# What's Your Safe Word? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 18, 2005, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224 "2005-03-18T22:40:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Miss\_Violaceous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Miss\_Violaceous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Violaceous)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/1 "2005-03-18T22:40:25Z")
Apologies if this has been discussed many a time before, but a search on “safe word” brings up far too many results. :eek: For those in a relationship and have a “safe word” (a word to pause the action in bondage and rough fetish play, so that “no” and “stop” can be reserved for roleplay purposes), care to share? How did you come up with it? For those not in a relationship, do you have one word you particularly like to use with multiple partners, or one you used in past relationships? How did you come up with it? The safe word I use with my boyfriend is “grapefruit.” We have a running joke about fruit salad, and assigning different sexual meanings to various fruits. Grapefruit wasn’t being used, and it’s a pretty sour and attention-getting fruit, so we thought it appropriate. ---
**Author:** ![Dark\_Side\_of\_the\_Floyd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bb73d2/32.png) [@Dark\_Side\_of\_the\_Floyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Side_of_the_Floyd)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/2 "2005-03-18T23:25:34Z")
Banana. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/3 "2005-03-18T23:30:52Z")
Well, usually I like “enough.” But sometimes this one guy would MAKE me use the word “snugglemuffins.” He did this because he knew I hated to say it so he could beat me longer. Good times. ---
**Author:** ![kevja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/4 "2005-03-18T23:39:23Z")
No code word. If you’ve gone that far, just break the scene. It’s over anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/5 "2005-03-18T23:43:52Z")
“Sugar”. Not sure how or when. It just works. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/6 "2005-03-18T23:45:02Z")
> [@Anastasaeon](#): > > “Sugar”. > > Not sure how or when. It just works. Er, not sure how or when _we came up with it_. I know exactly how and when in the moment 😉 Just to clarify. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2005, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/7 "2005-03-18T23:47:10Z")
I don’t have one (don’t do that stuff), but I was going to name my band Safeword…my drummer had to have the current name, though… ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/8 "2005-03-19T03:40:51Z")
Rumplestiltskin. Impossible to forget, doesn’t sound like anything else, and definately gets attention immediately. ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/9 "2005-03-19T04:47:08Z")
Encyclopedia. ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/10 "2005-03-19T04:48:37Z")
Popcorn! ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/11 "2005-03-19T05:47:27Z")
**S A F E W O R D !** ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/12 "2005-03-19T06:29:01Z")
Potato. I see that edible items appear to be a popular choice. ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 9:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/13 "2005-03-19T09:12:13Z")
> [@Bruce\_Daddy](#): > > Popcorn! _ **CAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR** _OOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLL!!! ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 9:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/14 "2005-03-19T09:41:50Z")
“Uncle” ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/15 "2005-03-19T11:50:59Z")
**mxyzptlk** , said backwards and I’m outta there. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/16 "2005-03-19T12:59:38Z")
“Ow! Jesus Christ, no! What the hell are you doing? Put that thing down! No-arrghh!” Actually, we need to work on this. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/17 "2005-03-19T13:50:53Z")
The part I enjoy in scenes is really the roleplay, not so much the actual slap & tickle, so my safeword is just to drop out of character and/or address the dom by his first name. ---
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/18 "2005-03-19T15:03:57Z")
Butterfly pancake. He came up with it, and no, I don’t know why. ---
**Author:** ![UnwrittenNocturne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/6de8d8/32.png) [@UnwrittenNocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UnwrittenNocturne)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/19 "2005-03-19T15:55:07Z")
Pink Elephants. A problem arises when you use a ball gag though. What does everyone else do then? ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2005, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224/20 "2005-03-19T17:35:34Z")
Hand signals. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-safe-word/295224.md?page=2)