# What's Your "Default" Cuss-Word?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [November 17, 2004, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170 "2004-11-17T01:28:16Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 5
### Author:  [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2004, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/81 "2004-11-17T23:43:46Z")
My Mother’s: Shoot. Except, I inunciate it: shƐt
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### Author:  [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2004, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/82 "2004-11-17T23:49:19Z")
Of those already mentioned, I have used “fuck” (of course), “assfucker,” “Jesus fuck” (when I was younger, not so much any more), and, yes, “balls.”
These days, most commonly, I will spout “fuck,” with “monkeyfucker” a distant second; or if I have a moment to censor myself, “zut alors.” That one gets some odd looks.
I would like very much to bring back “zounds,” which is short for “God’s wounds” and is quite profane in the original and literal sense of the word. Maybe I’ll start with “'sblood” and see how it goes.
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### Author:  [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/83 "2004-11-18T01:36:49Z")
The Daughters have reminded me that I am prone to saying “Jiminy Cricket” on occasion.
It appears my rather quaint style of cursing is a never-ending source of amusement for my offspring.
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### Author:  [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/84 "2004-11-18T01:45:00Z")
My mother’s favorite, which kills me every time, is “Jesus Christopher Columbus!” or “Gee Wee Louee [like Louise without the -se]”
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### Author:  [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/85 "2004-11-18T04:15:29Z")
> [@TellMeI'mNotCrazy](#):
>
> My mother’s favorite, which kills me every time, is “Jesus Christopher Columbus!” or “Gee Wee Louee [like Louise without the -se]”
My mother’s favorite is “garsh.” And she sounds just like Goofy when she says it.
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### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/86 "2004-11-18T16:37:58Z")
My Dad used to say “Jeezum Crowbars” on the few occasions when he attempted to clean up his language; and he clearly picked this up from my grandfather, who used it as a substitute only slightly more often. Because of this, I had a hard time saying “crowbar” until about the age of ten, worried it might be a naughty word. Fortunately, “crowbars” come up in conversation only rarely.
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### Author:  [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/87 "2004-11-18T16:48:08Z")
Thirty years ago [Ack! Thirty years??] a co-worker let loose with: “Oh, Jesus wept and Peter mopped it up!”
Still can’t decide if it was quaint or just odd.
I’ve recently taken to muttering “Horse pickles!” Don’t know why. (Yes, I’m familiar with the term horse apple.)
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### Author:  [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/88 "2004-11-18T17:52:46Z")
> [@Tripler](#):
>
> No, really, I can tell you of the exact moment I “invented” this term. I was talking with a guy about a ‘Poker Party’ we were having, and he was resisting spending the $10 to join the pool. I told him because he was declining that I was “inventing a new term for you pal! You’re part hosehead and part dirtbag. Thus, I label you a hosebag!!”
>
> And thus began a new/revived slang term in 2003.
Sorry, but you’re 20 years behind the times. 🙂
Just to set the record straight, “hosebag” was our usual euphemism for “slut” from 1983-1987. It still gets used on occasion, but with nowhere near the frequency it did when we were in our teens.
In fact, I just did a bit of digging and found an old D&D character sheet from 1985 featuring a character sketch of my fighter. One of my buddies erased 'ol Callon’s sword and replaced it with a sign reading “We Want Hosebags”, and the change remains to this day. 🙂
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### Author:  [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/89 "2004-11-18T17:58:19Z")
> [@BJMoose](#):
>
> I’ve recently taken to muttering “Horse pickles!” Don’t know why. (Yes, I’m familiar with the term horse apple.)
That’s weird. I used to know a guy in the 80’s with an exceedingly germanic last name (I think it was Hersepeigel, or something). We called him Horse Pickle.
Poor fella…
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### Author:  [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/90 "2004-11-18T19:02:00Z")
My default is “crap on a bun”. Don’t ask me why.
