan Brown’s writing are so terrible. ---
**Author:** ![FlyingRamenMonster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@FlyingRamenMonster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyingRamenMonster)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/3 "2006-04-22T14:12:41Z")
I can’t tell you why, but I agree there is something seriously wrong with those sentences, as evidenced by the way I burst out laughing at them. They remind me of [this](http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/). ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/4 "2006-04-22T14:46:17Z")
Admittedly I’ve only read ‘The DaVinci Code’, but his characters are silly and his plots are even more silly. I can understand why some people like American Idol, but I can’t understand why people were able to read ‘The DaVinci Code’ and actually think it was a good (or even worse, “deep” - gah!) book. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/5 "2006-04-22T14:53:28Z")
> [@Trillionaire](#): > > I’m sure **Marley23** will be along shortly, but in the meantime [here’s](http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000844.html) an article briefly explaining why certain aspects of Dan Brown’s writing are so terrible. My reaction was pretty much in line with the linked blogger’s. Almost every single sentence just hit me wrong; amateurish, first-drafty, clumsy. One of the worst written books I personally have ever read. ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/6 "2006-04-22T16:45:50Z")
I’m a very lenient reader on a lot of things, but his dialog is painfully stilted and doesn’t in any way sound like stuff real people would say. I enjoyed TDC well enough for the mystery, but after reading it, I never considered buying another one of his books. That blogger gave me a great idea. I should take a page or two of his book and just critique it, just as I would for someone on [CritiqueCircle.com](http://CritiqueCircle.com). ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/7 "2006-04-22T17:06:35Z")
Aww, I’ve inspired a thread! Crap, it’s about Dan Brown! > [@lissener](#): > > Almost every single sentence just hit me wrong; amateurish, first-drafty, clumsy. If you want my short answer, **ExtraKun** that’s it. “Clumsy” is the word I use most often to explain why I hate his writing so much. The examples I provided might not stick out to a non-native speaker of English. They aren’t grammatically wrong. They are just unartistic. The linked article does sum it up pretty well. I have told many people “when a book begins with the words ‘Renowned curator,’ you know it’s going to be terrible.” I’ll break down my examples a little bit. > [@](#): > > “As he moved toward the mist of the fountains, Langdon had the uneasy sense he was crossing an imaginary threshold into another world.” Logic problem: If Langdon is crossing an imaginary threshold, how is he going into another world? And since it’s an “uneasy sense,” it sounds like he’s not even sure he’s crossing the “imaginary threshold” into the world that might not exist. In many places in the book, Brown gets a pattern like “[adjective noun] of the [adjective noun] to [adjective noun].” This is an example, and whenever he does it, the adjectives feel superfluous. The sentence works just fine without “uneasy” and “imaginary.” > [@](#): > > “His artwork seemed bursting to tell a secret, and yet whatever it was remained hidden, perhaps beneath a layer of paint, perhaps enciphered in plain view, or perhaps nowhere at all. Maybe Da Vinci’s plethora of tantalizing clues was nothing but an empty promise left behind to frustrate the curious and bring a smirk to the face of his knowing Mona Lisa.” Again, Brown gets himself into a logical problem and doesn’t know how to get out of it. So he tries to wave it away with ugly, stuffed sentences. The secret “seems” to exist - but maybe it’s hidden, or in plain view. Or maybe it doesn’t exist. A secret either exists or doesn’t; it’s either hidden or in plain view (although maybe it’s not a secret then). Those are all the options and they don’t all need to be stated. And the sentence is ugly. Brown is trying to create a mysterious, confusing feel with this bit, but I think he confused himself. How can a “plethora of tantalizing clues” [adjective noun] exist if, as he goes on to say, there’s no secret and it’s just an empty promise? Why even suggest it’s an empty promise? He’s trying to make the passage sound contradictory and intriguing, building up to the bit about the painting’s smile, but it doesn’t work. It’s a _non sequitur_. > [@](#): > > “Finally, Langdon offered some of his own research- a series of symbologic connections that strongly supported the seemingly controversial claims.” Symbologic connections strongly supported seemingly controversial claims? Yuck. And symbologic isn’t really the word he wants, although he uses it throughout the book. The other two sentences were attempts at art, this isn’t. I just think it’s very ugly. The two straight adverb+noun combinations are the opposite of music to my ears. And how can something “seem” controversial? It’s controversial or it’s not. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/8 "2006-04-22T17:08:11Z")
