What's your least favorite plot device/character/section of the Harry Potter books (OPEN SPOILERS)

[TruCelt]

I don’t really mind the technical misses but I do mind when the characters just don’t ring true. Like the whole Sirius is being tortured at the ministry thing. Who here buys that Harry forgot about that mirror? Seriously?!? He’s been handed a walkie talkie on which he can contact his GodFather at any time, and he. . . tosses it into his trunk to get broken?!?

No way he gets any further than the first feast before he gives Sirius a call to let him know he’s arrived safe, the hat had a new song, and the treacle tarts were runny. . .

[Taenia_spp]

@Jragon

I find the whole masquerade aspect to be pretty inadequately justified. […] But “people would want magical solutions to their problems” is what you’re going with?
[…]

This has always bugged me. Look, why the hell should you write on parchment with a quill–a tool that you need to constantly need to replenish (inkpots were mentioned in the series). Hello? A cursory examination of the Muggle world would reveal we have an invention far above and beyond archaic technology: THE BALL-FUCKING-POINT PEN.

Similarly, why would you want to send letters via owl? Didn’t anyone ever think to use of personal computers, as they would greatly speed communication, as well as provide a great productivity tool

[Taenia_spp]

Oh right, a few more things.

It’s mentioned in the first book that children are enrolled in Wizarding school at the tender age of thirteen, is it? The entire canon mentions classes that the children take, but they are all invariable magically based. Are we to expect that the entire wizarding world is stuck at a seventh-grade reading level with no knowledge of higher mathematics?

Another thing that doesn’t jive: Presumably, the magic in this world obeys a set of consistent (super)natural laws. This, saying “Alohomora” to unlock a locked door must be performed in a precise way, as has been mentioned in the books. Thus, shouldn’t the magic in this world be subject to the methods of scientific enquiry? Why no advanced degrees in magical education, where the equivalent of lowly paid graduate students push the boundaries by working out the intricacies and mechanisms of the spells.

In a similar vein, the incantations that the magic needs all have Latin roots. Are we also to assume that wizards and witches in, say, China need to learn an entirely new lexicon in order to perform magic?

[Sir_T-Cups]

@Taenia_spp

In a similar vein, the incantations that the magic needs all have Latin roots. Are we also to assume that wizards and witches in, say, China need to learn an entirely new lexicon in order to perform magic?

My response to this would be that they would continue to teach it in Latin (a dead language) around the world to make it more “universal”.

[KneadToKnow]

@Taenia_spp

It’s mentioned in the first book that children are enrolled in Wizarding school at the tender age of thirteen, is it? The entire canon mentions classes that the children take, but they are all invariable magically based. Are we to expect that the entire wizarding world is stuck at a seventh-grade reading level with no knowledge of higher mathematics?

It’s worse than that. They actually start Hogwarts at 11.

[Chimera]

Language wise, there’s a very strong current in Ceremonial Magick that not only do words have power, but words in old languages have even more power! Hebrew, Greek, Latin, depending on the form of Magick. Personally, I think it’s silly, but there you have it. Mispronouncing words in a language that you don’t speak, in a very slow and dramatic fashion doesn’t strike me as “power”.

Latin was the Common Tongue of Europe for a very long time. The language that learned people could use to communicate with each other despite whatever language their nation used. It was commonly taught right up until the 20th century as part of a classical education, and in fact, still is taught in some places. It might strike Americans as being a bit silly that the spells most commonly have a Latin base, but it is entirely reasonable in an Old World context.

The Chinese Wizarding world would, quite naturally, use Chinese. The Muslim Wizarding community would use Arabic - probably a very classical form of Arabic.
Hogwarts is, essentially, Magic Public High School. Nothing more. Required education of a very basic level of every Wizard child. You don’t learn the really advanced stuff there. You learn it elsewhere. Sadly, JKR didn’t create a Magic University somewhere else, for advanced studies, which is something of a gaping hole in her world. But alas, the books were aimed more at children, so they don’t go into great detail about the adult world, just like you don’t tend to learn a lot about the real world of adulthood in high school. You get taught some very basic shit, then you get out in the real world and discover just how unprepared you really are.

[jackdavinci]

Me too on the confusing wand ownership rules, and wanting more balance between the houses, not just G=good, S=bad, others=NPC lol.

I also could have done without the year of camping in book 7, and the thinly disguised copyright metaphor.

