# What's your brilliant get-rich-quick scheme? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 19, 2004, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740 "2004-11-19T22:49:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/41 "2004-11-21T15:46:00Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > My movie, _Banned in Eight States for Excessive Nudity and Sexual Situations_, will beat yours in DVD sales though. My movie **Brad Pitt Topless While Mowing The Lawn** will outgross Movie and DVD sales of everyone else. ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/42 "2004-11-21T15:56:22Z")
Sell a Pistons-Pacers brawl DVD!!! [http://www.hdhockey.com/pacerspistonsbrawl.html](http://www.hdhockey.com/pacerspistonsbrawl.html) ---
**Author:** ![stately\_plump\_buck\_mulligan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@stately\_plump\_buck\_mulligan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stately_plump_buck_mulligan)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/43 "2004-11-21T16:55:33Z")
> [@FinnAgain](#): > > At [roughly fifty times the LD50](http://www.erowid.org/ask/ask.cgi?ID=2954), it is unlikely many folks would be awake long. > > But, [them hippy smokes aint nowhere near as good as a pack of Nat Shermans](http://www.natsherman.com/product.cfm?CFID=492497&CFTOKEN=cc62ae8ca3223dfb-5B286024-65B8-EC0F-D2FA230861EB704B&productid=1111) > > **simply\_cats** : > While reduing road rage might be a good idea, I, for one, would like to make money off of it. > > I’m going to make a kit, and call it the Road Rage 5000 (spiffy, eh?) > > This kit will consist of transparent LCD screens on the front and back windshields and a computer on the dash that’d have advanced voice recognition abilities. > > Someone cuts you off? > “Hey motherfucker, learn to drive!” shows up on your front windshield in huge red letters. > > You cut someone else off? > “Ha ha. Tool. Eat my dust.” shows up on your read windshield in huge red letters. > > I think I’d make a fortune, at least until the families of people who were killed due to use of this product would start suing. **FinnAgain** , you are incredible. I’ve been wanting something like your RR5000 ever since I started driving. I actually made a little sign out of cardboard and popsicle sticks - think those auction paddles - that says USE YOUR FUCKING BLINKER, but it got whipped away by the wind upon its fourth use. I then launched into weeks of brooding over the logistics of a big, light-up display from which I could, you know, _communicate_ with my fellow drivers. Annnd I do luv me some Natties. oh wait > [@](#): > > Originally Posted by **FinnAgain** > _Originally Posted by **Stately Plumb Buck Mulligan** _ BURSTS INTO TEARS ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/44 "2004-11-21T18:05:34Z")
> [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > BURSTS INTO TEARS Hah. That will teach me to post at ungodly-in-the-morning after a long night. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/45 "2004-11-21T22:34:04Z")
Hi and welcome to active posting **Vreemdeling**! \*\*Tusculan \*\* and I couldn’t help noticing your [Dutch username](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=5522640#post5522640). ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/46 "2004-11-22T01:38:52Z")
D’oh! That should have read “ungodly-o’clock” Now I am well rested, and my neurons are firing. > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > **FinnAgain** , you are incredible. Thanks much for that by the way. I would say we should cue some more warm embraces, but then I’d have to make a joke about how you can’t know if I’m incredible without having come over to my place to check out my etchings. 😉 > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > I’ve been wanting something like your RR5000 ever since I started driving. I actually made a little sign out of cardboard and popsicle sticks - think those auction paddles - that says USE YOUR FUCKING BLINKER, but it got whipped away by the wind upon its fourth use. That is fucking awesome. I’ve been known to snipe “Ya know, blinkers work, asshole!” Unfortuantely the other motorist remains unaware of the 1920’s style hate ray I focus om them. > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > I then launched into weeks of brooding over the logistics of a big, light-up display from which I could, you know, _communicate_ with my fellow drivers. “We cannot see to reach an end, crippling our communication…” [ahem] I was thinking that it’d be neat to have drivers’ cell numbers be the same as their license plates. We probably don’t need to encourage cell phone usage while driving though. > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > Annnd I do luv me some Natties. On a tangent, where did you first find 'em? I decided that nats are ‘my brand’ when I was living in Manhattan. How’d a cali ~grins~ native get a hold of their natural goodness? ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/47 "2004-11-22T02:07:46Z")