> [@](#): > > “As he moved toward the mist of the fountains, Langdon had the uneasy sense he was crossing an imaginary threshold into another world.” Nothing particularly wrong with this one. It’s grammatical, certainly. “imaginary threshold” is a bit a a jarring – I’d drop “immaginary” or replace “another” with it. > [@](#): > > “His artwork seemed bursting to tell a secret, and yet whatever it was remained hidden, perhaps beneath a layer of paint, perhaps enciphered in plain view, or perhaps nowhere at all. Maybe Da Vinci’s plethora of tantalizing clues was nothing but an empty promise left behind to frustrate the curious and bring a smirk to the face of his knowing Mona Lisa.” Needs a bit of editing. “whatever it was remained” is awkward, and I’d put a colon after “hidden” Second sentence is overly wordy. “plethora of tantalizing clues” needs to be cut down, and I’d drop “knowing.” > [@](#): > > “Finally, Langdon offered some of his own research- a series of symbologic connections that strongly supported the seemingly controversial claims.” “symbologic” is an awkward portmanteau of “symbolic logic”; I’m not even sure it’s a word. “seemingly” should be cut, and “controversial” is (probably – I’d have to see the context) countersinking the idea. But, ultimately, this exercise is pointless and silly. Dan Brown is not a successful writer because he is a glorious prose stylist (I’d argue that being a glorious prose stylist might get you critical praise, but it isn’t going to give you success). Dan Brown is successful because of his ability to write an intriguing plot that makes the reader wants to read more (which is, of course, the goal of all good writing\*). If you’re good enough at one of the many skills a writer needs, flaws in the other skills don’t matter. The ability to plot like Brown is not trivial (if you think it is, try it sometime). If his prose is clunky, it just means he’s better in other aspects of writing so that his flaws aren’t important. \*No, I’m not saying all good writing is plot driven. You can make people want to read more in many ways: the well-turned phrase, the perfect image, the narrative hook, the compelling characters. Ideally, you want all these and more, but you need to do _something_ that will cause your readers to turn to the next page. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/9 "2006-04-22T17:13:43Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > “symbologic” is an awkward portmanteau of “symbolic logic”; I’m not even sure it’s a word. It doesn’t turn up at [dictionary.com](http://dictionary.com). “Symboligical” does. Brown often calls Langdon a “symbologist” when the study of symbols is really called semiotics. I guess he didn’t want his readers to wonder even for a second what Langdon does for a living? I think that error adds a patina of amateurishness to his book. What you say about Brown’s ability to plot is true, and I didn’t ignore that in the other thread. But when I say he can’t write, this is what I’m talking about. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/10 "2006-04-22T17:36:40Z")
“Symbology” has nothing to do with symbolic logic. Brown means “semiotics” but doesn’t want his readers to have to go to the dictionary ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/11 "2006-04-22T18:02:54Z")
El Guapo: “Jefe, would you say I have a plethora of tantalizing clues?” Jefe: “Yes, El Guapo. You have a plethora.” El Guapo: “Jefe, what is a plethora?” ---
**Author:** ![Mrs\_O\_Malley\_s\_Cow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Mrs\_O\_Malley\_s\_Cow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs_O_Malley_s_Cow)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/12 "2006-04-22T18:03:33Z")
> [@Larry Borgia](#): > > “Symbology” has nothing to do with symbolic logic. Brown means “semiotics” but doesn’t want his readers to have to go to the dictionary He thinks his readers are too stupid to know what semiotics is. I have not read the book but am familiar (I would say a little too familiar) with the theories he presents. That aside, I have heard several people say the book is poorly written and is patronizing. ---