[PeskiPiksi]

@eleanorigby

The kids DO end up changing events via the time-traveler; that’s the whole point of them using it…

But actually, they don’t. If you read it carefully, on the first go-around of the night’s events, everything happens exactly the same as it did the second time, you just see it from a different angle. If that makes sense.

I agree with pretty much everything that’s been mentioned so far, especially Grawp and Quidditch. And even though I love the series (my username is from Chamber of Secrets), I have a few of my own to contribute:

Philosopher’s Stone: The whole setup of interesting obstacles that just happen to match the kid’s special skills hiding the Stone. I mean, really?

Chamber of Secrets: Harry and Ron go to the staff room to tell them they’ve discovered where the entrance to the Chamber is. Only when they get there, they find out that Ginny’s been taken. So they, naturally…go back to the Common Room to sit and stare at each other mournfully for a few hours, instead of passing on this potentially useful information to someone who might be able to use it.

Prisoner of Azkaban: This one’s minor, but when Fred and George give Harry the Marauder’s Map, they explain that they have it memorized. Which is stupid, because the primary purpose of the map is to tell you where people are, not how to get places.

Goblet of Fire: Most already mentioned. Also, why was the Quidditch season canceled? For all but four students, the Tournament only used up three days in the entire school year. I think they could have handled the load. Geez.

Order of the Phoenix: Okay, so Dumbledore doesn’t want to have close contact with Harry in case it reveals the mind-connection to Voldemort, or something like that. So, dude…why don’t you write him a damned letter? “Yo, Harry. I know you’re seeing all this stuff from Voldemort’s mind. Creepy, isn’t it? Sorry I can’t tell you this in person, but with your connection to Mr. Bad Man it could be dangerous for both of us. Oh, heads up…Voldemort wants you in the Department of Mysteries, because it’s the only way he can get the weapon, so disregard any visions that tell you you need to go there. It’ll be a trick, okay? See ya around!”

Half-Blood Prince: Another small one, but it bugged me that when Harry realized he liked Ginny, all of his internal thoughts were about how Ron would take it. No mention was ever made of her old crush on him, and how stupid he was to have blown it when he had the chance. Or maybe him thinking, “she used to like me, maybe she’ll like me again.” The crush went completely unacknowleged.

Deathly Hallows: The defenses put up by Moody to keep Snape out of Grimmauld Place were pretty lame. And I know most people love it, but Molly’s “Not my daughter, you BITCH!” makes me cringe. Molly is not Ripley, Jo.

God, I’m a nerd.

[hazel-rah]

@PeskiPiksi

Prisoner of Azkaban: This one’s minor, but when Fred and George give Harry the Marauder’s Map, they explain that they have it memorized. Which is stupid, because the primary purpose of the map is to tell you where people are, not how to get places.

Well, it’s a little of both, actually. It tells you where people are, but it also tells you the locations of secret passages within the castle, some leading all the way to Hogsmeade. And presumably the locations and directions to access all kinds of other interesting and secret rooms, such as the Room of Requirement, House common rooms, etc. Fred and George will have certainly committed all that to memory.

Incidentally, I thought Molly’s bon mot (more of a bon mort, really) to Bellatrix sucked too.

[Grumman]

@Taenia_spp

Similarly, why would you want to send letters via owl? Didn’t anyone ever think to use of personal computers, as they would greatly speed communication, as well as provide a great productivity tool

There is apparently an explanation for this, as there’s some form of magical EMP that stops electronics working properly.

Still, if they were smart the wizards would send some wizards to a muggle university, with the goal of eventually replicating a computer’s electronic logic using magitech.

[running_coach]

@Grumman

**There is apparently an explanation for this, as there’s some form of magical EMP that stops electronics working properly.
**
Still, if they were smart the wizards would send some wizards to a muggle university, with the goal of eventually replicating a computer’s electronic logic using magitech.

That’s The Dresden Files. There are several mentions through the books of Harry using Dudley’s computer when he’s alone in the house plus Mr. Weasley’s collection of Muggle stuff.

[DesertDog]

@hazel-rah

Incidentally, I thought Molly’s bon mot (more of a bon mort, really) to Bellatrix sucked too.

It worked for me. It’s always the quiet ones you have to watch out for, you know. Besides, would you rather have her sounding like Auntie Em?

@Auntie Em

Almira Gulch. Just because you own half the county doesn’t mean that you have the power to run the rest of us. For twenty-three years I’ve been dying to tell you what I thought of you! And now… well, being a Christian woman, I can’t say it!

The Year of Camping I could have done without.

