# What's Your Porno Name? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 8, 2000, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287 "2000-11-08T12:53:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Spritle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Spritle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spritle)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/1 "2000-11-08T12:53:15Z")
If you were in the “adult entertainment” industry, what would your name be? A local radio station says that you can figure out your porno name thus: 1. first name = name of first pet 2. last name = name of first street on which you lived. This would make mine either “Aries Morgan” or “Tracy Morgan” (depending on how one defines some of the terms), neither are that bad. The SO’s would be “Samantha Hannes”. Again, not bad. I, however, have thought of some cool porno names: Sharon McHunt Dick Dribble Willie Bangor Rock Solid Now it’s your turn. Using either the formula above or your imagination, what is your porno name? ---
**Author:** ![poohpah\_chalupa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/91b2a8/32.png) [@poohpah\_chalupa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/poohpah_chalupa)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/2 "2000-11-08T13:34:02Z")
Formula: “Kiki Downing” …otherwise, George Costanza had one of my favorites: “Buck Naked” ---
**Author:** ![JimmyNipples](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/eb9ed0/32.png) [@JimmyNipples](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimmyNipples)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/3 "2000-11-08T13:43:07Z")
Damn…I wanted to be Buck Naked. If I use the formula that radio station offers, I’d be: **Robbie Ladner** I’d rather be: Harry Reams, Dirk Diggler, or even Timmy the Wonder Dink. ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/4 "2000-11-08T13:47:26Z")
Bandit Bryant. Not too bad… ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/5 "2000-11-08T13:51:22Z")
Here’s where the “conventional naming” falls flat… Apparently, my porno name would be Zachias Cemetery. ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/6 "2000-11-08T13:54:37Z")
With that formula, I’d be “Shep 96th Street” Wow, real sexy. Maybe I’ll change it a little to “Shag 69th Street” I’d rather be Connie Lingus. 😛 😛 😛 😛 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/7 "2000-11-08T14:00:44Z")
Mine would be “Zen Reamer”… kinda mysterious, eh? ---
**Author:** ![ladybug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/46a35a/32.png) [@ladybug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladybug)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/8 "2000-11-08T14:05:28Z")
> [@](#): > > A local radio station says that you can figure out your porno name thus: > > 1. first name = name of first pet > 2. last name = name of first street on which you lived. That would make me Lady Ranch. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/9 "2000-11-08T14:06:16Z")
According to the radio method, “Tippie Hystone?” Naw, I’m a guy. Anybody remember “Big Dick Blacque” from (I believe) the movie _Hardcore_? ---
**Author:** ![Adolph\_Peewee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e47c2d/32.png) [@Adolph\_Peewee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Adolph_Peewee)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/10 "2000-11-08T14:11:26Z")
That’d make me WALLY FLAXMAN! hardly a porn star name! I think I prefer…ORGAZMO!! : ) jeepers…now I know I watch too many Matt Stone and Trey Parker Flix!! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/11 "2000-11-08T14:11:31Z")
Pixel Hickory Glen?? ---
**Author:** ![Tommy\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Tommy\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tommy_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/12 "2000-11-08T14:14:27Z")
The formula says that I would be Scotty Dug Gap. Hmmm? Could work. ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/13 "2000-11-08T14:31:57Z")
Well, my very first pet ever was a cat I had when I was 5 named “Kermit”… so I would be: Kermit Pine No thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/14 "2000-11-08T14:35:01Z")
I am Tiki Greentree—more Bond Girl than porn star. My Mom is Yuppie Sanford (yes, she named her cat “Yuppie” back in the 1940s!). A woman at my office wins, hands-down: Midnight Cherry. ---
**Author:** ![cheezit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@cheezit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cheezit)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/15 "2000-11-08T14:45:18Z")
Mugzey DelRio at your service. :D:D ---
**Author:** ![c\_goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@c\_goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/c_goat)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/16 "2000-11-08T14:47:43Z")
Priscilla Acorn I guess I’d have to be a transvestite… ---
**Author:** ![PolarField](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b77776/32.png) [@PolarField](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PolarField)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/17 "2000-11-08T14:49:49Z")
Trigger Hammel 🙂 Who would have thought having a dog named trigger would come in handy 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/18 "2000-11-08T14:53:03Z")
You want bad? My first dog was named “Tiny”… ---
**Author:** ![little\_bit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@little\_bit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/little_bit)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/19 "2000-11-08T14:59:04Z")
I had fish for my first pets. The only problem is I never named them. So, using the name of my first _named_ pet… “Smokey Pearl” I think I can live with that. ---
**Author:** ![Spritle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Spritle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spritle)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2000, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287/20 "2000-11-08T15:02:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cheezit \* > \*\*Mugzey DelRio at your service. :D:D \*\* Was this supposed to be a pun? If so, EXCELLENT. If not, how serendipitous (and sublime). [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-porno-name/40287.md?page=2)