# What's your "hooker name?" **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 12, 1999, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025 "1999-08-12T20:24:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/61 "1999-08-13T16:55:00Z")
Omigod, “Puddles,” that’s great! And Gr8Kat, “Whiskers Rowell” sounds very “Kitten with a Whip” to me! ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/62 "1999-08-14T05:14:00Z")
And “Bulldog Zimmerman” sounds like Bob Dylan’s younger brother, who went into law enforcement. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/63 "1999-08-14T05:26:00Z")
Milky Morris A little too wholesome, I think. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/64 "1999-08-14T05:29:00Z")
Okay, if we’re talking the first pet I remember that was a family pet: Princess First pet I had responsibility for: Goldie Street I grew up on: Split between Andover Court and Calle Yucca. Hmm…so I could be Princess Andover, Goldie Andover, Goldie Yucca, and Princess Yucca. Princess Yucca…Hmm. Don’t think that would sell too many videos! My boyfriend would be Eliot Barbara. Hmm. Sounds like a transvestite. * * * “Me fail English? That’s unpossible!” “English? Who needs that? I’m never going to England.” ---
**Author:** ![Brother\_Haus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Brother\_Haus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brother_Haus)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/65 "1999-08-14T05:37:00Z")
This is very odd, but I’m all for odd things. Pet + Street= Satchel Sunrise (Ooo, he must like the mornings). Mascot + Maiden Name= Bengal Brownell (Now that’s high class). Middle Name + Current Street= Timothy Lions (That’s got white boy written all over it). I’m staying with Satchel Sunrise. Out of respect for my “kitty”. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/66 "1999-08-14T05:53:00Z")
Oh, my, let’s see: Pet + street = Spot Highway 124 (don’t think so) Mascot + Maiden name = Comet Gibson (1940’s football star?) Middle name + street = Western Maple (That’s it!) Western is a strange middle name, but it fits perfectly with my current street. I’ve even got a tagline: “Western Maple - the hardest woody in the world!” * * * The overwhelming majority of people have more than the average (mean) number of legs. – E. Grebenik ---
**Author:** ![Stella\_Fantasia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/74df32/32.png) [@Stella\_Fantasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stella_Fantasia)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/67 "1999-08-14T05:54:00Z")
Caroline Dove. My screenname(which is taken from Nabokov’s _Lolita_) is a better porno name. Though I kind of like “Caroline Dove” better than my actual name… I also lived on Schoolhouse Lane for a while, but “Schoolhouse” is a little too sick to be part of anyone’s porno anything. EEEEWW. ---
**Author:** ![mr\_john](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@mr\_john](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mr_john)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 1999, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/68 "1999-08-14T05:59:00Z")
## For strippers and pornstars this works ,but hookers? I don’t think hokers HAVE last names. Bluepony, you’ve probably had some experience with that,what do you think?(HEE HEE) Now lets see, posted 08-13-1999 08:00 AM (first pet, street name): Scooter Jackson eh other pets;Spatz,eh;Cyclone Jackson(stripper);Mopsy Jackson;Hank Jackson(Now at the plate…) (high school mascot, mother’s maiden name): Sandie Judge, eh (Sandie Jackson?) let’s try University Buffalo Judge no! ## (middle name, current street) Wayne Lorraine mmm well not too bad CYCLONE LORRAINE! A really wild stripper I just realized with this information,especially that hi school mascot,Bluepony can track me down. And if anybody can he can. Signitorily yours, Mr John " Pardon me while I have a strange interlude."-Marx “…”-Marx ---
**Author:** ![funneefarmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@funneefarmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/funneefarmer)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/69 "1999-08-13T18:50:00Z")
Mascot+ mother’s maiden: Panther Heller Works a lot better than my father’s name(see above) ---
**Author:** ![tipiwoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6bbea6/32.png) [@tipiwoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tipiwoo)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/70 "1999-08-13T18:54:00Z")
mine? well, our (my family’s) first pet was already alive when I was born so…that name would be: Sasha Winston OR the name of MY first pet would make my name: Tiger Winston I’m thinkin I like the Tiger name. 🙂 * * * tipi 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/71 "1999-08-13T19:03:00Z")
Rosie Cavell. (God, I’m embarrassed.) But if I ever do drag, I have my name all picked out: Faygeleh Shiksa. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/72 "1999-08-13T20:42:00Z")
Depending on which pet you count (there was a dog and a cat around from the moment I was born), I’m either Burgandy Mayhood or Cocoa Mayhood. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/73 "1999-08-13T20:44:00Z")
Wow, I really scored on this one: Coquette Martell…guess I was born to be in the sex trade. hey wait…I AM!!! My fiance is Butchie Plunkett. One I like better, your Jedi name & PLANET: Make or model of your car/last drug you ingested. Which would make me: Paseo of the planet Nic-o-Tine. ## And my fiance is Buick of Ale. * * * We do precision guesswork ---
**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/74 "1999-08-13T20:45:00Z")
Orpheus Morgan… hmmm… ---
**Author:** ![Guy\_Propski](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/5e9695/32.png) [@Guy\_Propski](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guy_Propski)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/75 "1999-08-13T20:52:00Z")
Subaru Caffiene—nah. Mustang Bayer–sound like German scientist that was adopted by Indians. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/76 "1999-08-13T20:55:00Z")
Try Su Baru of Caf Fiene ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/77 "1999-08-13T20:58:00Z")
Thunderbird of Aleve. :::snort::: ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/78 "1999-08-13T21:03:00Z")
Hmmm… Cirrus of Mo Trin. (Hey, that one might actually work!) ---
**Author:** ![topolino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/91b2a8/32.png) [@topolino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/topolino)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/79 "1999-08-13T21:19:00Z")
I’d be Contour of the planet Elavil ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 1999, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025/80 "1999-08-13T21:37:00Z")
Neon Paxil * * * “I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-hooker-name/8025.md?page=5)