[PeskiPiksi]

@hazel-rah

Well, it’s a little of both, actually. It tells you where people are, but it also tells you the locations of secret passages within the castle, some leading all the way to Hogsmeade. And presumably the locations and directions to access all kinds of other interesting and secret rooms, such as the Room of Requirement, House common rooms, etc. Fred and George will have certainly committed all that to memory.

Okay, yeah…point taken. But nitpick…the Map doesn’t show the Room of Requirement. Remember Harry couldn’t figure out where Draco was going all through HBP.

I also thought Harry should have given the map to Ginny in the last book. She and Neville and Luna could have used it a lot more than he could sitting out in the woods!

[KneadToKnow]

@runner pat

That’s The Dresden Files. There are several mentions through the books of Harry using Dudley’s computer when he’s alone in the house plus Mr. Weasley’s collection of Muggle stuff.

Yes, but:

Computers, televisions and other electronic devices, as well as electricity, are not to be found at Hogwarts. In Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Hermione indicates that due to the high levels of magic, “substitutes for magic (that) Muggles use” such as computers, radar and electricity “go haywire” around Hogwarts. Radios however, make an exception. Rowling explains this by saying that the radios are not powered by electricity and are powered by magic.

[Lamia]

@PeskiPiksi

But actually, they don’t. If you read it carefully, on the first go-around of the night’s events, everything happens exactly the same as it did the second time, you just see it from a different angle. If that makes sense.

Right. IIRC Dumbledore even says something like “I know you’ll succeed, because you already have.” The most obvious example of this is that the first time Harry experiences the events of that night, he’s saved from the Dementors by a Patronus spell cast by a mysterious person across the lake. When he travels back in time, he realizes at the last minute that he’s the one who has to cast that spell. He experiences the same event from the perspective of both the person rescued and the person doing the rescuing, but the same thing happens both times.

[Reno_Nevada]

@PeskiPiksi

Philosopher’s Stone: The whole setup of interesting obstacles that just happen to match the kid’s special skills hiding the Stone. I mean, really?
.

Also, of course, if the kids had just gone back to bed when they discovered the first obstacle had been breached (or, God forbid, told some responsible adult), the villain would have been foiled by Dumbledore’s trap. Presumably Dumbledore would have found him in the morning, neutralized him, and spared everyone the following 6 books.

[Anne_Neville]

It always seemed unfair that, in Quidditch, the kids had to provide their own broomsticks, which is a blatant advantage for rich kids over poor. You’d think the school would provide broomsticks for Quidditch matches, so that everybody would be on an even playing field.

Why did Dumbledore let Snape get away with bullying Neville Longbottom and favoring Slytherins the way he did? It’s not as if Dumbledore hated Longbottom- if he did, he wouldn’t have given him points for Gryffindor at the end of Book 1.

There are enough mixed marriages and Muggle-borns that Muggles would have to know that witches and wizards exist. There must be some Muggle-borns who are close to their parents and talk about what goes on at school. There must be some Muggles who marry witches or wizards without being totally estranged from their Muggle families.

[Anaamika]

@Anne_Neville

It always seemed unfair that, in Quidditch, the kids had to provide their own broomsticks, which is a blatant advantage for rich kids over poor. You’d think the school would provide broomsticks for Quidditch matches, so that everybody would be on an even playing field.

Not just that but also to wizarding families over non-wizarding families. You think a non-wizarding family would have any real idea what kind of broomstick to buy? I never liked that one either.

[Anne_Neville]

Why doesn’t the wizarding world have paper money? Don’t all those coins get heavy and unwieldy, especially for large purchases? They have a place in Diagon Alley to exchange Wizarding and Muggle money, so it’s not as if wizards have never heard of paper money.

Why do wizards keep their money in vaults, and have to go to the actual vaults to get it? When Muggles want to withdraw money from the bank, we ask the teller, and they give us money (or we use an ATM card). No motion-sickness-inducing cart ride required. It seems a much easier system for the customer and the bank than what Gringotts uses.

[Goblinboy]

I think you guys are being a little too logical about some of these complaints. I think a lot of the inconsistencies can be explained by two sayings:

We’ve always done it this way!

It’s tradition.

The wizarding world is ruled by old people. Wizards and witches are shown to live very long lives in good health. I would expect their society to be very conservative and resistant to change. Part of the reason for the lack of effort put into rooting out the Death Eaters after Voldemort’s first death would be due to how disruptive it’d be to their society, I imagine.

I really don’t think it takes much more than that to explain much of the illogic in Rowling’s books, and in that it feels much more real, as frustrating as it may be at times.