Ed Subitzki’s “Worlds in Collusion” in the National Lampoon #41.
My favorite has to be William Cooper’s all-encompassing world view conspiracy. A friend gave me a tape with one of his lectures on it. I was tickled and amazed that Mr Cooper could weave so many of the more popular conspiracies into a single, relatively coherent weltanschauung. I mean, he had Kennedy, and the Bilderburgers, and fractional reserve banking, and Fort Knox, and the Jews, and UFOs, and Vietnam, and the CFR, and the Trilateral Comm … well, you get the idea.
I recently got a cassette deck hooked up here at home. I’ll have to see if I can find that sucker. I’ll play it at night as I go to sleep, and dream the dreams of one who knows what’s *really * going on…
Of course the Apollo Moon landing was a hoax- in fact, the entire idea that there is “moon” orbiting the Earth is the result of a massive conspiracy. The Moon Does Not Exist.
Francis E. Dec, Esq. – Your Only Hope For A Future!
Fear the “Computer God Parroting Puppet Gangster Slaves” and their “Frankenstein Eyesight TV” and “Frankenstein Earphone Radio”!
“North dakota isn’t a state, it doesn’t even exist.”
- Homer Simpson
Whoa, I just quoted the Simpsons. Does this make me a real Doper? Or do I have to get 1000 posts?
The chemtrails crowd never fails to give me that mix of frustration/entertainment/bafflement/amusement that all good conspiracies must have.
Holy crap. I now understand where one of the easter eggs from the computer game “Myth II: Soulblighter” came from.
http://myth.bungie.org/legends/fieldguide/fs07_beyond_cloudspine.html
My current favorite is “Peak Oil,” though I don’t really know how much is conspiracy and how much is for real. Some people would have you believe we are on the brink of total worldwide destruction:
My personal favorite worked much better back before the breakup of Ma Bell (yes, I know, I’m old), but it still works to an extent today: the all-knowing Phone Company.
Ever wonder why the phones in your house have a separate power source built into the lines, that will work even when your power is out? It’s so the Phone Company can listen in to your conversations at will. After all, how do you know that the microphone in the headset isn’t active just because the phone is hung up? The Phone Company could easily flip a remote switch and activate it, listening to and recording anything that happens near a phone.
They know. They’re listening to you. Phones are everywhere.
Thats WYOMING that doesn’t exist!
See!!! They’ve switched states in an attempt to…ummm
Icke is my fave, cause he’s funny.
That all gay men are part of a nation wide conspiracy to covert, or seduce, or infect all straight with the intention of destroying the might of the USA.
With the willing or unwitting colusion of the feminazis, of course.
And I still don’t believe ALL the crop circles were faked.
Michael Jordan’s first “retirement” was actually a suspension for gambling. MJ gambled so much that his creditors had his father murdered. David Stern could not in a million years impose harsh discipline on his most visible star ever, so he told him to take the year off, go play baseball, and promised to market the hell out of his return.
For a more “normal” one, anything that has to do with Tesla. The stories about what he did, the speculation about what else he did, and the theories claiming that a lot of his stuff was kept down by The Man because it worked too well.
Oooh! Oooh! I forgot chemtrails! Thanks, Miss Gretchen !
Osama bin Laden is under lock and key at Guantanimo Bay. This is why the US is keeping out the Red Cross and all the international organizations, and why they’re trying so hard to hang on to everybody who’s held there, to keep the story from leaking.
One week before the election, he’ll be shipped to a remote cave in Iraq, where he’ll be “Captured” before live TV cameras, thereby proving that Sadaam was helping Al Queda.
-lv
I don’t have a favorite conspiracy theory, but I just wanted to give brief props to Sam Lowry for one of the best user names I’ve seen in a long time.
The Tehran Times reported a few months ago that the whole Iraq war was staged. They said Bush and Saddam are secret allies and the whole thing was just a ploy to crush Iran.
I know a lot of “patriot” types, so I’m up-to-date on the latest and most fashionable conspiracy theories.
A few of my favorites:
- Black Helicopters
- Chemtrails
- The U.S. government had prior knowledge about 9/11
- The U.S. government had prior knowledge about Oklahoma City. It even helped plant the bombs!
- FEMA is building concentration camps and crematoriums
Two words: Alex Jones :rolleyes:
Someone on the Supreme Court’s a woman, and it’s not the one you think!
The Shroud of Turin is fun, and the Donation of Constantine was successful for a long time.
My favorite is the notion that there are alternative medical discoveries that really work, but are suppressed by the medical establishment so that they can make money off regular medicine. All the while the medical establishment is dying of the diseases that could have been cured, but choose not to so as to protect the secret.
There was a particularly entertaining nutcase on another messageboard I used to frequent who had a different medical conspiracy every few months. First it was shaving cream, then it was aspartame, then it was the notion that anti-perspirants blocked the excretion of toxins from the armpits and led to practically every ill you could mention. Then the messageboard went to pay-to-post and I quit.
Regards,
Shodan
“TWA’s flight #800 was shot down by a US Navy missle by mistake, and it’s all a cover up.”
My friend’s wife, who’s dad retired from Northrop-Grumman told her it was true. He said he heard it from a buddy who still worked for the company. Almost every time I went over there for dinner I had to hear about it. :rolleyes: