# What's your solution to a million unwanted pregnacies occurring as a result of protected sex? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [October 26, 2009, 10:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156 "2009-10-26T10:14:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/241 "2009-10-29T04:38:38Z")
You simply don’t get it. Sex between consenting adults is good – period. Going from 50% tp 90% of women having pre-marital sex is an improvement. There can be some unfortunate consequences of having sex, even if precautions are taken. Medical science has provided solutions to most of these problems. One of those is abortion. You keep insisting that women who have abortions suffer pain and trauma. Some do, but I can tell you that more women, and men, and children suffer trauma because they are forced into loveless marriages and families to raise an unwanted child. AND, I notice you still haven’t yet answered the question from upthread – what is your position on gay sex, which cannot result in unwanted pregnancies? You are pissing into the wind here. Perhaps this is the first environment you’ve entered where everyone is not lockstepping to the same religious/moral code as you. And just repeating your empty claims without seriously considering the replies and information offered is not going to convince anyone here. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/242 "2009-10-29T04:39:21Z")
> [@Nilesta](#): > > The ‘tragedy of women’ having abortions thing is not only factually wrong, it has this wonderful tendency to actually stigmatize women with postpartum depression after giving birth. Please stop. That’s just RUDE. How dare you marginalize my friends! ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/243 "2009-10-29T04:39:28Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > So I’ll take it that you don’t believe that women who have had an abortion suffer from any psychological problems due to their abortions? I know a few women who have had abortions and they would want to kick you in the nuts if they heard you say that. They most definitely had severe issues of remorse and guilt and depression. It’s attitudes like yours that cause women to feel guilty. There are women who feel dirty and ashamed for not being virgins too. There are people of both genders who feel guilty and depressed for being gay. Most women do not suffer any longlasting emotional consequences for abortion, though. It’s not something most of them _want_ to have to go through, but neither is an appendectomy. It’s not something that most women regret, though. The assertion that any woman who terminates a pregnancy will go through her life feeling horrible about is anti-choice wishful thinking – sour grapes really. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/244 "2009-10-29T04:41:45Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > That’s just RUDE. How dare you marginalize my friends! You’re the one who’s marginalizing them. You should apologize to them and let them know they’ve done nothing wrong. Have you ever done that? Have you ever let them know they did nothing wrong, or do you just reinforce their shame. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/245 "2009-10-29T04:43:36Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > AND, I notice you still haven’t yet answered the question from upthread – what is your position on gay sex, which cannot result in unwanted pregnancies? Oh, that was a serious question? I thought it was a joke. Surely you aren’t trying to say that the solution to the problem is that we all turn gay. This is a debate about heterosexual sex. My position on homosexuality is immaterial to this argument. You are just trying to pigeonhole me as a evangelical fundamentalist quack. > [@](#): > > You are pissing into the wind here. Yes, I know that. I never intended for the discussion to get so out of hand. I wanted to hear that maybe some of you had some different ideas about the solution, and maybe to open some other people’s eyes to the actual facts about protected sex. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/246 "2009-10-29T04:44:51Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > You should apologize to them and let them know they’ve done nothing wrong. Have you ever done that? Have you ever let them know they did nothing wrong, or do you just reinforce their shame. Actually I did. They were extreme cases, the ones that had no choice. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/247 "2009-10-29T04:45:21Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > Yes, you could. 5 out of every 1000 men who have had a vasectomy do get a woman pregnant. You shouldn’t have a problem with gay sex, though right? You never answered that question? Lesbian sex is esepcially safe, since not only is there zero chance of conception, there is no known case of female to female transmission of AIDS. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/248 "2009-10-29T04:46:35Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > Oh, that was a serious question? I thought it was a joke. Surely you aren’t trying to say that the solution to the problem is that we all turn gay. No. I just want to know if you have any objection to gay sex at all. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/249 "2009-10-29T04:46:51Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > Girls Gone Wild glorifies sex. Nah, that would be gilding the lily. Sex is pretty glorious, all on it’s own. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/250 "2009-10-29T04:48:28Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Most women do not suffer any longlasting emotional consequences for abortion, though. It’s not something most of them _want_ to have to go through, but neither is an appendectomy. It’s not something that most women regret, though. But you admit that they do suffer. Even going through the process is awful. Even if they leave with positive feelings, they still have to deal with the anxiety before the procedure. Wouldn’t it be better if they had never gotten pregnant to begin with? ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/251 "2009-10-29T04:50:15Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > No. I just want to know if you have any objection to gay sex at all. Well you can keep wanting because it’s not relevant. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/252 "2009-10-29T04:51:31Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Nah, that would be gilding the lily. Sex is pretty glorious, all on it’s own. Sorry, you are right. I meant to say that Girls Gone Wild glorifies hedonism. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/253 "2009-10-29T04:52:27Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > Well, **what IS your solution to the problem of a million unplanned pregnancies in America each year**? Yet again you have elided the difference between an unplanned pregnancy and an unwanted one. You can’t help yourself, can you? > [@](#): > > Abortion? And what effect would that have? Less severe than the effects of forcing women with un_wanted_ pregnancies to bear those children. As we know \*as a certainty \*for every other western society which makes abortion an option, not an ordeal? Have you ever considered why it is overwhelmingly men that are anti-abortion, and why women overwhelmingly support to right to abortion on demand? Have you ever considered they they may know, I don’t know, a MILLION TIMES what you do about the topic? Why _not_ let those know know the best make the choice? > [@](#): > > Don’t the large numbers of women who suffer from clinical depression, anxiety, and suicidal behaviors after an abortion count for anything? Of course they would if it were true. I dispute that any of these descriptors universally apply apart from the “anxiety” one; what new mother is not anxious? Have you ever considered that it is precisely the guilt that you religious types heap on single mothers in the USA that make women feel this way, to the extend that they do? YOU and your fellow repressors are precisely the problem. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/254 "2009-10-29T04:53:47Z")