**Author:** ![Mrs\_O\_Malley\_s\_Cow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Mrs\_O\_Malley\_s\_Cow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs_O_Malley_s_Cow)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/13 "2006-04-22T18:04:35Z")
> [@Mrs O'Malley's Cow](#): > > He thinks his readers are too stupid to know what semiotics is. I have not read the book but am familiar (I would say a little too familiar) with the theories he presents. That aside, I have heard several people say the book is poorly written and is patronizing. Oh and I am going to the movie. If anything, it will be visually stunning. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/14 "2006-04-22T18:05:13Z")
Oops. **Marley** , I didn’t read your post #9 before I posted. Sorry about the redundancy. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/15 "2006-04-22T18:49:01Z")
> [@Mrs O'Malley's Cow](#): > > Oh and I am going to the movie. If anything, it will be visually stunning. And, hopefully, well-acted. They really did assemble a hell of a cat, IMHO. (How can you _not_ leave in a typo like that?) ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/16 "2006-04-22T19:38:23Z")
I haven’t ever read any Dan Brown, but the problem I’m seeing with those excerpts is that Brown seems to be telling his readers how they’re supposed to feel, as opposed to evoking those feelings in them. The bit about the painting: he says the clues are “tantalizing.” Better to show the clues, and describe them in such a way that the reader feels tantalized all by himself. Mind, I don’t have the context for that quote, so maybe he does that, too, but even then, coming out and saying the clues were tantalizing is a redundancy that makes it appear that Brown doesn’t trust either his audience or his own writing ability to get the point across on its own. That last sentence, the one about to “symbologic connections” is the worst. Again, I don’t have the context for that, but I don’t see any reason for it to exsist. Either that sentence is going to be followed by a description/monologue in which the character lays out his connections (making the sentence superfluous) or he just drops that sentence in there with further elaboration, which is simply lazy. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/17 "2006-04-22T19:46:22Z")
> [@Gozu Tashoya](#): > > And, hopefully, well-acted. They really did assemble a hell of a cat, IMHO. > > (How can you _not_ leave in a typo like that?) Because you wanted to avoid giving those of us who had planned to ignore the movie a reason to see it, just to see the Frankencat? ---
**Author:** ![baronsabato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed655f/32.png) [@baronsabato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/baronsabato)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/18 "2006-04-22T21:04:16Z")
> [@Mrs O'Malley's Cow](#): > > He thinks his readers are too stupid to know what semiotics is. I have not read the book but am familiar (I would say a little too familiar) with the theories he presents. That aside, I have heard several people say the book is poorly written and is patronizing. This [Wikipedia Article](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symbology) supports the idea that “symbology” is definitely a non-existent study, proving my ex-high school English teacher (who loved “The Da Vinci Code” and claimed that symbology is a field different from semiotics or semiology) wrong. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/19 "2006-04-22T21:14:15Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Dan Brown is successful because of his ability to write an intriguing plot that makes the reader wants to read more (which is, of course, the goal of all good writing\*). If you’re good enough at one of the many skills a writer needs, flaws in the other skills don’t matter. I dont agree with this. Joyce’s Ullyses is hardly a page turner, but it has something amazing going on. Most fiction is about making reader want to read more, but there are plenty of other things you can do with writing, some that are of great value. > [@](#): > > The ability to plot like Brown is not trivial (if you think it is, try it sometime). If his prose is clunky, it just means he’s better in other aspects of writing so that his flaws aren’t important. Except, of course, that he cribbed all the interesting parts of the plot from “Holy Blood, Holy Grail” ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2006, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737/20 "2006-04-22T21:28:39Z")
[A smile played around the author’s lips.](http://books.guardian.co.uk/danbrown/story/0,,1749709,00.html) - fantastically written Guardian article about the Holy Blood, Holy Grail trial, in the style of the author. “Renowned author Dan Brown awoke slowly.” Enjoy! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-wrong-with-dan-browns-writings-example-provided/353737.md?page=2)