I would create a line of 3 products. The first would, after spending however long it takes to find some loophole to get it FCC approved, would emit a signal which would mess up cell phone reception. It would have a relatively short range, so it would only be effective in crowded places (movie theaters, for example). The second product would be a jammer detector. So you could see where all the asshats trying to jam your phone are hiding. The third product would be a cloaking add-on for the jammer which would restrict the detector’s range- giving the jammer a ‘safe zone’ to jam undetected. First people would buy the jammers, because they would be irate about cell phones going off in classrooms and movie theaters. Eventually, people would get tired of having their phones jammed, and they would go out and spring for the Jammer detector to avoid areas where cell phones are being jammed, or to punch people jamming their phone 😛 THEN, the people who were pissed-off in the first place would get the cloakers, so they could continue to jam the phones without getting punched 😛 In addition, there would be a special unjammable ‘911’ phone which would also function as a kind of human lo-jack, much like the GPS-enabled bra proposed a while back to help find kidnap victims. So people could still contact someone in an emergency, but wouldn’t be bothering people with annoying cell phone conversations in movie theaters/classrooms. WE’D MAKE BILLIONS! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/48 "2004-11-22T02:18:31Z")
> [@Incubus](#): > > The first would, after spending however long it takes to find some loophole to get it FCC approved, would emit a signal which would mess up cell phone reception. It would have a relatively short range, so it would only be effective in crowded places (movie theaters, for example). [done](http://www.cellbusters.com/) > [@Incubus](#): > > The second product would be a jammer detector. So you could see where all the asshats trying to jam your phone are hiding. [and done](http://gbppr.dyndns.org/PROJ/mil/jamdetect/) > [@Incubus](#): > > The third product would be a cloaking add-on for the jammer which would restrict the detector’s range- giving the jammer a ‘safe zone’ to jam undetected. Not done, as far as my google-fu can determine. (have I been wooshed?) ---
**Author:** ![stately\_plump\_buck\_mulligan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@stately\_plump\_buck\_mulligan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stately_plump_buck_mulligan)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/49 "2004-11-22T02:35:41Z")
_Etchings_, hm? Or as the French would say, hein? > [@FinnAgain](#): > > On a tangent, where did you first find 'em? > I decided that nats are ‘my brand’ when I was living in Manhattan. > How’d a cali ~grins~ native get a hold of their natural goodness? _sound of ears exploding_ HEM! I think it was a snobby friend who introduced me to them a couple years back. I have to be in a certain mood to purchase them, but when I do they are lovely and look nice when alternated in a piano key pattern with Djarum Blacks in my cigarette case. That was a rather dorky thing to admit to. Flees. ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/50 "2004-11-22T03:12:51Z")
> [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > _Etchings_, hm? Or as the French would say, hein? [just a corny pickup line](http://www.eye.net/eye/issue/issue_08.03.95/NEWS/nec0803.htm) And in any case, I’m a poet/writer, not an artist. So… wanna come up to my place and hear some of my poetry? 🆒 > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > HEM! I think it was a snobby friend who introduced me to them a couple years back. I have to be in a certain mood to purchase them, but when I do they are lovely and look nice when alternated in a piano key pattern with Djarum Blacks in my cigarette case. Mmmmm. Djarums… I used to smoke Djarum Cloves (including the unfiltered ones), are the Blacks similar? > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > That was a rather dorky thing to admit to. Oh baby, talk nerdy to me! (besides, my username is based on a play on words by Joyce, I love [Adult Swim], and have been known to thoroughly embarass grocery shopping partners by dancing to the muzak. I can happily join you in Nerdlandia should the need arise) > [@stately plump buck mulligan](#): > > Flees. Come back, you still haven’t seen my etchings! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![stately\_plump\_buck\_mulligan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@stately\_plump\_buck\_mulligan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stately_plump_buck_mulligan)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/51 "2004-11-22T03:36:59Z")
[love]adult swim[/love] Blacks are the best cloves made by Djarum. And not just for the badass black wrappin’s, neither. I think I prefer the ‘minks’ line better, myself. 😛 Back on topic? My new get-rich-quick scheme is to write trashy romance novels. For furries! ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2004, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740/52 "2004-11-22T04:22:36Z")
Say, if you felt like talking about AS or Djarums or even minks without cluttering up a thread you could always, I dunno, IM me or drop me an email or something. 😃😉 [ahem] Topic, yes… I’ve always thought that a chain of drive-through pizza parlors would do really well. Maybe if you add a drive-through movie rental store in the same building. Drive up, get a slice\* and a flick, drive off happy. \*there might be high overhead, as you’d have to sell by the slice and always keep fresh pie handy, as well as having enough pizza on hand to deal with unexpected lines. Either that, or be able to cook up a few real damn fast. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-brilliant-get-rich-quick-scheme/275740.md?page=2)