Robin
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### Author:  [@Catfood\_Purrito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catfood_Purrito)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/91 "2004-11-18T19:12:36Z")
My usual is just “fuck!” There’s a reason why it’s a classic. I’m also quite fond of “Jesus tit!” which I picked up from an old college friend. It’s usually used in times of extreme surprise or exasperation. See also, “oh, for fuck’s sake!” and “Jesus Christ on a cracker with cheese!”
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### Author:  [@FyreFiend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FyreFiend)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/92 "2004-11-18T21:43:56Z")
My old stand by used to be **Bite Me** until I started dating a girl that would take that as a request, and hard too.
Now It’ usually **Fuck** or **Bloody Hell** (I blame that one on reading too much Pratchett)
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### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2004, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/93 "2004-11-18T21:47:36Z")
> [@FyreFiend](#):
>
> My old stand by used to be **Bite Me** until I started dating a girl that would take that as a request, and hard too.
So it never occurred to you to use “Fuck me (and hard, too)” as a substitute??
Oy, that hurts even me.
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### Author:  [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/94 "2004-11-19T00:01:59Z")
Fucker. Not fuck, but fucker. Regardless of whether or not I’m cursing off a person. I’m walking on a sprained ankle, leaving math class the other day, and my weight comes down wrong - “_Fucker_!”
The guy in front of me turned with this horribly apologetic look on his face, and I thus launched into an explanation of my injuries and my cursing practices…
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### Author:  [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/95 "2004-11-19T00:13:34Z")
> [@Waverly](#):
>
> I don?t have a default, my repertoire is pretty diverse, and has become almost reflexive. What I have noticed is that ?mother fucker? is common in my lexicon of profanity. However, not every mother fucker is the same:
> MOTHER fucker = shock, annoyance
> mother FUCKER = amazement, perplexity
> motherfucker = small, needling mistake
What he/she said. With apostrophes.
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### Author:  [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/96 "2004-11-19T00:33:19Z")
I’m always fond if Scheisskopf (shithead). I have absolutely no idea where I picked it up from, but I tend to use it instead of my default Cantonese swearing if there’s too many Asians around.
Perhaps I should change it to “Sweet zombie Jesus!”.
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### Author:  [@SusanStoHelit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SusanStoHelit)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/97 "2004-11-19T00:41:32Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#):
>
> After my time in the Navy I reluctantly realized that I wasn’t going to be able to excise explitives from my ejaculations
>
> > [@Loopydude](#):
> >
> > Well, you, sir, have a brilliant career in PORN ahead of you.
Actually, the word [ejaculation](http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?book=Dictionary&va=ejaculation&x=0&y=0) can also mean a “sudden, emotional utterance”
And I, for one, recommend using it as such as often as possible, if only for the expression of shocked innocence you can wear when someone accuses you of being obscene.
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### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/98 "2004-11-19T00:45:49Z")
> [@SusanStoHelit](#):
>
> Actually, the word [ejaculation](http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?book=Dictionary&va=ejaculation&x=0&y=0) can also mean a “sudden, emotional utterance”
I know, I know, but for fuck’s sake, I couldn’t resist.
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### Author:  [@SusanStoHelit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SusanStoHelit)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/99 "2004-11-19T00:53:15Z")
I always start my cursing with “For the love of…” and change the ending according to my audience:
“For the love of little green apples” is my favorite if I’m around little kids or my mother.
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### Author:  [@SusanStoHelit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SusanStoHelit)
#### Post date: [November 19, 2004, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-default-cuss-word/275170/100 "2004-11-19T01:03:31Z")
My favorite cursing is what they substitute for real cursing on TV adaptations of movies. My favorite was in Good Will Hunting, where Matt Damon kept calling everyone a “monkeyfunner”
Hee!
> [@](#):
>
> I know, I know, but for fuck’s sake, I couldn’t resist.
This is completely off topic, but does that mean I’ve been whooshed? If not, what is a whooshing? I’ve tried searching for it, but got back 20+ pages of results. This fucking newbie would appreciate the shit out of it if you would give her a bleeding clue.
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