> [@Kearsen](#): > > My only problem with current TV is that, even on the supposed ‘safe channels’ or ‘kids programming’ you have to be super careful what exactly is on the TV. > > That sucks. Well, there you go. You didn’t have to worry about that 40 years ago. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/255 "2009-10-29T04:54:20Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > But you admit that they do suffer. Even going through the process is awful. Even if they leave with positive feelings, they still have to deal with the anxiety before the procedure. Wouldn’t it be better if they had never gotten pregnant to begin with? Sure it would be better. That’s why we need better education and better access to birth control. If birth control fails, thank god we have legal abortion. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/256 "2009-10-29T04:57:38Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > Have you ever considered that it is precisely the guilt that you religious types heap on single mothers in the USA that make women feel this way, to the extend that they do? YOU and your fellow repressors are precisely the problem. Ah, I see. Rather than convince the country that there is no such thing as truly safe sex we should convince the pro-lifers that fetuses aren’t people and to convince pregnant pro-choice women that the little thing growing inside them is just a parasite. I see. I guess that WOULD solve the problem. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/257 "2009-10-29T05:02:08Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > … You are just trying to pigeonhole me as a evangelical fundamentalist quack… You are totall full of shit from yout first post onward. You finally pigeonholed yourself as a fundamentalist quack in [post #142](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=11707066&postcount=142). You said there you would still be opposed to pre-marital sex even if a 100% effective birth control method was available and used universally by everyone. This whole thread has been a sham. You are opposed to sex in any form except for procreation within a marriage, aren’t you? If not, under what other circumstances would sex be ok with you? Oh, and WTF does this mean? > [@](#): > > There are other issues at stake **(oxytocin bonding for example)** than pregnancy so until those issues were handled effectively then I’d have to say 'no, I’d still be against premarital sex. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/258 "2009-10-29T05:08:41Z")
> [@SmartAlx](#): > > Oh, that was a serious question? I thought it was a joke. Surely you aren’t trying to say that the solution to the problem is that we all turn gay. This is a debate about heterosexual sex. … No, it is a debate about when and with who sex is appropriate, and your insistance that sex is particularly harmful because it results in unwanted pregnancies. Well, gay people don’t face that particular harmful outcome because there is a zero percent chance of pregnancy. So, is it ok or not for gay people to have sex? ---
**Author:** ![SmartAlx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SmartAlx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAlx)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/259 "2009-10-29T05:26:43Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > You said there you would still be opposed to pre-marital sex even if a 100% effective birth control method was available and used universally by everyone. Because of other reasons, but does that disqualify this entire thread? If you are in a formal debate and someone makes a point, are you not allowed to refute that one point if you can? Does the fact that you try to refute the one point negate your entire argument? That’s ridiculous. Of course you can refute one point in the process of winning the debate. That is what I am doing with this thread, refuting that safe sex is the solution to the problem of millions of unplanned pregnancies. > [@](#): > > You are opposed to sex in any form except for procreation within a marriage, aren’t you? Absolutely not! As i said, I’m anti-Catholic. > [@](#): > > If not, under what other circumstances would sex be ok with you? As long as you are married you can get as freaky as you want and for any reason, but you shouldn’t assume that you won’t get pregnant. Married people are more likely to get stronger forms of birth control like IUDs and sterilization. Not that you can’t as a single person. It’s just that most single people don’t want a long term birth control solution. Also (since something like 25% of abortions are for married women) when you have sex (even married) you should take into account that there is a possibility that you will become pregnant. Since I am against abortion I also believe that children are best raised by a married couple. It’s all about the health of society. Healthy chilren equals a healthy society. > [@](#): > > Oh, and WTF does this mean? oxytocin bonding is a result of the bonding hormones that are released when you have sex. You become physically addicted to the person you have sex with. This is especially strong in women. The more people you have sex with the weaker this bond becomes when you do marry. But that is not appropriate in this discussion. This discussion is about contraceptive efficacy. Let’s get back on topic. ---
**Author:** ![Algorithm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/algorithm/32/12204_2.png) [@Algorithm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algorithm)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2009, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156/260 "2009-10-29T05:36:19Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Sure it would be better. That’s why we need better education and better access to birth control. If birth control fails, thank god we have legal abortion. Don’t forget researching more effective forms of birth control, which could eliminate or at least ameliorate the problem to the point that we don’t have OPs like this one any more. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-solution-to-a-million-unwanted-pregnacies-occurring-as-a-result-of-protected-sex/515156.md?page=14)